


Teyrn’s Daughter the origin story

by MEFangirl



Series: The Teryns Daughter [1]
Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-02-14 19:12:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 58,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13014333
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MEFangirl/pseuds/MEFangirl
Summary: Starting right at the beginning we meet Elise Cousland.Born into wealth and privilege, second only to royalty, Elise has spent her childhood around Nobles.  Unlike most young ladies however she has been trained as a rogue by her parents who believed that their children should take care of themselves and would make their mark on the world.Finding love with her fathers squire all be it forbidden Elise is about to have all she has known changed forever.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was something I had written and posted on my Deviant art account Have decided to post it up on here aswell. 
> 
> there is a fair bit of in game dialog as always the backgrounds and characters belong to bioware.

"You wanted to see me father?" 

"Ah there you are pup."

I really hate that nickname but he uses it because he knows I don't like it. 

"Howe you remember my daughter." 

"Yes, you've grown into a lovely young woman," Arl Howe say's. "It's nice to see you again my dear." 

I hold back the urge to outwardly shudder at his leering, there is something about that man I can't stand. I nod politely instead and ask after his family. 

"My son Thomas asked after you, I should bring him along next time I come." He says 

Dear maker, I remember Thomas. Always used to follow me around like a puppy, hanging on every word and gesture. I'm fairly certain it was he that informed father that Roland and I were seeing each other, father threatened to send me away but I begged him not too and we agreed to end it. I never said for how long though and after his 18th birthday in the barracks we started seeing each other again. In front of my parents and guests he behaves in a way one would expect a knight to behave towards the daughter of a Teryn and Teryner But when I get him on his own it's a different story. "Thomas is quite a few years younger than me isn't he?" I ask hinting that I'm not interested. 

"Not so much younger that you wouldn't make a good match." 

"What!" I say a little more sharply than I intended. Father of course laughs

"Howe stop teasing her. She won't be told anything these days. Her poor mother has tried marrying her off several times but she won't hear of it." 

"No doubt because you trained her as a warrior." Arl Howe says, "How unique." 

I hear the disapproval in his voice, mother is a trained warrior, why shouldn't I be. Fathers must have sensed I was about to say something as he interrupted me. 

"At any rate pup, I summoned you for a reason. While your brother and I are away you will be in charge of the castle. Only a token force is remaining here and you must keep peace in the region. You know what they say about mice when the cat is away. There is also someone you must meet." He turned to the guard, please show Duncan in. 

"It is an honour to be a guest in your hall teryn cousland," said the gentleman in battle dress to father as he walked up. 

Arl Howe seems unusually on edge all of a sudden. "Your lordship, you didn't mention a grey warden would be present." 

"Duncan arrived just recently and unannounced. Is there a problem?" 

"Of course not. But a guest of this stature demands certain protocol." He blusters, "I am at a disadvantage."

I watch him for a few seconds as his genuine surprise turns to fake pleasantry. I really don't like that man, he always sounds like he's plotting something. If I didn't know better I'd say he was Orliesan. 

"We rarely get the privilege of seeing one in person it's true." My father says, "Pup brother Aldridge taught you who the grey wardens were didn't he?" 

"Yes, they are a group of battle hardened warriors." I reply 

"They are the heroes of legend, they ended the last blight and saved us all. Duncan is here looking for recruits, before he joins his fellow wardens in the south, I believe he has his eye on sir Gilmore."

"Roland?" 

"My father raises an eyebrow at me, are we needing another discussion pup?" 

"If I may be so bold," Duncan interjected. "I might suggest your daughter would make an excellent candidate as well." 

"Really?" I say suddenly wondering what it would be like to be a grey warden. 

Father however stands in front of me quite protective. "As much as an honour that would be this is my daughter we're talking about." 

"Don't I get a say in it?" I ask

"Your mother would skin me alive if I let you go off to join the grey wardens." He turned back to Duncan. "So unless your invoking the rite of conscription Duncan"..

Duncan didn't let him finish, "have no fear, as much as we need as many good recruits as we can find I have no intention of forcing the issue." 

"Pup, make sure Duncan's requests are seen too when I'm gone." 

"Yes, of course father." 

"In the meantime, go find Fergus and tell him to go ahead with the troops to Ostegar and I will head out in the morning." He says.

"Why aren't you heading out together?" I ask

"My men have been delayed," Arl Howe says, "most unfortunate."

I eye him up suspiciously, "that's most fortuitous that you arrived ahead of them instead of waiting for your garrison." I say

He wrinkled his nose, "you are very like your mother." 

"Thank you," I say to him deciding to take it take that as a compliment though it wasn't given as one. "you are most kind." 

"Pup," my father said in a warning tone, noticing the sarcasm in my voice. "Be a good lass and do as I've asked." 

"Yes father, Where is Fergus?" 

"Upstairs in his chambers no doubt, saying goodbye to his wife and my grandson." 

I make my way out of the main hall and head towards the family quarters when Roland comes up to me. "There you are he says, Your mother said the Teyrn had summoned you and I didn't want to interrupt." 

"Hello Roland," I kiss him on the cheek. 

"My lady what if someone was watching he says looking round."  
I push him into an alcove, "there's no one here," I say before kissing him on the mouth, which to my delight he returns equally as passionately. "Did you want me for something?" 

"Hmm? oh yes, I've been looking all over for you." he says, "Your hound's been causing uproar in the kitchens again." 

"What you didn't come looking for me to drag me to your chambers and have your way with me?" I ask 

"Maker the things you say." He is smiling as he says it. "What if your mother or the Teryn was to hear?" 

"Mother would probably have a fit, she already despairs that I turn down every suitor." 

"I must admit that I'm glad that there isn't anyone else that has caught your eye." 

"You already caught my eye and have had my heart for the last few years." 

He smiled, I adore his smile. "As you have mine." He pulls me into his arms though his Armour makes it difficult for anything more than an awkward hug. Letting go, he says, "Nan is threatening to leave." 

"I take it he's got into the larder again." 

"Well it doesn't matter how many times the servants try keep him out he always gets back in." He says, "you know mabari hounds. He'll listen to his mistress but anyone else risks having an arm bitten off." 

"Ser woof a lot wouldn't bite you." I tell him, " he adores you as much as I do." 

"You'll make me blush," he said smiling again. 

"That I'd like to see," I giggle. "We better go and fetch him"

"That would be wise." 

As we make our way to the Kitchen I ask, "How's your family?"

"Well, last I heard," he says, "I haven't been back to see them since I came to squire here." 

"We'll go back to visit them some day Roland I promise." 

"I think my father may have a heart attack if I brought the Teryns daughter home." 

"You mean you haven't mentioned me in your letters?" 

"Of course I have, I talk about you all the time. I'm sure they suspect something is going on."

"Well, we will have to visit them when I'm your betrothed then." 

"Nothing would please me more," he said stopping and taking my hands in his. "But your parents would never allow it, I'm a knight in your fathers service my father is a minor lord. Our homestead in nothing more than a glorified farm, you deserve the best." 

"Roland, it will be my choice. You don't think I'd agree to being married off to someone mother had suggested for me do you?" 

He visibly relaxed, he put one hand on my face and kissed me, oh how he made me melt. "If I can rise high enough in ranks or if I get to become a grey warden I'll be able to ask for your hand." 

"What do you know of them?"

"Only the tales everyone tells, you rarely see one in person. I take great pride in serving the Teryn but if I was given the opportunity to be a grey warden I wouldn't hesitate." 

"You would make a fine warden Roland," I tell him. "Duncan could not have chosen a better candidate." 

"There was a rumour he mentioned you'd make a good grey warden." 

"Only if he invoked the right of conscription, father was very defensive when he suggested it. If it meant I got to go with you though I'd readily accept." 

"I can see him doing that too, I've heard it said that once you become a grey warden your old life is over so your father probably didn't want you to have to change".. 

"So I may never see you again?" Not liking the sound of that at all. 

"I hope that's not the case but I don't know what will happen." 

"If it's true, I'll just have to give you a send off you'll never forget just to make sure you come back to me." I wink at him suggestively. 

"Maker he mutters. Let's get to the kitchen before you distract me from my duties." 

"Oh, I intend to distract you once we get ser woof a lot." 

We get into the kitchen and see nan with her arms folded glaring at me, she always knows how to make anyone feel guilty. I sound defensive even though it's sir woof a lot and not me whose causing the trouble. 

"You," she snapped, "your bloody mongrel keeps getting into my larder, that beast should be put down." 

"He's not a mongrel he's a pure blood mabari." I say indignantly 

"Calm down, good woman, we've come to help." Roland gives me a look that said adding to Nans annoyance wasn't helping. 

"I'm sorry he's bothering you nan," I change tone, Roland was right, we've had her refuse to make dinners before and I didn't relish having to feed everyone in the castle because I gave her lip. 

"Just get him gone," she sighs, "I've enough to worry about with a castle full of hungry soldiers." 

We walk into the larder to find ser woof a lot pacing and sniffing the air. "Look at this mess," Roland shakes his head. "How did he even get in here." 

He starts jumping around me excitedly. "What a clever dog you are," I tell him, "yes you are."

"Oh yes, just encourage the hound why don't you? No wonder he keeps giving nan fits." he watches him for a minute, "He does seem like he's trying to tell us something." 

We hear a scrabbling noise. "Did you hear that?" he asks. Suddenly we are surrounded with rats, giant rats. 

"Where did they come from?" I ask, Unsheathing my daggers and pinning one against the wall. 

"What have they been eating that they are that size?"

"Nans roasts and ser woof a lot has been getting the blame." 

"It's like the start of every terrible adventure tale my grandfather used to tell." 

"Did they always start with giant rats?" 

"Some of them did." 

We killed the rest of the rats and headed back out the larder to nan. Ser woof a lot holding one in his mouth decided to deposit it at nans feet. "Maker what is that?"

"That's what's been raiding your larder," I tell her 

"Hmnf, I bet that dog led them into there to begin with." 

"He would never do that." I pat ser woof a lot's head 

"Likely story and don't you start with the sad eyes." she said to sir woof a lot who whined at her. "I'm immune to your so called charms." 

He whined again.

"Oh alright, here take these pork bits and don't say nan doesn't give you anything, to me she says, thank you m'lady, now I can get on." 

"You're welcome nan." 

"Now shoo and let me get the dinner under way or no one will eat tonight." 

Roland, I and ser woof a lot leave the kitchens. "Now you've got your mabari under control I'll need to get back to my duties." 

"Wait Roland," I grab his hand as he goes to walk away. He turns back "My lady?" 

"Don't go just yet." 

He wraps his arms around me and kisses me. "I'll see you after dinner." He said. "As much as I want to spend all my time with you I mustn't neglect my duties." 

I don't want to let him go but I Know that holding him back will get him into trouble with my father and I really don't want that.  
"Very well," I sigh giving him one last kiss. I head towards Fergus chambers and find Mother standing talking to some of our guests. "Darling," she says as I walk up. "You remember lady landra?"

"I think we met at your mother's spring salon." Lady Landra says smiling that half drunk lazy smile of hers 

Ah yes, lady landra, spent most of her time with a table of wine bottles and calling for more wine.  
"Of course I remember," I say, " its lovely to see you again." I give myself a mental jab in the ribs to stop me saying anything else. 

"Didn't I spend half the salon trying to convince you to marry my son." 

Dairren interjected, "and made a very poor case for it too I might add." 

"You remember my son Dairren, he's not married yet either." 

"Don't listen to her," he said, "Its good to see you again m'lady, you look as beautiful as ever." 

He always was a flatterer, quiet man too, not known for rowdy behaviour and just the type my mother liked. If they hadn't been so pushy I may have been more inclined to get to know him better

"You'd think that her beauty would make it easier to make a match for her, instead it makes it more difficult."

"Perhaps your daughter has a mind of her own my ladyship, you should be proud." 

"Thank you Dairren." I say my respect for him rising further. 

Mother sighs. "Proud doesn't get me more grandchildren." 

"I can handle my own affairs thank you." 

"All the evidence says to the contrary." 

"I think I will rest now my dear, Dairren I will see you and inola at dinner." 

"And we will retire to the study," Dairren says, "maybe we can talk later when you have time." 

"I'd like that." I bow politely to our guests and make my way to see Fergus. I walk in to find my nephew Oren asking Fergus if there was really going to be a war and can he have a sword. Though he pronounced it swoard. I remember asking father if I could have a dagger at his age. Mother forbade it of course, didn't stop him giving me a set when she wasn't around. "It's Sword Oren and I'll get you the biggest I can find and I'll be back before you know it." 

"I wish victory was indeed so certain," Orienna said," my heart is disquiet." 

My sister in law has a flare for the dramatic and my brother loved to get her in a state. "Don't frighten the boy love, I speak the truth and here's my little sister to see me off. Now dry your eyes and wish me well." 

"Do you want me to leave?" 

"No stay, I want to say goodbye." 

"Did you know there's a grey warden downstairs?" 

"Really?" Oren asked," was he riding a griffon?" 

"That's only in stories Oren, did he say why he was here?" 

"He's recruiting." 

"Oh, if I was a grey warden I'd have my eye on you." 

"He said as much but father put his foot down and said no. Besides he's got his eye on Roland, I mean ser Gilmore." 

"And that hasn't put the cat amongst the pigeons?" 

"What do you mean?" Orienna asked 

"My little sister has quite the thing for our young knight, she's always sneaking off to see him." 

"Ha how?" I feel myself going red was I really that obvious. 

Fergus laughed, "you think I didn't do something similar when I was your age." 

"Husband not in front of Oren." My brothers antics was something my sister in law hated having brought up in conversation. I can only imagine what he got up to with her before they wed and not something a decent lady should have broadcast either. 

"I wish you were coming with me though," he said. "Killing all those dark spawn myself will be tiring." 

"In Antiva a woman fighting in battle would be unthinkable."

"Is that so? I've heard that Antivan woman are quite dangerous." 

"with kindness and poison only my husband." 

Fergus laughed. "And this coming from the woman who serves me my tea." 

"Still I wish I was going with you." I tell him.

"If it's any consolation I'm sure I'll freeze in the southern rain and be completely jealous and wishing I was with you up here warm and safe." 

"I'm positively thrilled you'll be so miserable husband." 

"The things she says" 

"Father says you are to ride out without him and he will join you tomorrow." 

"So the Arls men are delayed, you'd think they were all walking backwards." 

"Yes, I don't entirely trust him, he seemed very vague when I questioned him about where they were."

"You are very suspicious sister." He gives me a hug and then says. "I best be off, lots of darkspawn to behead, so little time. I will see you soon my love." 

Father and mother walked in just then, "I would hope dear boy, that you were at least going to wait till we got here before taking your leave." 

"Be well my son, I will pray for your safety everyday you are gone." 

"You don't need to worry about Fergus mother." 

"I told you, No darkspawn can best me." 

Orianna began a prayer, "maker sustain and preserve us, watch over our sons, husbands and fathers and bring them safety back to us." 

"And bring us some ale and wenches while your at it. For the men of course." 

"What's a wench? Is that what you pull on to get the bucket out the well?" 

"Fergus you would say this in front of your mother?" Orienna asked. 

I attempted to hide my sniggering unsuccessfully given the look I received from mother. 

"A Wench Oren is a woman who pours the ale in the tavern. Or a woman who drinks a lot of ale." 

"Bryce!" My mother couldn't decide whether to scold or laugh. "Makers breath, its like living with two small boys, at least I have a daughter." 

"I'll miss as you too mother dear, take care of her while we're gone won't you sister." 

"Mother can take care of herself." 

"It's true they should be sending her not me, she'd scold those darkspawn back into the deep roads." 

"Well I'm glad you find it so funny." She says crossing her arms 

"Well, I'd be afraid of you wielding your sword or bow," I said to her. 

"What was I saying about having living with two small boys?" 

"Well, we best get down to dinner, or incur nans wrath." 

"Take care Fergus," I say giving my brother a hug. "Make the darkspawn wish they hadn't left the deep roads." 

The rest of us went to dinner and made idle talk with our guests. Arl Howe sat near the top of the table with my father and lady Lessandra next to mother. I was seated next to Dairren, probably a hint of mothers. He was an amenable man, well mannered, not arrogant and was in fact quite enjoyable company. "How are you enjoying your stay Dairren?" I ask 

"Your family is most hospitable, my lady. You have an excellent library, and the study is most comfortable may I ask who commissioned it?"

"It was my grandfather, I go to the study to read myself from time to time." 

"Do you have a particular favourite book?" 

"Passionate love by brother Genitivi." 

"That was the book that was banned by the chantry wasn't it? I've never read it myself." 

"I'll lend you my copy if you like." 

He chuckled, "maybe I should read it once I come back." 

"Oh that's right, you're riding out with father tomorrow aren't you." 

"Yes, I shall be his squire". 

"Hopefully, you won't have to see to much of the battle." 

"I believe I shall be tending to your father's horse and his armour. But I may see some fighting." 

"I knew enough from Roland that being a squire to my father was an honour. Dairren's father was a bann and one of the families that swore fealty to my father." 

"I was privileged indeed to be born into a family that was second only to royalty. I also knew better than to treat someone as beneath me because they weren't as high up in the nobility. 

After dinner I bade all goodnight and whistled for ser woof a lot. "Early night pup, called my father after me."

Yes father once I've taken ser woof a lot round the gardens." 

He went to say something else but arl Howe interrupted him, I disappeared before father could call me back. I made my way to the stables and the rooms above it. "Roland?" I call quietly. "Are you here?" Usually he would be in the barracks with the other men but he would come to the stable rooms when ever we'd arrange to meet up. 

"I'm here Elise" He's laying out his armour and preparing for bed. 

"I was hoping you weren't on duty" 

He smiled, "and why would that be?" 

"I wouldn't have been able to give you a proper goodnight kiss." I smiled back at him. 

"We can't have that now can we." 

"No we can't." I sit on his bed and pat the space next to me. "When are you on duty next?"

"At first light," he sits on the bed and pulls me in and kisses me. 

"So, enough time for a couple of hours of frolicking then." 

"The things you say," he kisses me again, I push him down on the bed and climb on top of him opening his shirt i kiss his mouth and then I kiss along his jaw, down his neck across his chest and when I get to his nipples I gently nip them. He squirms beneath me. "Elise please"..

"What's wrong?" I say teasingly. 

"Do you have any idea what you do to me?" I feel him stiffen in his breeches and wriggle into a better position. "That's not fair," he moans pulling me down and kissing me. He rolls me over so he's on top and pulls down the shoulders of my bodice and kisses along the top of my breasts, I shiver involuntarily with pleasure. He pulls it down further releasing my breasts which he grabs with his mouth and flicks the nipple with his tongue before gently sucking on them in turn. I wriggle and moan feeling more aroused. "Someone could walk in you know." he protests weakly 

"Roland please, father is riding out tomorrow and Duncan will probably be joining them the day after and if you go with them then, well this is the last chance we get to spend together, please don't stop now."  
He releases his erection and enters my hot wetness. I grip him and we simultaneously call out each other's names. He thrusts faster and deeper and cling to him kissing his collarbone and making him cry out and thrust harder till I can't take anymore and we come together. He pulls me into his arms and kisses my neck and bites gently on my ear before softly saying: "I will miss you terribly." 

I turn to face him. "And I you, I won't be able to sneak into your quarters any longer and make love to you, Or see you everyday or have mother send you to make sure ser woof a lot is kept out of trouble." 

"I love you Elise." 

"I love you Roland." 

We spend an hour or so wrapped in each other's arms and then I move to go more so we aren't discovered entangled around each other. It had taken me a long time to convince Roland to lay with me, at first he didn't want to as he wanted to wait till he could ask for my hand. But I promised him I that I only had eyes for him and said that there was no one else I wanted to be with, and so he relented and whenever we could spend anytime together alone and intimate we would. I don't want to scupper Roland's chances at either being chosen for grey warden or rising in the ranks to knight commander. My father may not want me to marry Roland but I was sure he wouldn't refuse his request, not if Roland was a high enough rank and he could prove how devoted he was too me. I kiss him goodnight and head off toward the castle. I let myself in through nans larder and sneak through the kitchen up the atrium and into my room. All seemed fairly quite and it looks like everyone has turned in for the night. I just start to fall asleep when I hear growling. Ser woof a lot is clawing at the door. 

"What is it boy?" 

I reach for my daggers and dress in my leather battle practise dress which I had slung on the chair before changing for dinner. I carefully open the door to see Howes men trying to get into mother and father's room.  
What is going on? Ser woof a lot growls and the soldiers turn round and advance swords drawn. So he was plotting something, I don't know why Howe has turned on my father but he would regret it. I throw one dagger at the face of the soldier hitting my mark and taking him down through his eye. "Sink him I command woof a lot." He pounces and pulls over the the soldier and I plunge a dagger through his chain mail and into his heart. My mother came out her room then in her battle armour bow and arrows equipped she dispatched two soldiers coming up towards their room. "Darling are you alright? I heard fighting outside." 

"I'm fine, but these are Howes men." 

"A scream woke me up and I heard men outside so I barred the door. Why would they do this?" 

"Howes betrayed father, I knew he was acting off when I asked where his men were." 

"You don't think they were delayed on purpose? That bastard, I'll cut his lying throat myself.  
Have you seen your father? He never came to bed." 

"No, I say, I was woken up by sir woof a lot barking and growling." 

"We must find him." We go to Fergus room and find Orianna and Oren dead. "That must have been the scream we heard, Noo my little Oren," she cries "what kind of fiend slaughters innocents?" 

I try to pull her away, "don't look Mother." 

"Oh, I'll look and I'll remember this day when Howe dies screaming like the dog he is." I put my arms around her as she starts to cry. "Poor fuckers, let's go I don't want to see this." 

"Howe will pay for this, we need to find father and the others." I need to find Roland I think to myself, maker let him be ok. We run down towards the kitchen, One of the stable hands comes running round the corner. "The castle has fallen," he shouts, "I'm getting out of here." 

"Wait!" I call to him, "we need help to fight them off and find the Teyrn. Please!" 

"Yes my lady," he says taking a sword and shield from mother. We fight our way through the castle checking rooms for anyone as we go. But everyone is dead. "I'm sorry," mother says when she finds lady landra. "This is all my fault." 

"It's not your fault," I tell her," this is Howes doing, he will pay for this treachery." We get to the main Hall still not finding father and find several guards and Roland fighting off a group of ten soldiers. We join them, I dodge their mages attack and throw a dagger at her staff hand. It hits causing her drop her staff and giving me enough time to get her into a lock with one arm whilst slitting her throats with the dagger in my other hand. "Man the gate," Roland shouted to the remaining guards. "Make sure those bastards don't get through. Your Ladyship, my lady," he said coming up to us. "You're alive, I was sure Howes men had gotten through. I thought I'd lost you." he looks at me when he said it 

impulsively I hug him, "he did, we killed most of the bastards. I'm glad to see you alive." 

"They killed Orianna and Oren, I can't believe it. Are you injured?" Mother asked. Despite her not wanting Roland and I to be together she still treated him like he was family. 

"Don't worry about me your ladyship," Roland told her, " I thank the maker you two are unharmed." 

"I worry Roland," I say quietly.

He looks at me," I know I'm sorry I couldn't come to find you. When I realised what was happening I tried to get the gates shut as soon as I could, It won't keep them out for long though. If you've another way out the castle use it quickly." 

"We need to find your father." My Mother says looking back towards the door we came in. 

"When I last saw the Teyrn, he'd been badly wounded," Roland tells her, "I urged him not to go but he was determined to find you." 

"We need to find him, He may be at the tunnel entrance near nans larder." 

"That's where he was heading when I last saw him." 

"What about you? You're coming with us aren't you?" I suddenly feel a horrible sensation wash over me, I'm not going to see him again. He's not going to live through this, suddenly I don't want to go. 

"I need to help keep the gates shut as long as possible," he says taking my face in his hands and kissing me one last time. "I love you." 

"No! Roland, I can't leave you." 

"Please Elise, you have to go, I'll buy you what time I can, I can't have Howe hurt you." 

"Please Roland," I beg him. He hands me a small package. "I was going to give you this before I left to become a grey warden. Take it now." I take the package and tuck it into the breast of my leather armour so it won't fall out. I give him another kiss and wrap my arms around him. Mother has to prise me from him with tears streaming down my face. "He'll die mother." 

"I'm sorry darling, but Roland knows his duty and he's trying to keep you safe, Find Howe and make him Pay." We find father where Roland said he'd be in the larder. "There you both are, I was wondering when you'd get here." He's holding his side but he'd lost a lot of blood. I don't think he's going to make it. "Bryce!" Mother runs to his side and tries to bandage him up. " What happened?"

"Howes men found me first, almost did me in." 

"As soon as Howes men break through the gates they'll find us. We need to go." 

"I'm afraid I won't survive the standing." 

"No father, we'll get out of here all of us." 

"Someone needs to find Fergus and tell him what happened." 

"You can tell him yourself," I crouch next to him trying to help Mother stop the bleeding.

"I wish I could go on." 

"Bryce no," my mother holds his hand, "the servants passage is right here, we can flee together. Find you healing magic." 

"The castle is surrounded." he tells us, "I cannot make it." Duncan came through the door just then, wiping the blood from his sword before sheathing it. " I'm afraid the Teryn is correct," he said, "Howes men have not yet discovered this exit, but the castle is surrounded." 

"You are Duncan then," My mother says, the grey warden. 

"Yes, your ladyship, your husband and I tried to reach you sooner." 

"My daughter helped me get this far"., she takes me hand, the maker be praised. 

"I am not surprised, she's a very capable warrior. You taught her well." 

"Are you going to help us Duncan?" I ask him.

"Whatever is to be done it must be quick." Mother says to him. 

"Duncan you are under no obligation to me but I beg that you take my wife and daughter with you to safety." 

"I will your lordship, but I must ask something in return. What is happening here pales to the evil that has been unleashed on the world and I came here seeking a recruit. The darkspawn demands that I don't leave without one." 

"I..". 

"I will go with Duncan and become a grey warden father," I say interrupting him. "Fergus is at Ostagar is he not? I can let him know what has happened." 

"Bryce are you sure?" 

"Our daughter will not die of Howes treachery, she will make her mark on this world." 

"Darling go with Duncan, you have a better chance of escape without me." 

"Eleanor."  
"Mother." 

"My place is with you Bryce, We live together we will die together. And I will take out as many of those bastards as I can before I go." 

I give mother and father a final hug goodbye before leaving down the passage with Duncan. I am about to leave my parents and the man I love to die at the hands of a betrayer. But I cannot think about it now, I cannot grieve. We have to get away from here.


	2. No one wants to be the bearer of bad news.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having just escaped a terrible fate, Elise is on her way to Ostagar with Duncan, even though she is still coming to terms with what has happened, she feels Roland's family must be told what has happened to their son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always the backgrounds and characters belong to bioware. some mention of cannon but mostly my own creation of the trip to Ostagar.

We walked for about 5 miles in silence when Duncan suggested we take a break. I hadn’t even realised how far we’d walked I was lost in my own thoughts. "The King will want to know about this," he said, "I believe he and your Father were on very good terms."

"I believe so, I have to ask would you have recruited Roland?"

"Ser Gilmore was recommended, I apologise," he said when I flinched at him saying was, "were you close?"

"Yes very."

"Your father wouldn’t have approved however."

"He didn’t, he tried to separate us and I only relented because I didn’t want father sending Roland away or having me sent away either. Roland wanted to rise in rank to knight commander before asking for my father’s blessing."

"Would he have given it?"

"Do you think it would have mattered if he hadn’t? I am a grown woman, they’d have had to have disowned me than stop me marrying him."

Duncan chuckled, "very determined young woman."

"Roland may not be high in the noble Hierarchy but he was a strong, kind and loving man much like my father is, was," I corrected myself. 

"I agree," said Duncan, "however you were always my first choice."

"Why?" My curiosity was piqued. 

"Your parents were both fearsome warriors and they have brought both you and your brother up to be equally as strong and fearsome as they were. We need your skill and determination to end this blight." 

"So you believe it is a blight then?"

"The arch demon hasn’t shown itself as yet but I believe it to be so." There wasn’t anything I could say to that. If it was indeed a blight then no one was safe, not just us but everyone who swore fealty to my Father, Roland’s Family. I had to let his parents know and I had to be the one to tell them. "I know you are anxious to get back to Ostagar as am I to find my brother," I say. "but may I ask that we go by way of the Bannorn. I must inform Roland’s family what has happened and I feel it’s only right that I do it."

"We will need to cross Lake Calenhad anyway so if his family’s homestead is near there then we can stop"

"Thankyou." We traveled on foot and by passing carriage for several days till we reached Lake Calenhad, I asked around if anyone knew where The Gilmore family homestead was and was pointed a few miles south. A kind farmer lent us two of his horses to ride out there. Roland was right it was beautiful, their Farm was nestled into the valley but you could still see Lake Calenhad shimmering in the distance. It was early evening when we arrived and there was a man working in the field, he looked up as soon as he heard our approach. I knew immediately it was Roland’s father. He looked so much like him that I almost burst into tears right there. But I had to keep my composure. I don’t remember meeting Roland’s family and I don’t want to alarm them. Roland however seems to have told them about me because he comes over and gives me a fatherly hug. The comforting embrace is too much and I breakdown,

"My dear what is wrong," but I can’t get the words out and it is left to Duncan to explain what has happened. His mother is naturally beside herself and I find myself apologising for leaving him behind. "I couldn’t get him to leave," I tell them, "he insisted I go, that he would hold them off as long as possible to give me a chance to escape. I didn’t want to leave him, mother had to drag me away."

"He was very fond of you," his mother said, "most of his letters were full of what a strong determined and beautiful women you'd grown up to be and that you fought as well as your father as brother, he was very proud of you."

"I loved your son dearly," I confessed to her," and he loved me."

She hugged me tightly, "you came here to let us know yourself when you could have sent a messenger, I can see in your eyes what he meant to you."

"I swear to you that I will avenge him and my parents and all the innocent people that bastard Howe had murdered."

We stayed there that night, when I said I didn’t want to impose after bringing them such horrible news they’d insisted. I stayed in the room Roland had as a child as I undressed the package Roland had given me fell onto the floor. Inside was a letter and a locket inside was engraved our initials inside a heart. The letter read: My Dearest Love,

I leave this letter in the hope that we will see each other again, I do not know what will happen in Battle, I pray the Maker allows me to see you again but should the worst happen and I fall then maker keep you safe. Know I will always love you, you are everything to me. I will miss you every day we are apart and I await the day we see each other again, either in person when I can hold you in my arms again or at the maker’s side.

Always in my Heart

Your Roland.

 

I slid down the bed onto the floor his locket wrapped my wrist and his letter crumpled to my breast and allowed myself to cry. Ser woof a lot pushed his head into my lap and I put my arms around him. "It’s not fair boy," I bury my face into his fur. "I’ll never see him or my parents again." The next morning I woke slightly disoriented unsure of where I was. I had slept slightly better than I had the last few nights maybe it had something to do with being in Roland’s home. His parents asked me how I was feeling. "Being here has helped, thank you for insisting we stay the night. We must take our leave, we have imposed on you enough and I know the warden – commander is anxious to get to Ostagar and I must find my brother." 

"Before you go we would like you to take this, we had it commissioned for Roland when he became a knight but we never got the chance to give it to him." They hand me a longsword with the Cousland crest and his name engraved into the hilt. It had a double edge and was perfectly balanced. I sheath it and pull the straps over my shoulders. 

"Thank you, it’s beautiful. Roland would have loved it." We bade his parent’s goodbye after I gave them a final hug and rode back to the farmer who had lent us the horses. I thanked him again and he wished us luck on our continued journey. We took the ferry across Lake Calenhad and rested at the Spoiled Princess Inn. In order to take my mind off everything that had happened I asked Duncan if he had any family. He was very vague saying that he grew up in a homestead not far from our castle and ended up in Orlias during the war where he was conscripted into the order. 

"You were conscripted? I would have taken you for a man who would have volunteered."

Duncan chuckled, "I thank you for your noble sentiment but I had not wanted to join the order, the previous warden commander conscripted me, now I’ve been in it for so long I have grown up to be a better man." As he wasn’t offering any further explanation I decided to drop the subject.

"How long till we reach Ostagar?"

"I’ve arranged for us to travel on a supply caravan most of the way there so about another 4 days all being well."

"All being well?"

"The road is full of bandits and I bartered our passage by saying we’d act as protection for them." 

Makes sense, we are well armed and I can aim my pent up anger at Howe at any bandits. To Duncan I say, "Very well." For the first day it was quiet no bandit activity and ser woof a lot slept in the carriage for most of it whilst Duncan and I took turns keeping lookout. On the second day a group of bandits attempted to hold us up. Before Duncan could climb down off the carriage I whistled ser woof a lot and walked over to the leader. 

"Can we help you with something?"

"Look at this one the leader," called back to his cronies, walking round me and looking me up and down with a lecherous look. Ser woof a lot snarled at him and he took a hasty step back. "Now, we don’t want any trouble," he said looking warily at ser woof a lot. 

"Unless you’re looking for aid," I tell him, "trouble is what you’ll have found."

"Now what’s a slip of a girl like you going to do?" He asked

I unsheathe my dagger and before he realising what’s happening I’ve kicked his knees out so he’s fallen to the floor stood over him and held my blade to his jugular. I could quite easily slit your throat I say quietly into his ear.

"Wait, wait, no need to be hasty he said putting his hands up in surrender." 

"Be on your way then, I say releasing him." 

He scrambles to his feet and tells his men to get going. "What we’re going to let her get away with that?"

"I don’t fancy having my throat slit." The leader said, "they are too well armed to mess with, we took enough of a loss with the last lot that came through here." 

We continued on our journey and felt Duncan watching me appraisingly. "Interesting way of dealing with bandits he said."

"Mother would always say find out the enemy intentions before attacking, If they attack you finish them. No need to end someone’s life unless it’s necessary."

"You can’t reason with darkspawn."

"Creatures who are mindless are easier to kill." 

"Where did you learn that move?"

"My mother," I said. "As you probably know my Mother was a battle maiden. I’ve heard the stories of how she and father met and how they fought against the Orlesians on my Grandfathers Warship."

"I have heard the tales of the Sea wolf, I hear songs still when I’ve travelled to the free marches."

"Mother was infamous." I laugh.

"It has worked to your advantage that she was," he tells me. 

"Doesn't give me the greatest comfort though."

"I am sorry for your loss," Duncan says, "no words will really ease the pain."

"I imagine as a warden you have seen your fair share of loss."

"I have seen many of my fellow wardens killed in battle. Those that I viewed as friends, family."

"I never thought about that, they become your family don't they? doesn't it make it difficult for you when you lose someone?"

"We accept death is part of the being a warden, but it doesn't make it easier to accept when it happens. you will face much in the days and weeks to come, use that anger and grief you feel and channel it."

Take it out on the Darkspawn and use it as motivation, I fully intend too.

"You will make a fine warden," he says. 

"Time will tell." 


	3. Into the wilds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They finally arrive in Ostagar, Elise informs the King and meets others who will impact on her life in ways she hadn't thought possible.
> 
> As always the background and characters belong to Bioware. there is some in game dialog.

We reached Ostagar with little resistance, "here we are at Last," Duncan says helping me down from the carriage. 

Waiting at the gate is King Cailan himself. "King Cailan," Duncan bows, "I did not expect"...

"A royal welcome?" Cailan interrupts. I curtesy and then he takes a good look at me. "Your Bryce Couslands girl aren’t you?" He asks me. "I’m surprised he let you join the wardens. Where is he?" He looked over my head as if expecting my father to turn up any moment.

"There is some bad news I’m afraid your Majesty," Duncan begins but I interrupt: "My father is dead."

"Dead? What do you mean dead, What happened?"

"Howe is a traitorous Bastard, He had his men delayed and then had his men slaughtered my family, Even the family we had visiting. I only got out because of Duncan."

"What! Why would he do such a thing? And how did he think he’d get away with it? I promise as soon as this battle is over my men and I will March and I will deal with Howes treachery. He will hang, I know it’s of little comfort to you now."

"Thankyou your Majesty, that’s all I ask."

"Call me Cailan, we will be fighting together soon enough, no need to stand on ceremony. I’m afraid your brother is out scouting the Kacori wilds or I would have him sent for."

"Oh, I was hoping to tell him as soon as possible."

"There’s nothing I can do for now until the battle is over. I’m sorry"

"Your Uncle sends his regards and reminds you his forces will be here within the week."

"Ha, Eamon just wants in on the glory, we’ve won three battles against this monsters and tomorrow will be no different."

"It’s going that well?" I ask.

"I’m not even sure it’s a true blight. We’ve seen no sign of an arch demon."

"Disappointed your Majesty?"

"I was hoping for a glorious battle like the old tales, where the wardens rode in on griffons."

I looked at Duncan who had a neutral expression and I wondered if it was something he had had to master. Was the King serious? This wasn’t a game! He was leading good men into battle and some would not make it out. He sighed, "I best be getting back to my Tent, Lohgain wants to go over strategies for the Battle tomorrow." We bowed to each other and he turned and left.

"Is it really going that well?"

"We have won several battles already against the darkspawn its true. However the horde gets bigger each day and soon it will outnumber us."

"So you think he’s being a little Naive?"

"I wouldn’t have put it like that."

"Well what would you do?"

"Wait for reinforcements, there are few enough grey wardens in Ferelden as it is and I know there is an arch demon behind this."

"Gut feeling?"

"Experience, but I can’t expect the king to go on that alone. So we’ll hope Loghains forces can make up for what we lack." Something feels wrong and I don’t like the sensation. I refrain from saying anything to Duncan though.

"We need to proceed with the Joining," he says. "Go find Alistair as he will be taking you out to the kocari wilds as part of the Joining."

"Where will this Alistair be exactly?" but Duncan has already gone towards the Kings tent. I could use a meal and a nap but as it looks like time is short that isn’t going to happen. "Come on Boy," I say to ser woof a lot. "Better go find another grey warden." I walk across the battlements and take in the Tevinter architecture. Even though it was crumbling in parts for the most part it was still standing tall. They knew how to build to last, I’ll say that for them. We cross the bridge and greet the soldier standing guard on the other side. He nods his head in acknowledgement and asks how my journey was?

"Mostly uneventful," I reply.

"Are you the latest warden recruit?"

"How many recruits are there?"

"With you that makes three."

"Do you know where I can find a Warden called Alistair?"

"Go left past the mages and the merchant and up the ramp he’s often seen up round that side of the ruins."

"Thank you," I bow and whistle ser woof a lot. We make our way round the camp and I watch the mages practicing spells before a Templar comes out and tells me to move along, they aren’t there for my entertainment. I’m too tired to bother with any retort and move off to find wherever Alistair is. Ser woof a lot is bounding around me and bumps into another Mage.

"Oh I’m sorry. Ser woof a lot, say sorry to the lady." He puts his head down and whines

"It’s quite alright," she says. "You’re the new grey warden recruit aren’t you?"

"Does everyone know who I am?"

"I overheard King Cailan talking to his guardsmen, I am Wynne a Senior Enchanter for the Cirle of Magi."

"Nice to meet you."

"Good luck to you on the battlefield, in fact good luck to us all. Can I ask have you fought any darkspawn?"

"No, I was too busy fighting Howes Men."

"Yes, I heard the King mention it. I’m so sorry," she said sombrely. " I can’t even imagine what that kind of loss feels like."

"Thank you, for now I need to direct my grief at the darkspawn. How Many Mages are here from the circle?"

"There are thirty or so sent from the circle. A few senior Mages like myself and a few older more experienced apprentices."

"Do you think that’s enough?" 

"It’s all they would send, many of the mages are either too young or too old now to fight."

"Let us hope the battle is over quickly for all our sakes. I must take my leave and find a warden named Alistair. You haven’t seen him by any chance have you?"

"The young Blonde man?"

"I’m afraid I don’t know what he looks like." 

"He passed by a short while ago. Just go up that slope and veer right up the other slope, You won’t miss him."

"Thank you," I bow and ser woof a lot and I walk up the slopes till we are standing in a circular tower whose walls had long since crumbled. At the top was a mage who appeared to be arguing with a young man over six feet tall with sandy blonde hair and Wynne was right quite young. I’d have said about two or three years younger than myself. His build was similar to Roland. He was rather striking and he reminded me of Cailan. "You know he says turning to me, one good about the blight is it brings people together."

"So it would seem."

"It’s like one big party, we all stand around holding hands now that would give the darkspawn something to think about."

"You must have been to some very strange parties."

"We wardens know how to party."

"This should be good, One party I was at ended up with me dancing on tables and falling asleep on the floor. I had to be carried to bed."

"I think I should come to your parties."

"Maybe I’ll treat you to my table dancing display after the battle is over."

"Oh," he suddenly turns away but not before I’ve noticed him blushing. And without thinking about what I’m doing I grab his hand.

"I’m sorry I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I’m used to teasing Roland and him teasing me."

"No, its ok I’m not used to such risqué talk from a lady. Come to think of it there aren’t many women in the grey wardens, I wonder why that is."

"Would you like more women in the grey wardens?"

"If they are like you then I don’t see why not."

"Like me? Beautiful, full of risqué talk and libel to do things the chantry wouldn’t approve of?"

"What sort of thing’s?"

"The sort of things that drive men wild." I had no idea why I was saying that but I was rather enjoying making him blush and wanted to see just how easily I could make it happen. Alistair began to turn scarlet. Oh he’s so cute. Stop it, I say to myself you’ve just lost Roland. "Well," I say, "I came to fetch you, Duncan wants to begin as soon as possible."

"Right, I didn’t get your name by the way."

"Elise, Elise Cousland."

"Cousland? Where have I heard that name before?"

"My brother is here somewhere." 

"Ah yes, Fergus isn’t it? Seems a decent sort. well I’ll be taking you out to the kocari wilds."

"You’re taking me out? We’ve only just met."

"What? There are three of you altogether." 

"I’ve heard of these parties, my brother and his friends used to be into those."

"What?" Realisation dawned on Alistair blushed again. "I think we should get back to Duncan."

"He’s no fun is he ser woof a lot?" Ser woof a lot barked in agreement.

"Is he yours?" Alistair asked suddenly relieved he could change the subject.

"Yes, I’ve had him since he was a pup."

"You’re fortunate to have your own Mabari."

"You say that but he’s always get into trouble. Well he used to, I suppose now he’ll be killing darkspawn with us."

"Won’t be getting into trouble anymore will you boy." Alistair said patted ser woof a lot on the head. He bounced around him barking in approval. He was a good judge of character, "Well he approves of you," I tell Alistair. " I look forward to travelling with you."

"You are?" He looked taken aback, "well that’s a switch." I give him a puzzled look before asking "shall we go?"

"Yes, let’s get the others." We head back down the slope and into the main camp. On the way down we meet up with Daveth, the rogue I heard being rebuffed by a young female soldier earlier.

"Well hello beautiful." I hear Alistair mutter behind me about not the way to talk to a lady.

"Hello aren’t you the one I saw get turned down by that soldier earlier?" Alistair cough laughed.

"Yeah but you’re here now, you going to be a grey warden too?"

"That’s the plan."

"Not seen any women within the grey wardens."

"There aren’t many apparently."

"Wonder why that is?"

"A question for Duncan perhaps."

"Well best get to it I suppose, I’m Daveth by the way."

"I’m Elise."

"You the one Duncan went to fetch then?"

"Not exactly."

"Where’s ser Jory?" he asks looking around.

"Oh we have a knight joining us do we?"

"He may already be with Duncan," Alistair interjects.

"He was with the other knights in the garrison last I saw of him."

"I’ll go check, you two go on ahead." With that Alistair took off at a pace up another slope to look for ser Jory.

We headed back to Duncan who was standing by a fire. "Where’s Alistair?" 

"Here," he said returning with Ser Jory. "I believe that’s everyone."

"Good, As part of the ritual, we send you out to retrieve darkspawn blood we need one for each of you."

"What do we need that for?" Daveth asked.

"It’s part of the ritual and you will find out later. Whilst you are out in the kocari wilds I need you to retrieve the warden treaties from a tower the wardens once possessed."

"Collect darkspawn blood and collect treaties. Right, got it."

" Now, Alistair will be with you and will ensure you all arrive back safely."

"Anything else?"

"Be as quick as you can. We won’t have much time to rest before the battle tomorrow. Alistair watch over them."

"Yes Duncan."

"Also leave your hound with me, he will be safe here."

We all head into the Kocari wilds and I’m mindful that my brother is scouting out here somewhere. Not far in we are attacked by a pack of wolves and Daveth takes down two with his bow, Jory beheads another I slash across another’s underbelly who leapt up at me. Alistair blocks the attack of the last one before jabbing his sword into its side. As we move deeper into the wilds we come across a group of soldiers all dead, but one who is dragging himself towards us. I instantly recognise the armour and shield. It’s my father’s men. I tend his wounds and ask where Fergus is.

"Lady Cousland? What are you doing here?"

"I’ve been recruited into the grey wardens Gideon. Where is Fergus?" 

"I’m not sure my lady we got separated. We were ambushed by darkspawn. I’m all that’s left."

"Out of how many men?"

"There was twenty of us my lady, the rest were with his Lordship."

"Let’s get you back to the camp." I help him up to his feet.

"I’ll be alright now you’ve patched me up my lady, I’ll make my own way back."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes m’lady. Is Roland with you? I know you two were close if that’s not too impertinent too say."

"I don’t want to burden you with it now, Gideon. Once I get back I will tell you what has occurred since you left Highever." He nods and limps off, I watch him make his way back. 

"Maybe I should make sure he gets back ok," I say to Alistair. " We’ve lost enough good men."

"I’ll wait for you but we don’t have much time." 

I turn and watch Gideon for a few minutes. "No we need to get on, I’m sure he’ll be ok."

Jory starts to Panic, "they were a group of Soldiers and got wiped out by darkspawn, what chance do we have?"

"Know this you will face danger, but as a warden I can sense darkspawn so we won’t be taken by surprise."

"See ser knight we may die but we’ll know about it first."

"Very reassuring," ser Jory says. 

The first group of Darkspawn that Alistair warns us of seemingly came out of nowhere no wonder my father’s men were overrun. An Arrow grazed my face, I looked up and saw a gruesome figure taking aim with a bow and arrow. Daveth shot two arrows at the creature, both went through its chest. The smaller creatures on the ground swarmed round Jory and Alistair. Jory swung his Sword round sending several flying, whilst Alistair Blocked an attack with his shield and drove his sword through its midsection. Another of the taller creatures appeared and I sliced away its legs then beheaded it. Once the fight was over Alistair handed me three vials in which to fill with the creature’s blood. They smelled of rotting corpses and I had to stop myself from retching. I gave the Vials to Alistair who handed me a container of water which I used some of to pour on my hands and wash off the blood and then took a drink. "So how come the grey wardens can sense the darkspawn?" I ask Alistair.

"If I could tell you I would," he says, "but its secret for a reason. You will find out soon enough."

"So all wardens sense the darkspawn? Anything else that makes wardens special?"

"We’re immune to the taint." He says.

"One good thing then. This ritual doesn’t involve blood magic does it?"

" Please don’t ask me anything else."

"Afraid I’m going to wheedle the secrets out of you?"

"I’ve no doubt you could get anything you want from me."

"Now there’s a thought," I say. " I may have to test that back at camp." Alistair blushes. 

"Do you know where we are going to find these treaties?"

"A little further in," he says consulting a map,"we have to cross a bridge and the Tower sat on a hill."

"This must be it," Jory said about to step onto the bridge.

"Wait!" Daveth barrelled into him knocking him over

"What in andraste are you doing?"

"Traps," he says pointing to the spring loaded spikes protruding out the grass they were badly covered with. I set one off on with my sword and Daveth disarmed the others whilst Jory got back to his feet. However before we realised it we were surrounded again. I drove my blade into the nearest Hurlock before being hurled back by a magic blast temporarily winded. "An Emissary," Alistair called. "Take him out before he starts calling up undead." He charges towards a Hurlock who was near enough to take a swing at me whilst I was still grounded and put his shield between me and its blade, in another swift movement he thrusts his sword into the creature. 

"That was a little to close," I say as he pulls me to my feet. "Thanks." Before he has a chance to reply he’s pulled me in and held his shield up to absorb the bolt of magic from the emissary. He drops his arm and grabs his sword to take on a Grenlock whilst I go into a stealth run and come up behind the Emissary that Daveth is firing arrows at, I push aside the feeling that I got when Alistair pulled me in to defend us, instead i concentrate on driving both my daggers into below the creature’s shoulder blades causing it to drop its staff and allow ser Jory to cleave it in two. Once the area was clear Daveth and I sat on the hill and looked about. "We don’t really have time to relax," Alistair said looking about.

"Are there more darkspawn about?"

"Not at the moment." I tap the grass next to me, "I need a minute Alistair, sit down. We can get the treaties in a moment." He sits down next to me and pulls out a flask of water and offers it too me. I take a mouthful and hand it back. "Thanks, So while we’ve got a minute I’d like to know about you."

"Me?"

"All of you. We are going to be wardens after all."

"Well yes if you sur.". he stops realising he’s about to say to much.

"We’ve survived thus far," said Daveth. Alistair says nothing and I watch his expression. That’s not what he meant I realise. To change the subject I ask Daveth where Duncan recruited him.

He laughed, "He conscripted me. I was in Denerim and went to steal his purse, he’s pretty fast for an old guy. Anyway he stopped me from heading for the hang man’s noose."

"You’re a catpurse?" Ser Jory asks

Daveth shrugged, "everyone has to get by somehow."

"The Wardens don’t turn away thieves and Murderers or even blood mages," Alistair tells him. "They take whomever is able to end a blight, fight darkspawn, those willing and those who aren’t."

"Even Duncan was conscripted," I tell them.

"He was?" Both Jory and Alistair look at me in surprise

"He said as much when we travelling here." 

"Did he say why?"

"No and I didn’t ask. I was a distracted at the time. Are you alright?" He looked like he’d just found out his mabari had died and they’d replaced him without telling him.

"Yes, it’s nothing."

"As you wish," I turn to Ser Jory. "How did you end up here Ser Jory?"

"I won a tourney to be here," he said somewhat proudly, "I hail from Redcliffe, I was a knight in the service of Arl Eamon. Duncan recruited me in highever, have you ever been there?"

"I’m from there, My father is/was the teryn."

"My lady Cousland, I Apologise I didn't recognise you, its’s an honour. Did you see the Tourney?"

"Some, Ser Gilmore was also in the Tourney."

"Yes, I remember Ser Gilmore. I was expecting him to be here actually."

"He was meant to be." I bite my lip in order to quell the rush of emotions that began to well up at the mention of him. "I’ve taken his place."

He looked puzzled, "I didn’t think they allowed woman in the wardens. I mean to say that I haven’t seen any amongst the ones here."

"There are few I’m told and mine was special circumstances." It was clear that he wanted so say more but had the grace not to intrude. Alistair however listening to the conversation asks "Are you alright?"

"No, but we need to find those treaties and get back." I stand and help pull him up. He doesn’t say anything but I can feel him looking in my direction as we make our way to the ruined tower. After searching the grounds we come across an old rotted and broken chest. "There isn’t anything here." I call, "is this definitely the place?"

"Yes, Duncan Marked it on the map. There isn’t any other tower that was once the wardens round here."

"Well well," said a voice. "What have we here I wonder, Are you a vulture? a scavenger come to pick over bones that have long been cleaned? or intruders coming into these dark spawn wilds of mine searching for easy prey? A woman appeared from behind a crumbling pillar, what say you?"

"We are wardens, come to retrieve the treaties from this tower."

"Ah well, this is a tower no longer." 

"She's a witch of the wilds she is." Daveth says, "I've heard about them, she'll turn us into toads."

"I'll turn you into a toad in a minute if you don't shut up," ser Jory says to him.

She laughed at him. "witch of the wilds is it?" 

"Be careful," Alistair says in a low voice, "she may be chasined and others may be nearby."

"Oh, are we afraid Barbarians are going to swoop down on you?"

"yes," Alistair replies voice dripping with sarcasm, "swooping is bad."

"What about you?" she raises an eyebrow at me. "is a woman so scared of someone such as myself?"

"Hardly," I reply. "I don't really care what you are. I just want to get these treaties and get back."

"Treaties? oh you won't find them there."

"What have you done with them?" demanded Alistair.

"I don't have them."

"Right, give them back you, you sneaky witch thief."

"Really Alistair?"

The woman looked at him with disdain. "I shall not, for I didn't take them."

"Let me handle this." I turn to the woman," I believe introductions are in order. My name is Elise and you are?"

"I am Morrigan," she says

"Pleased to meet you."

she chuckles"manners" she says. "How novel."

"As you seem to know what has happened to treaties, would you mind telling me who took them?"

"twas my mother in fact," she says glaring at Alistair who steps behind me in case she sets him alight.

"Can you take us to her?"

"now," she says "that is the most sensible suggestion I have heard yet. Follow me."

Daveth and Alistair mutter about ending up in a stew pot whilst Jory mutters about being cold. I roll my eyes at Morrigan, who sniggers. she takes us to a hut further into the wilds and calls out Another older woman. she feels oddly Familiar, I am not sure why, but she is too young to be anything but related to the woman described by Brother Albas. At first she scoffs at Alistair and Daveth and Jory's protests about being a witch, she turns her gaze to me and I feel as if shes appraising me.

"What say you? what does the warden say."

"I'm not a warden yet." noting that she dismissed both Daveth and Jory. "but if your asking what I think of you, I've yet to make up my mind. you seem somewhat familiar."

"I wonder," she says, then suddenly, "we shall see, we shall see" and cackles. "you want your treaties, here they are" and hands them to Alistar. "I met your father," she tells him. 

"What? how could you possibly know my father?" he asks.

I put a hand on his arm. "We should go, anything else is not important now."

Again she looks at me, but says nothing. "Morrigan," she calls instead. "take our guests back to whence they came." 

"Fine I'll show them out into the wilds."

"No, no, you must take them back to Ostagar, everything is set in motion and we must delay no longer."

I get a sense of foreboding suddenly. I don't like what she's implying.


	4. One of the Grey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The recruits head back to camp to become wardens and begin the battle to end the blight before it's begun. Even Elise thinks the kings plan sounds a little too easy. will this battle be like every other?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always the characters and background belong to bioware. some in game dialog that is pertinent to the story.

We head back to camp and to Duncan. "Did you get everything?" He asks

I hand him the vials and Alistair hands him the treaties. "About those," he said as he handed them over. "An old woman had them." 

"One of the wilding folk?" 

"I think they were apostates." 

"I know you were trained as Templar Alistair but it's not our business to interfere, we aren't overseen by the chantry." 

"Yes Duncan." I wondered why he was seemingly uneasy about them. They were minding their own business, in fact Morrigans mother had done us a favour. 

"Let's get to the joining," Duncan said. "The mages have been been preparing the ritual." We walked up to part of the fort I'd first met Alistair, the mages stirred in the vials of darkspawn blood we collected into a chalice with some other liquid. "These words are spoken at the beginning of the ritual and were spoken at the time of the first blight. Alistair if you would." 

"Of course Duncan.. Join us brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry out the duty that cannot be forsworn. And should you perish, know your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day we will join you." 

Daveth step forward. He takes the chalice and drinks from it. I watch in fascinated horror as he doubles up screaming holding his head, he then stands his eyes going white and he falls to the floor clutching his throats gasping for breath. 

"I'm sorry Daveth." 

"Makers Breath," said Ser Jory backing himself into the corner of the ruins.

"There is no turning back," Duncan tells Ser Jory advancing on him. 

"I have a wife, a child," he says holding out his sword in order to keep Duncan back. "If I had known." 

"There is no turning back." Duncan repeats himself handing the chalice to Alistair and drawing his sword. 

"There is no glory in this." Ser jory says taking a defensive stance and looking like a caged Animal. I watch rooted unable to move or speak as the scene plays out before me. Jory bats away Duncan's attempt to relieve him of his sword and parrys again when Duncan tries to disarm him. But the second time Duncan is too quick for him and as he parry's his sword Duncan had driven his dagger in his heart. I look to Jory and then to Duncan who nods at Alistair. "The joining is not yet complete." 

Alistair hands me the chalice his fingers momentarily entwining with mine a pleading expression on his face. I nod and slowly lift the chalice to my lips drinking from it. Not wanting the same fate as Jory and silently praying I didn't end up like Daveth. I awake in a tent Alistair by my side. "Thank the maker," he sighed. "Duncan said you'd be fine but I had to check." 

"I'm fine I reassured him. I can't believe Ser Jory though." 

"He didn't give Duncan a choice." 

"I understand the need for secrecy Alistair but you have to admit there could have been a better way. Would you run someone through for being afraid?" 

He looked away, "no I don't think I could." 

"What's done is done I suppose." 

"If you had known would you still have joined?" 

"Alistair I'm only here because circumstances meant I had no choice. It was meant to be Roland. My father would never have allowed it even if I would have wanted too." 

"So how come your here?" 

"I told my father I'd become a warden when Duncan helped me escape." 

At that Duncan came into the tent. "Your up, Good, I'm pleased that you survived, though I had no doubts you would." 

"Oh, thank you," I tell him, I'm unsure what to think about that considering I knew I was his first choice. 

"Are you able to stand? Usually we'd give you more time to rest but the King requires our presence." 

"Right yes, I believe I can manage. Has there been any word of Fergus yet?" 

"I haven't seen him, I can go look if you like whilst you go with Duncan." Alistair says 

"Aren't you coming?" 

"Oh, Cailan and Loghain won't want me there." 

"Why does he want me there?" 

"He asked for you specifically." 

I look at Alistair and then Duncan quizzically. They both shrug their shoulders, Duncan heads out saying I can meet him there and not to take too long. 

"Could I ask another favour?" 

"Oh, yes of course." 

"Could you get ser woof a lot. I'd rather have him with us when we go into battle." 

"Of course." 

"Thank you." 

He leaves the tent and me to my thoughts. "Best get on with it," I say out loud pushing myself up from the camp bed. I am slightly unsteady on my feet, probably from the after effects of the joining but as Duncan says there is no time to recover properly. I make my way to where Duncan and Cailan are standing. He turns and gives me a bow which I return. "Duncan tells me you are now a warden." 

"Yes your majesty." 

"I'm sure your father would have been proud." 

"I'm sure he would."

"Now because we have not yet found your brother and I'm afraid I cannot give you leave to do so being that the battle will soon commence, the best I can do is keep you out of the front lines." 

"Your majesty?" 

"Your father wouldn't have sent you here if he'd had a choice. I can't have the remaining Cousland dying on the front lines." 

"That's very gracious of you your majesty but I volunteered to be a warden." 

He cuts me off mid-sentence. "Duncan has informed me of the situation."

"Has he now." I look over at Duncan who has a neutral expression on his face. 

"Also Alistair will aide you."

"How?" 

"I'm sending him with you." 

"Alistair is a capable fighter your majesty. But I'm not defenseless."

"I don't want Alistair on the front lines either, he'll protect you and I ask you look out for him." I get the impression that he wants to say something else but Loghain shows up.

"Your Majesty, I insist you are further away from the front in this battle." 

"I stand by the wardens Loghain. The men will see their king leading them not cowering in the background." 

"Just like your father," muttered Loghain. "You put far to much faith in these grey wardens," he says giving Duncan a withering look. 

They bicker for several minutes before Cailan concedes and turns to discussing loghain's plan. I'm not really listening and have let my mind wander as I gaze about the ruins, I'm brought back to attention by the king. "Lady Cousland, our newest recruit and Alistair shall light the beacon." 

"I have men that can do it. It's not an arduous task." 

"Then it can be left to our newest grey wardens to carry out the task." 

Loghain muttered to himself but said nothing further. 

"That's settled then, Alistair and lady Cousland will light the beacon at the top of the tower of ishal." 

I was quite happy to go along with Cailan's plan seen as I still had to find Fergus. I didn't want to die on the front lines despite my obligation to the wardens. What caught me off guard was Cailan's request that I keep an eye on Alistair. I got the sense that he wasn't just keeping me out the battle because only I and Fergus were all that remained of the Cousland line. He wanted Alistair out the way as well. 

Alistair was far from pleased when he was told. "What I'm not to be part of the battle? I'm not going to be with you? I'm to be kept out of this as well?" 

"You sound like a petulant child Alistair." 

"What?" He gave me a incredulous look. 

"The king asked that we light the beacon personally, I'd say he is keeping me out of the battle more than you, he's sending you with me as a form of protection."

"Why would he do that?" 

"There are reasons I'm not willing to go into now." 

"So it's not that he wants the keep me out of the battle." 

"Why would he?" 

"No reason," he said in a tone that said just the opposite. 

There was a reason but the king never said. Maybe he was going to before we were interrupted, Alistair knew from the mutinous look he was giving Duncan. "It's an important job Alistair, we will see you after the battle." He went to turn away and walk towards where the men were gathering with the king. 

"Duncan," Alistair called after him. "Maker watch over you." 

"Maker watch over us all," he said and disappeared. 

Alistair was quiet for our walk up to the tower. Only answering questions on the directions and what he thinks we'd find there. He wasn't really willing to discuss anything else and kept responding to my questions with let's just get to the tower and light the beacon. As we neared the tower one of the circle mages ran out, "the tower has been overrun." 

We ran up the steps and saw soldiers already engaging grenlocks and hurlocks. We entered the fray, the circle Mage sending spells from a distance and covering us with a protective magical shield. Alistair and I fought steel on steel, parrying and dodging. Alistair yelled at a few soldiers to avoid the darkspawn blood getting into their mouths and not letting them bite them. 

There were 15 soldiers as well as a couple of mages and us. We all fought I threw my dagger up at a grenlocks who was shooting arrows toward a Mage and knocked him of his platform, the Mage took his place and finished him off with a lightening bolt. I retrieved my dagger after bringing my sword down on another grenlock slicing open his gut. 

"We've got to get into that tower," I shouted to Alistair who had shield bashed a hurlock and then driven his sword through it. 

After another twenty minutes of fighting we had cleared the courtyard. I surveyed the area and counted up how many wounded we had. There were two who had quite severe injuries. I sent them back to camp to have their wounds tended with 3 other men. 

The rest of us headed into the tower. We found the tower had indeed been over run, by the time we'd fought our way to the second floor we were exhausted. The next room had two ballistas and cages with war hounds. "Man those ballistas," I ordered the soldiers, "keep them off me will I release the hounds." Between the hounds and the ballistas we managed clear the room and a few small ons off it by sending in the dogs. The soldiers took the opportunity to change weapons and replace armour in the storage rooms off the main room. 

"What are the darkspawn doing here ahead of the main horde?" Alistair asked. 

"You could always tell them this is a private party and they weren't invited." 

"I don't think they care that they gate crashed." 

"You were complaining you weren't getting to fight. They must have heard you, sent some this way especially for you." 

He smirked. "Never a dull moment." 

With means woof a lot about that's an impossibility. "Are you alright? No injuries?"

"A few near misses but none so far." 

"Good me either. How much farther up have we got to go, do you know?" 

"Another flight I believe then we should be at the top." 

We walked through another door and came across a small group of grenlocks who managed to take by surprise. There was a small flight of stone stairs with a heavy wooden door. We went through single file ready for more darkspawn to be waiting. There were more stairs that opened up into a small room. At the other end of the room there was an ogre. 

"Maker," we collectively breathed. 

"We need to circle and flank it," Alistair whispered motioning positions to the mages and soldiers. It didn't appear to notice us. Once we'd taken up position the mages got its attention by shooting various magical bolts at it. It turned and began to lumber toward them. From each of our positions we ran to attack. Being hit from all sides momentarily confused the beast and it began swiping at the soldiers. One was sent flying another scooped up and chewed on. I drove my sword through its leg, it swung its arm in annoyance as if swatting away a fly. I rolled out its way and it turned to swipe me once more. This seemed to unbalance it and Alistair took advantage. Running up it he knocked it down driving his blade into its chest. I throw him my sword and he finishes it slicing across the creatures throat, black ichor bubbling forth. We check our injuries and Alistair notices I had a gash across my shoulder where the creature had caught me. 

"It's nothing I tell him. I'll have it tended too once we've lit the beacon." 

"Right the beacon, they'll be waiting on it." Alistair lights the beacon, ensuring that it is high enough to be seen from the battlefield. 

We turn to make our way back down the stairs when I feel a pain in my right shoulder. I look to find two arrows protruding from it. I swing round to see Alistair and the other soldiers being attacked from grenlocks and hurlocks. We find ourselves surrounded as they swarm up the stairs, another used its sword to parry my attack and send me flying. I crack my head on the railings and feel the sword thrust through my armour into my stomach before everything went black.


	5. Then there were two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in a place she doesn't recognise Elise and Alistair must come to terms with whats happened and decide what to do next.
> 
> As always the characters and background belong to bioware.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little longer than most as we a meeting a good portion of the characters. Some in game dialog but I tried to keep it to a minimum.

I awoke to find myself on a bed, I didn't know how I got here or even where here was.

"Ah your awake,Good."

I look round and try to sit up, The pain was intense and I wince. "Don't try to sit up too quickly, your injuries were severe. Nothing beyond mothers capabilities mind you." 

"Morrigan right? How did I get here?"

"Mother rescued you, Do you not remember?" 

"I remembered being overrun by darkspawn and everything going dark."

"Ah yes, well you have been asleep for two days straight."

"What happened to the army and the king?" 

"The man that was to respond to your signal quit the field and the darkspawn won your battle. Your companion is not taking it well."

"Lothian quit the field? He left everyone to die?" 

"Everyone who was left behind was slaughtered." 

"Alistair is alright?" 

"The suspicious dim witted one you were with before, he is outside by the fire with mother, who wanted to see you when you awoke."

I feel sick, I sit up feel a little dizzy. I'm uncertain if that's because I'm still recovering from injuries or because that's the second lot of betrayal in the last 3 weeks. Morrigan hands me my armour and helps me into it and then hands me my sword and daggers. "Thank you for helping me Morrigan, for helping both of us." 

"Oh," she looks taken aback. "Er well you are quite welcome though mother did most of the work, I'm no healer." 

"You helped."

"I..well." She looks flustered clearly not used to someone giving her praise. I walk outside to bright sunlight and shield my eyes in order to see better. Alistair is staring out across the swamp. 

Flameth notices me first. "See here if your fellow grey warden, You worry too much young man."

Alistair turns and comes up and hugs me. "You, your alive, I thought you were dead for sure." 

"Clearly it takes more than dark spawn to kill me."I say hugging him back. 

He turns away a tear in his eye. "Duncan's dead, the grey wardens even the King." He sounds distraught and I know what he's feeling. 

"I'm sorry Alistair, I know what it feels like to lose everyone you care about." 

"It doesn't seem real.. if it wasn't for Morrigan's mother."

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here lad."

I turn to Flemeth . "I believe we have you to thank for our rescue and recovery."

"I apologise,"said Alistair "but you never told us your name so..." 

"What's in a name?" She asked. "The chasined folk call me Flemeth."

"The Flemeth, like the legend."

"Ah, it makes sense now," I say partly to myself but loud enough for her to hear. 

"Does it now?" She looks at me shrewdly

"Yes, you knew we were in trouble on top of that tower, you knew that the king would be left to die. You were expecting it." 

"What? How is that even possible Alistair asked mouth gaping."

"She is no ordinary Mage." 

She laughed, "your companion is very sharp, I'd keep hold of this one if I were you." 

I look at Alistar and back at flemeth, "now wait a minute." 

She laughs again, "I'd take solace where I'm offered it if I were you. It's going to be a long and difficult journey, there will be many difficult decisions." 

I wasn't particular happy to have my future predicted by this witch if that was indeed what she was and I didn't particularly like the ominous tone either. "Why did you save us anyway?"

"Well we can't have all the grey wardens dying at once, It has always been the grey wardens who have united the lands and stopped the blight. They are the only ones who can." 

"But how Duncan was our leader and he's dead?"Asks Alistair

"You are grey wardens are you not? I'm sorry for your loss but duty must come first or the horde will have won and the whole of thedas will be swallowed up by darkspawn."

"I guess it's up to us,"I turn to Alistair. "Any suggestions where we begin?" 

"Why are you asking me?"

"You're the senior warden here."

"Well we could go to Arl Eamon for help, I know him. He's a good man, He will be the first to ask for Loghain's execution when he finds out what he's done."

"What about those treaties? Do you still have them?"

"Yes,Duncan gave them before we went to the tower." 

"This Arl Eamon and your treaties sound like the making of an army to me." Said Flemeth. 

"So do you think we can do this?"Alistair asked

"Isn't that what grey wardens are famous for? I ask we don't have a lot of options, unless you intend on sitting here for the duration of the blight."

"What! No." 

"Glad to hear it, because I need you if we are going to this."

"You do?" He looked hopeful for a moment. Alistair reminded me of a lost puppy. I look around remembering I hadn't seen ser wool a lot. "Where's ser woof a lot?" I ask

"The mabari ran off as soon as I collected you from the top of the tower." Flemeth said. "I imagine he'll find you soon enough." 

"I can only hope he does, at least he's alive."

Alistair momentarily distracted from his grief asked. "What did you call him?"

"See woof a lot. I reply. "He barked incessantly as a puppy and it kind of stuck."

Alistair grinned and I saw this twinkle in his eyes like a small boy finding mischief. It reminded me of Roland and the times we used to get each other into trouble. I turned away suddenly and bit down into my lip so as to stop myself crying. A movement not lost on Alistair. "Are you ok? Are you in pain?" 

His concern made it harder for me to keep control. Thankfully Morrigan chose that moment to come out and ask if we were staying for supper or it would just be her and her mother. The look she gave when Flemeth told her she was coming with us was enough to make me shake off the oncoming tears and laugh instead. "We don't bite," I told her, "well not that way anyway." Alistair and Morrigan both looked at me, one with raised eyebrows and the other with a smirk. "I'm not planning on bedding anyone either if that's what you were thinking." 

Alistair flushed and rubbed his hand across his neck. I watch him as he gets flustered and tries to brush it off. "Oh, No, We weren't, no one was thinking that they were going to bed you, not that you aren't bedable. Maker!"

I laugh as does Morrigan. "Your cute when your flustered." He flushes deeper and coughs "I'll just wait over here," he says.

"She'll be safe with us I say to Flemeth."

She nods her head. "I believe I am right about you." 

"Have I no say in this?"she asks

"You've been itching to get out of the wilds for ages."

"But, I'm not ready and it's not how I wanted this."

"The blight affects everyone you and I included."

"I understand,"she said with a sigh. "let me just fetch my things." She comes back out with a pack slung across her back and her staff in hand. "There's a village not far from here, I suggest that we go there first for supplies." 

"Seen as Alistair and I have nothing but that which we arrived with that's a good plan." 

"Is this such a good idea?"Alistair asked

"We need all the help we can get remember."

"Yes alright." He muttered. 

We make our way out of the wilds and onto the main road. We hear barking in the distance and a bloodied mabari comes running up to me. Ser woof a lot, I crouch down and check him over but can't find any injuries and the blood is still wet. Behind him comes running a few grenlocks and hurlocks which between the four of us dispatch easily. Alistair pummelling a hurlock with his shield before driving his sword through, Morrigan freezing the other hurlock and firing a lightening bolt at it causing it to shatter. Ser woof a lot jumps on a grenlock and rips out its throat and I drive both my daggers into the last grenlock. "Are you alright boy?" I ask him when we are done. 

He gives me a happy bark. I ruffle his fur and pet him, "we need to find a stream to wash you in." He whines at me but this time I want to be sure he's not injured "It's the only way I can be sure none of that blood is yours."He puts his head down and whines again. "No use sulking." 

"Are you going to do that to Alistair if he needs a bath?" Morrigan asked a wicked grin on her face. 

"If I think he needs it," I say winking at her. 

"What are you two giggling at?"he asks. 

"My hound amongst other things" Morrigan sniggers again. 

He carries on trailing behind us. I look over my shoulder and think that I need to do something to keep him from dwelling on Duncan's death, I'm not sure why he's taken Calins death so hard, he didn't seem the type who was devoted to the king. I fall back and start to walk behind with him. "So Duncan said you were a Templar?" 

"I hadn't taken my vows, I just trained as one. My heart was never in it though, It wasn't my choice to join the chantry." He said it almost bitterly. 

"What happened?" 

"I was sent to the chantry when I was ten." 

"Younger son In the family sent off to do your duty for the family?"

"What? No nothing like that." 

"It's not unusual. Most don't want to go either. Roland didn't want to come to be fathers squire either." 

"Roland?" 

"Er, I mean ser Gilmore, was a knight in my fathers service he.." I stopped and gritted my teeth to stop myself crying. 

"Are you ok?"He asked suddenly concerned 

"I just need a minute."I composed myself again and said "we were talking about you not me."

"I'd rather talk about you." 

"I need you to talk about you," I tell him, "take my mind off everything. Please." I realise I sound like I'm begging but I can't cope with even thinking about Roland or my parents right now. I need to keep focused and if that means getting my companions to talk about themselves then so be it. 

"Anything to help a fellow warden I suppose." He said trying to be chirpy, "Well I'm a bastard And before you say anything, the fatherless kind. Arl Eamon took me in and raised me. He wasn't my father," he hurriedly added. I say nothing but let him continue.

"Anyway everything was fine till he married this orlesian woman, it was frowned on of course being that the war with the orlesians was still fresh in everyone's memory. But he loved her and that was that. She didn't like that I was there and that Eamon had taken me in. The rumours were I was his son. So as soon as I was old enough she had me shipped off to the chantry."

"Oh Alistair, I'm sorry. That's an awful thing to happen to a child." 

"I don't blame Eamon. I was petulant and quite a brat. He came to visit me but I was awful to him and he eventually stopped coming."

I impulsively hug him. It's not like I could have changed his past But I can see that small boy lost and afraid and angry and not having anyone there for him, unlike Roland who had me. When Roland arrived at the castle he was much like Alistair. Lost, afraid, upset. Then he saw me and I smiled at him and asked his name and father let me show him around and he didn't feel quite as alone after that. I was going to make sure he never felt alone but instead I left him. Left him to die he was alone, I'd left him alone. I stifled a cry but the tears were already falling and nothing was going to stop them. Alistair pulled me in closer and just let me cry. Morrigan turned wondering why we'd stopped and walked back towards us. She stopped short when she realised I was the one crying. 

"What's wrong with her?" She asked 

Alistair shook his head. "She asked me to tell her about myself and then burst into tears." 

"I can see how you'd have that effect," she rustles in her pack and pulls out a bottle she uncorks it and wafts it under my nose "Drink this,"she says The smell makes me pull back. "What is that?" 

"It will help,"is all she says. 

"It could be poison,"said Alistair. Morrigan gives him a filthy look and crosses her arms. 

"I doubt flemeth sent Morrigan with us to kill us off as soon as we're out of sight." I eye the bottle and try to work out the contents, I recognise the concoction. Nan had given me something similar when my parents had first split Roland and I up. I drink the potion and have a familiar sensation of calm wash over me, it wasn't as potent as the one nan had as hers knocked me out. 

"Are you alright?" asked Alistair. 

"Of course she's alright. If I wanted to do away with you I could have just frozen you or zapped you with lightening." 

"Right,very comforting" 

"She has a point," I tell him "besides I know what this potion is. I've had it before."

"You have?" 

"Yes, nan gave me something a lot stronger when I was younger though that knocked me out." 

"Oh"

"Yes and you wouldn't want to have to carry me to the village." 

"Oh,well, erm I suppose not." He said flushing slightly. 

"He's hoping you will, so he can," Morrigan laughed. 

"Let's just get to this village shall we?"I say to save Alistair's blushes and Morrigan from winding him up. We reach the village of lothering a few hours later I'm emotionally drained and physically exhausted. So when we come upon a group of bandits demanding payment to enter, my patience is non existent. 

"Do we look like simple travelers to you?" 

"Er boss, maybe we should just let them through his companion says."

"No there's a bridge toll. Everyone has to pay it regardless of who they are."

I flip a dagger in my hand and step forward with a menacing grin. "Are you sure you want to continue?" 

The leader takes a step backwards. Alistair notices one of the bandits holding a shield, A shield belonging to the knights of Redcliffe. "Where did you get that?"He said nodding his head towards the shield. 

"We took it from a dead Templar who wouldn't pay the toll."

That was the wrong thing to say, Alistair drew his sword. "Andraste's flaming knickers," I hissed "this is all we need, seems my good friend here recognises the shield your carrying and the news you've murdered someone who he may have known has upset him." I cast a glance at Alistair and he certainly looks angry. 

"Look," the leader says, "we're only trying to make a living."

"From stripping refugees of their goods?" 

Morrigan chooses that moment to turn herself into a giant spider and run up to the men who start to run after dropping their possessions. I laugh as she chases after them a little way to the cries of she'll eat us. She turns back to normal and comes up with a grin on her face. "I don't think they'll be back in a hurry."

"That was deliciously evil," I say to her and they deserved it. 

She raised her eyebrow and then gave a little bow. "You are quite welcome."

"Travelling with you is going to be fun I can tell." 

"Oh great,"mutters Alistair. "You go right ahead and encourage her." 

"You remind me so much of him in little ways,"I say almost to myself. 

"Of who?" he asks. 

"Roland." 

"Is that a good thing?" 

I smile at him, "a very good thing." 

He smiles back at me and I think that he is very handsome and very like Cailan in looks. We walk down the steps and Alistair stops. "Lothering," he says "pretty as a picture." 

"Are you alright Alistair?" I ask. 

"Decided not to fall on your sword then?" Asks Morrigan. 

Alistair glares at her. "I'm just coming to terms with the fact I'll never see Duncan again."

"Your still in shock it's understandable. I didn't know Duncan very well but I owe him my life." 

Morrigan throws her hands in the air and starts to walk off. "She's such a bitch," he says. 

I can't help but laugh at the look on his face. "I'm sorry but the look you gave her." He smiles sheepishly. "People handle things in different ways. Maybe flemeth has brought her up not to be reliant on anyone."

"I hadn't thought of that. " He mused. "What about these treaties have you read them?"

"Only that we need to see the Dwarves in Orzammar, The circle of magi and the Dalish."

"I still think Arl Eamon would be our best option and maybe we should head there first."

"I'd like to see if there is any news first, if you don't mind. I want to find out if anyone has heard anything about Fergus. We didn't find him out in the wilds where we were."

"Of course,"Alistair said. "I understand."

We caught up with Morrigan and headed into the Village. A Templar stopped us and asked us to move on as they had no more room for refugees. We are just looking for information I told him and any news of my brother. We won't be staying long. "Do you have much trouble with Bandits?" I asked 

"Makers mercy, they back again? How many times do we have to drive them off." 

"One less. We drove them off ourselves.. well Morrigan did. I doubt they'll be coming back again."

"If that is so then I thank you my lady,"he said bowing to her. 

"I er... "she looked stunned as she'd never had a Templar thank her before. "Your welcome." 

As we walked towards the chantry she pulled me to one side. "You did that on purpose." 

"Did what? Tell him the truth?"

"Yes that, I don't need thanks from anyone let alone a Templar." 

"You say that but it's nice to be appreciated."

"Hmpf! I don't need thanks for anything, I didn't chase them off because I was protecting you, I did it because it amused me."

"Fine, have it your way." 

We walk further into the village and come across a family of elves looking dejected. "Are you alright I ask?" 

"The bandits on the highway robbed us of everything when we came in and no one wants to about an elf in trouble." 

"We drove them off." I tell them nodding my head in the direction we came from. "Did you have much coin on you?" 

"Only a small amount of silver my lady."

I hand them a sovereign. "Use it to travel further north and get your family to safety I tell them."

""Oh thank you my lady. We'll see if they've left any of our belongs on the bridge as well." 

"Are you going to give away all our coin?" Morrigan asked once they'd left. 

"No, but some of that money was theirs anyway. Probably all of their savings. We can make more coin selling the things we don't need. Do they look like they own enough to make anymore? ""

"That's not our problem." I rolled my eyes at Alistair who was giving Morrigan a disgusted look. I could see what she meant, we have a long way to go and needed supplies and the coin would have to last but I couldn't just not help someone who'd been robbed by those bandits and the other refugees where all banding together to help each other this family were cast aside. It wasn't right. We weren't losing too much coin by helping them. We'd taken a fair amount from the darkspawn. They must have a thing for shiny coins as I can't see them spending it. 

Later when I mentioned it in passing to Alistair and Morrigan they both said "they probably melted it down to make their armour and weapons." "Makes sense, I don't see the darkspawn as all that practical but we didn't know that much about them."

We came up to a merchant being berated by a sister of the chantry. "Don't tell me your going to interfere in this too aren't you?"

"Yes, he's a merchant." 

"At least get the harpy away from him and earn us some discount." 

After listening to both sides of the argument I suggested that he charged reasonable prices to the people already here and anyone new he charged a little extra. He still made a profit but he wasn't seen as ripping everyone else off. 

"Would that suffice sister?" I asked in a tone that said the conversation was over. 

"It will have to do." She sighed before turning on her heels and heading back into the chantry. 

"Not even a thank you. After you'd given her what she wanted."

"Not quite what she wanted Morrigan. She wanted the merchant to give it all away free or at the prices he'd bought them at. He still makes money but he's not fleecing the needy."

"Yes, quite the little negotiator." Her tone was sarcastic but her demeanour gave away that she was impressed. She tried to hide her true feelings, her sarcasm and brusque attitude was her shield to stop anyone getting too close. My father said that I unnerved people because I could see through them. It had put Roland at a disadvantage as I didn't really give him a chance to pluck up the courage to tell me how he felt. I could tell every time I looked at him and saw him looking at me. I forced myself to push all thoughts of Roland to the back of my mind. We needed supplies and the merchant was shifting about uncomfortably at my gaze.

"We need supplies," I said a little more brusquely than I intended. 

"I've not got much but you can see what I have," he opened a couple of chests beside him and we rummaged through them for any potions or weapons or armour that looked like it was in a better state than our own. I haggled a price by using outright flattery and flirting with him till it was a price I felt was agreeable to us both and then sold him other equipment we didn't need for a fair price or at least a fair price for him. 

Morrigan had what I can only describe as an evil grin. "What?"

"Your manipulation of men rivals my mother."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"Maybe mother was right to send me after all." 

"I'm glad I amuse you."

"Oh you do. I can't wait to see what you do next."

"I didn't strip off and let him have his way with me." /p>

"I can imagine Alistair's turning scarlet if you had. However between your tone and running your hands over him in a very provocative way I'm surprised he managed to contain his erection." 

"He was rather in a hurry to see to other business," I laughed. "He got a thrill and a good price and so did we." 

"Considering the amount of coin you got from him I'd say we got a better price than he did."

"You make that sound like it's a bad thing." 

"No,no it's amusing to watch you." 

We head to the chantry and speak to the Templar standing guard outside. "Are you the only ones left to guard the village?" 

"Since the Teyrn came and took all his men and anyone else who could fight to denerim."

,And what happens to lothering when the darkspawn head this way?"

"We are hoping to have everyone evacuated in the next few days. In the meantime we will have to cope as best we can." 

"Then Maker watch over you. Knowing that a handful of templars wouldn't be able to stop the horde."

"Thank you my lady."

Inside we wait till the knight captain ser Maron has finished speaking to the group of refugees. "I hope you aren't seeking sanctuary as well,"he said wearily. "We full to the brim as it is."

I hold my hand up. "No we can make camp further up. I was looking for information actually." 

"I will answer what I can. "

"I'm actually looking for someone and wondered if you've perhaps seen them." I describe Fergus in detail and the disappointment must show when he says he's seen no one matching that description. "He was with the kings army you say? Could he have fallen at Ostagar?"

"No. he hadn't come back from scouting the wilds when the battle call came." 

"You were there?"

"We are grey wardens."

"Ah, I'm afraid you won't find many friendly to you here and maybe not mention it to Reverend mother." 

"We had no part in what happened. The king was betrayed, all wardens fell in that battle. We happened to be incapacitated at the time." 

"I don't believe the grey wardens would do any of the things the Teyrn had suggested. He left us to fend for ourselves after taking every other able bodied man to fight so I have little love for the regent." 

"I'm sorry we can't stop long enough to help you, But we need to find a way to end this blight." 

He bowed crossing his hands over his chest as he did so. "I cannot openly support you," he said passing me a key "but take what you need from the cabinet at the back." 

"Thank you, you are most kind." We went to the cabinet and took out a great sword and a bow n arrows before locking the cabinet again and handing the Key back to ser Maron. I went to leave when Alistair spotted a knight from Redcliffe. "Ser Donall?" He asked 

"Alistair?" The knight asked "is that really you? So different from the small boy, covered in mud running around Arl Eamons estate 

Alistair looked suitably embarrassed and I grin picturing a small boy, falling in the dirt getting into mischief the same way Roland and I used to. A pain suddenly hit me and I felt like retching. Alistair put his arm round me as I doubled up. "Are you alright?" he asked, "maybe you should sit down." 

"You are looking rather pale." Morrigan says 

They sit me on a pew and I put my head in my hands. I cannot allow myself to think about them, I have to be stronger than this, I cannot let this grief defeat me. Alistair sat beside me in silence, His presence was calming. He didn't need to say anything, He had lost just as much as I had, He understood. After a few minutes I put my hand on his. "I'll be alright now. It's passed, I'm sorry if I worried you." 

He smiled at me and I was again reminded of king Cailan. "You've had a long day, Maybe we should make camp and you can rest." 

"Maybe that would be for the best." 

"I just want to say goodbye to ser Donal." 

"Oh wait," I rummage around in my pocket and beckon the knight over.  
"I apologise for not being able to stand at this current moment." 

"Are you quite well my lady?" 

"Just in need of some rest. We chased off bandits on the road, they had a shield and we found this on a Templar. I handed him the note and the amulet." 

"Ser Henric?" 

"I'm sorry." 

"I was too meet him here, that's who I was waiting for. It seems this hunt for the sacred ashes has turned into a wild goose chase." 

"What exactly are you wanting the ashes for?" 

"Arl Eamon is gravely Ill, our only hope is the ashes. I was hoping to find out some information here but instead have found nothing." 

"Ser Henric mentions Denerim and brother Genetivi?" 

"It was brotherGgenetivi who wrote about them and had done considerable research. We believe he was going looking for them." 

"Are you going to go to denerim?" 

"No, I've wasted enough time on this fool quest, I will return to Redcliffe and let them know what has happened." 

"How Ill is Eamon?" I ask

"We do not know how long he will last." 

"That bad?" Asked Alistair. "But how did this happen?" 

"We believe he was poisoned." 

"What!" 

"I do not know all the details but I must hurry back to the castle." 

"Yes of course," I bow to him as much as I can still sat down and him to us, As he leaves Alistair begins pacing.  
I grab his hand to get him to stop. He looks at me, he looks worn out and stricken. There is more to this story than Eamon taking him in. "We have our destination I tell him, We find the ashes and take them to the Arl." 

"If he's that ill." 

"All the more reason to get on it then my dear Alistair." 

He smiles. "Your in charge." 

"First rest." 

It was a fitful night.dreams of the Horde and then a huge black dragon breathing green fire. I awoke startled. 

Alistair came over and sat down beside me. "I heard you thrashing about." He said. "That's the Arch demon." 

"The Dragon?" 

"Yes. Part of having drank the taint is that we can hear them you see, Some after a while even say they can understand it." 

"These dreams going to happen often?" 

"You eventually block it out." 

"I'd rather dream about that than relive the horrors that brought me here in the first place." 

"How did you end up with Duncan? Didn't you say ser Gilmore was going to be chosen?" 

"Ser Gilmore was a knight in my father's service. Duncan was going to test him and see if he was suitable, I have no doubt he would be, would have been." I corrected myself. "Then Howe betrayed my family, Under the guise of friendship he came to our home, told my father that his men had been delayed, instead they attacked the castle whilst we slept. He had everyone murdered, My mother stayed behind to give me more time to escape and Roland he he." I began to cry again. "He with the other men barricaded the main door to stop Howes men getting in and gave us the chance to escape. He sacrificed himself for me. I shouldn't have left him alone, I promised him he'd never be alone again and I left him." 

"If you hadn't you'd be dead." 

"I know, I know it makes no sense, But I left him and my parents to Howes mercy, I can't even think about the things he did to them before they died." Alistair put his arm around me and let me cry myself to sleep. I woke several hours later my head on his lap. "I'm sorry," I told him. "I seem to be making it a habit of crying all over you." 

"I don't mind, I feel like crying at times too." 

"You can cry over me anytime Alistair." 

"I'll remember that." He then smiles at me. 

I suddenly feel butterflies. Why am I feeling like this? Because he smiled? I do love his smile, This is ridiculous I've known him a week. How can I possibly be infatuated? 

Just as we are packing up we are attacked by bandits, clearly thought we were easy targets More fool them. I grabbed my sword and swung it slicing through ones midriff. Morrigan froze two in place Alistair Bashed them with his shield sending them flying the rest decided to flee leaving the unconscious and wounded to tend to themselves. We headed towards the area they came from and I took a flying leap and drove my daggers into another of them catching him by surprise. Alistair batted away the arrows with his shield and cut another in half whilst Morrigan paralysed the archer whilst ser woof a lot finished him off wrestling him to the ground going for the jugular. I wiped off my blade before sheathing it and put away my daggers. 

"Really before breakfast?" I quipped. 

Alistair chuckled and Morrigan smirked. "How very dare they." Alistair said. "Let's head back to the tavern see if they serve breakfast." 

However when we got there. "They're Loghain's men." Alistair said in a lowered tone, "this can't be good." 

"Weren't we asking all morning about a woman matching this description?" One said to the other. 

"It seems we were lied too." 

A young woman maybe a couple of years older than myself interrupted. "Gentlemen there is surely no need for trouble, these are surely more poor souls seeking refuse." 

They are more than that, stay out of this sister if you protect these traitors you'll get the same as them. 

"Traitors? Your Teryn is a traitor, your teryn is the one who left Calien to die on the battlefield with the rest of the wardens." 

"You will pay for that." 

"If you wish to die, I will gladly grant it." I drove my sword through the chain mail of one of the soldiers . Another soldiers sword swung down aiming to hit me but Alistair got in the way and his shield took the the blow whilst he thrust his sword into his side. Yet another soldier was bearing down on Morrigan when he fell forwards two daggers in his back. I turned to see the chantry sister kick another's knees out before disappearing and reappearing next to the soldier who had the daggers in his back. She retrieved them with a swift movement and was about to take on another when their leader gave up. 

"Stop!" he yelled." We surrender." 

"Good we can all stop fighting now," the lay sister said. 

"Tell Loghain, the wardens know the truth and we are coming for him." 

"I will," he says dragging the rest of his men who could stand out of the door. I step off the wounded soldiers and turn to the barman. 

"Do you have anything to tend their wounds with?" 

"You're going to help them after they started it?" Morrigan asked incredulously. 

"No, they can help themselves, but I don't want to pay for the clean up of the dead." 

"Oh." 

I turn to the lay sister. "Quite handy with those daggers." I say giving her an appraising look. 

"I'm better with a bow." 

"Where did you learn to fight like that?" 

"I wasn't always a cloistered sister," she says. "My name is Leliana and I apologise for interrupting but I couldn't stand by and not help". 

"Help is always welcome." 

"You are a grey warden yes? Those men said you were a grey warden. That means you are going to stop the blight, that's what grey wardens do isnt it."

"That's the plan. Of course we have an army to gather." 

"Then I'm coming with you." 

"If your volunteering it saves me asking for your assistance and I'm certainly glad of the help but may I ask why?" 

"The Maker told me too join you, surely he would not have done so without good reason." 

"How exactly did the maker instruct you to join us?" 

"In my dreams." She says simply. 

"Well you can tell me all about these dreams of yours when we hit the road." 

"Eurgh, you must have hit your head harder than mother thought." 

"As much as I hate to agree with the bitch," Alistair said quietly. "But don't you think we have enough crazy already with her," nodding his head in Morrigans direction. 

"Nowhere near enough," I tell him. "We need more than this if we are going to take on an arch demon which in itself sounds pretty crazy." 

"Hmm you may have a point." 

"Didn't we come in here for food?" Morrigan asked. 

Leliana takes us to her table and orders food and I listen to Alistair and Morrigan bait each other. I find it oddly relaxing, It's like having bickering siblings around me. There was only Fergus and I and we were close. We didn't really bicker, because he was much older, I used to follow him and his friends around and they would do mock battles and archery competitions. Fergus even took the blame a few times when Roland and I would pull . pranks on the soldiers. The closest thing to sibling rivalry was Roland till we turned 15. Leliana begins telling me of a captured Quanari who was being held for murder.

"Did they have to hunt him down?" 

"No," she says, "that's the strange things he gave himself up. Didn't resist." 

"Really? I think I want a chat with this Quanari." 

"I can take you too him if you like, I'm curious as to why you would want too speak to a murderer." 

"The grey wardens take people from all backgrounds. They can atone for whatever their crimes by serving as a warden." 

"You'd make him a warden?" 

"I don't have the ability to make him a warden, I want to speak to him and then decide whether we take him with us or leave him." Leliana gave me a puzzled look, but any further thoughts she kept to herself. 

We headed out after thanking the landlord for his help. Alistair walked next to me in companionable silence and for the first time in the past few weeks I felt like everything was going to work out. We came to the cage Leliana was talking about and I looked at a man about a foot taller than Alistair. He looked resigned to his fate, He showed no emotion when he looked at me. What I wondered what it was that drove this man to murder a family. If that is indeed how it happened, Villages did after all love the rumour mill. 

"He's big isn't he," remarked Alistair. 

"So are you."

"Not as big as he is." 

"Don't worry Alistair your the right size for me." 

"I am?" He blushed, leliana giggled and Morrigan made a disgusted noise. I looked around them all. "Oh did I say that out loud." 

Leliana winked at me whilst Morrigan groaned. "Can we get on with it? Why is he in a cage like an animal." 

"I'm about to find out." I walk right up to the cage and look him in the eye. "So you're a quanari." 

"You are not one of my captors," he says. "I will not amuse you anymore than I have the other humans. Please leave me in peace." 

"I was told you murdered an entire family is that true?" 

"It is, I am sten of the beresaad, I am the vanguard of the quanari people." 

"I am Elise, can I ask why you murdered an entire family?" 

"It doesn't matter now I won't last much longer. My death will atone for my actions." 

"What if there was another way to atone?" 

"And what does your wisdom say is equal to my crime." 

"We are needing people to stop the blight". 

"You are a grey warden then. Surprising." 

"Why is that surprising?" 

"My people have heard legends of the grey wardens strength and skill, though I suppose not every legend is true." 

"Never judge people on appearances," I tell him. "I need people to help, If you are willing to accompany us and fight the darkspawn, I will talk to the reverend mother about your release." 

"It would be an acceptable way to atone for my actions." 

"I will be back shortly." 

We head back to the chantry and speak to the reverend mother. "It's good to see you Leliana. She says who are these with you?" 

"These travellers are wardens your reverence." 

"Grey wardens? Then I must ask you too leave.."

"I didn't let her finish, We will not be stopping long, but what you've heard is not true and is a wrong I intend to put right." 

"Very well," she said. "Then why are you here?" 

"About the quanari, you have locked up. I'd like you to release him too my custody." 

"You want me to release him m into your custody? And what about justice for the family he murdered?" 

"There is more than just dying in a cage starving as a way to atone." 

"What do you have to say to this Leliana?" 

"These are strange times your reverence, I believe that coming with us he can do some good and atone for what he has done." 

"So you are going with this woman and her companions then?" 

"I feel that the maker has brought her here for a reason and" 

"Say no more leliana. I trust your judgement," She handed her a key, "I place the prisoner in your care." 

"Thank you your reverence, your trust is not displaced." 

We headed back to the cage where Sten was staring stoney faced out to the north. I indicated to leliana to unlock the cage, Sten looked stunned. 

"She agreed to it?" 

"She agreed to release you into our custody." 

"Very well, I will follow you on your quest, And I will not leave till I die or we have been victorious." 

"Let's try and avoid the dying part shall we? We need to get you some Armour, I'll give you this great sword we got from the Templars, It will do for now"

He nodded his head, took the sword and put it over his shoulder. I could go back and ask for his equipment but he was reluctant and I didn't really want to turn up at the chantry again. We'd already dealt with chanters board missives. Earned a good bit of coin doing so, hopefully we'd find a merchant who had armour to fit sten. 

We headed out of Lothering and heard yells as we reached the highway. "Darkspawn," Alistair and I said together. A dwarf was shouting at them to stay back and another was cowering near a crate. The older dwarf was clearly trying to protect him and had a lot of courage standing his ground. It was a little strange that they were making no attempt to go near the cowering boy. It was if they were afraid of him. There were several grenlocks and a couple of hurlocks. I suspected they were scouting the area.  
Morrigan had already hexed them leliana had thrown a dagger into the eye of one causing it to drop its weapon whilst it nursed its eye. Sten lost no time swinging the sword in an arc down on a hurlock with such force he cleaved it in two. Alistair dispatched the other hurlock and between us we mopped up the remaining grenlocks. 

"Mighty timely arrival there my friend I'm much obliged." 

"You're welcome" 

"Bodan Fiddic is the name, merchant and entrepreneur, this is my boy sandel. Say hello" 

"Hello" 

"He doesn't say much my boy but he helps me a great deal." 

"Merchant? You wouldn't happen to have armour to fit my companion here would you?" 

"If you wouldn't mind helping us clear up the mess I'm sure I can find something that's suitable." 

We help Bodan right his cart and pick up his goods, with much grumbling from Morrigan. He finds us some armour to fit sten, for which he nods in thanks. 

"He's not a great talker either," I tell Bodan.

"Whereabouts are you headed? We may be headed in the same direction." 

"You're welcome to come along, though I'd recommend staying out the way once any fighting breaks out." 

"You're formidable folk to have around on the road so I'll be pleased to take you up on your kind offer." 

So our little band make our way up the highway heading for Denerim and brother Genetivi house.


	6. Journey to Denerim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having decided to find out about the sacred ashes, the group make their way to denerim. Alistair however is in a hurry to get to Redcliffe and Elise wants to find out why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always the characters and background belongs to bioware.

We'd walked for three days and were quite a distance from denerim. Bodan's cart couldn't take us all either so progress was slower than I would have liked. "I opt we confiscate the next bandits horses we come across," I say to Alistair "unless. Morrigan what animals can you shape shift into?" 

"No, you are not riding me," she replied guessing what I was thinking. 

"I'm not that heavy."

"I'm not here to carry you."

"It was worth asking." I winked at leliana who wasn't sure whether I was joking or being serious till then. 

"Eamon will have horses we can use."

"That means going in the other direction from where we are now." 

"Surely it wouldn't be that much out of our way."

"Didn't that knight say the Arl was gravely ill and needed the ashes to recover? What would be the point going there if we won't get to see him." 

"What if he dies before we get there?"

"There's no guarantees he won't die if we do Alistair. Why are you in such a hurry to see him? What is he too you exactly?"

"What do you mean?"

"He was more than a guardian or someone who took you in if your this anxious. Or are you suddenly worried you won't have the chance to apologise for being an obnoxious brat as a child?" 

Alistair shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. "I owe him a lot that's all."

"You owe him? He takes you in and then because his orliesan wife demands it hands you over to the chantry." 

"It's more complicated than that?"

"Explain it too me then." 

"I don't want to"

"Why?" 

"Because It's not important."

"Clearly it is if you keep dropping hints about getting to Eamon. Don't you think we can do this?"

"It's not that. Eamon has more experience."

"In what fighting darkspawn? I think you have the edge there."

"What! no. In battle, in leading an army." 

"And I don't?"

"You aren't as old as Eamon." 

"Because age has everything to do with leading an army. Didn't King Maric lead an Army when he was about your age? Cailan was about the same age as my brother." I notice him flinch when I mention both Maric and Cailan. I suspect I know whose bastard son he is but he's not going to admit it and for some reason he wants someone else to take the responsibility so he doesn't have to. "do you want to lead?"

"What! no. I'd be a terrible leader,"he tries to lighten the mood. "I'd get us lost." But I'm not in the mood for his joking about, his ability to evade questions is astonishing. It's also annoyed me that he doesn't seem to trust me after he put me in charge in the first place. I decide to find somewhere to camp for the night and then as everyone is setting up there tents and Alistair is making a fire, I whistle ser woof a lot.

"Where are you going he asks?"

"I need to go for a walk, alone!" I empathise. 

"What if there are darkspawn? Or bandits?" 

"I've managed to handle myself up to now," I say more abruptly than I intended. He looks taken aback and I suddenly feel slightly guilty as I walk off. No I'm too infuriated with Alistair right now. I walk for about twenty mins and come across a stream. Their are fish jumping about in it and i spend a further hour fashioning a spear out of a tree branch and using it to fish. It's peaceful, the only sound is the rustling of the trees and the bubbling of the water. I decide that ser woof a lot could do with a bath but the only way I'm going to get him in the water is by getting in myself. So I strip to my underclothes and get in the calling ser woof a lot who jumps in cascading water over me. 

Washing woof a lot was not without its difficulties. He jumped about so much more often than not I'd end face first under water. The second time it happened I felt a hand pull me back up. "Are you alright?" 

Spluttering for the second time I look up and see Alistair. "What are you doing here? I thought you were back at camp." 

"I decided to come and look for you, you've been gone a couple of hours leliana was getting worried." 

"Just leliana?"I asked looking at him. 

"Well, Sten doesn't seem bothered either way and Morrigan is too much of a bitch to care." 

"I meant you, seen as you're here but never mind."

"Oh yes that." He was avoiding looking at me. "I don't have anything to dry you off with."

"What? Oh right," I'd forgotten for a moment that I wasn't dressed, Now I got why he was looking away from me. "No need to be shy Alistair surely you've seen semi naked women before?"

"Er no, we didn't get to mix the woman templars we had seperate barracks we slept in. There weren't that many woman as it was." 

"What about the mages?"

"You only watch over the mages after you take your vows. I went to one harrowing and they had to run her through because she became possessed, put me right off."

"I wasn't planning on a swim but ser woof a lot needed a bath and that meant me getting one too."

"I'll make a fire." Alistair busiest himself making a fire so I could dry off and I used it as an opportunity to finish washing ser woof a lot as well as covertly watching Alistair. Every time he looked in my direction he blushed and rubbed the back of his neck and across his forehead. I was really tempted to pull him in and get him out of that armour so i wouldn't be the only one sat about in my underwear and so I could get a look at him out of his armour. He was very strong, a skilled fighter. I could see why Duncan recruited him, He's exactly the type my father would have had in his ranks. I realise I'm staring as he looks up again and begins to blush. I climb out of the stream and woof a lot and I shake the excess water off before sitting down to warm up and dry off by the fire. I feel a little guilty for getting immense pleasure in making Alistair squirm because he doesn't know where to look every time I ask him a question. I suggest that he strips off and bathes too whilst no one else is about. 

"What if wild animals or something creep up and try attacking us and we're both practically naked?"

"I think ser woof a lot would warn us,"I tell him. He seems very uncomfortable at my suggestion, Which makes me wonder if he thinks I'm suggesting we have sex out here under the stars and I'm wondering myself why I suggested it in the first place.  
"Alistair? I ask, have you never?"

"Never what? Had a good pair of shoes? Seen a basilisk? Eaten jellied ham? Licked a lamppost in winter?"

Wow he really likes to avoid awkward questions. "Sex Alistair have you never had sex?"

"Well I've never had anyone just come out and say it like that."

"Well?"

"No I haven't. Have you?"

"That explains a lot." 

"What's that meant to mean?"

"Explains why your embarrassed around certain topics and woman who are mostly naked in front of you." 

"I never had the opportunity."He huffed. "I wasn't brought up to take advantage of a lady, Is that such a bad thing?"

"No of course not. It's quite sweet and endearing actually." 

"Oh,"he blushed again. Then he remembered he'd asked me the same question. 

"I was with Roland,"I tell him. "We were only fifteen, when we realised we felt something for each other, then my parents found out and separated us. Soon as he turned eighteen though we started seeing each other in secret and yes we had sex. But it was more than that. He didn't take advantage if that's what your thinking," I tell him hastily in case he got the wrong impression. "Roland was every bit a gentleman, he wanted to wait till he'd asked for my fathers hand but I didn't want to. I wasn't planning on being with anyone else. So we were together whenever we could be, Now he's gone."

"How did Howe think he'd get away with it?"

"Howe thought he'd have everyone slaughtered who could tell a different story from the one he had chosen to tell. If it hadn't been for Roland, my mother and Duncan"

"I'm so sorry." He said placing his hand on mine. "You have been through more of an ordeal in the last few weeks than I ever have. You've lost your whole family, I lost Duncan."

"You haven't had an easy childhood though." I tell him, "and Duncan was like a father to you, I do miss my parents and I miss Roland."

"Is that why you wear that locket?"

"Yes it's from Roland." I stand up and pick up my armour. I get dressed and attach my daggers and look for my sword only to find Alistair examining it. "It was from his parents." I say as he runs his fingers over the crest. "It's my family crest and his name engraved underneath." 

"It's beautifully crafted." 

"It is. It's a good sword and it's kept me safe up till now. Along with the daggers my father had made for me." 

"You loved them very much." He said quietly. "I've never had that. Yes Eamon took me in and Duncan took me under his wing but I've never felt that love that you describe."

I gulp down the ball that's formed in my throat. He sounds so sad and lost that I want to wrap my arms around him and tell him it will be alright. Instead I take his hand and say. "You'll Find someone who'll make you feel like you can take on the arch demon single handed. I was lucky to have had any time with Roland and to have the parents I had. They were good kind and fair people, They would have liked you."

"Really? You think so? Most people think I'm an idiot or a fool." 

"I don't think that." 

"You don't?"

"No Alistair, you hide behind humour and evade questions you don't want to answer but I don't think your a fool. Come on let's get back to camp and take them the fish. I'm tired and I've still got to set up my tent." 

"Oh, I already did that." 

"Really? thank you. You didn't have too."

"I upset you you before, I wanted to make it up to you." 

"Oh Alistair. I'm sorry. I was mad." 

He interrupted me.. "No I'm sorry, I tend to put my foot in my mouth when I'm not sure what to do or say. I never meant to make you think that because your young or your a woman you can't lead. You have got us this far and have made more decisions than I've made in my life." 

I impulsively kiss him on the cheek. "I will let you know if you have put your foot in your mouth in future shall I?" 

"You'll be kept busy, I'm always doing it." 

When we got back to camp, we cooked the fish and leliana beckoned me over. "Are you and Alistair together?"

"What? No, I've only known him a few weeks." 

"Oh, it's just you seem very close and I assumed." 

"No, I'm just getting to know him, getting to know everyone really. Why? Are you interested in him?" Wondering why I was feeling a little jealous. 

"No no, he's handsome enough, he just seems a little.."

"Innocent? Naive?"

"Yes I suppose, he seems to have had a sheltered life." 

"Well he did grow up in the chantry. It does show somewhat though, Don't you think it's kinda of cute though?" 

"If you like that type of thing," she gave me a knowing smile. 

"So what's your type?" 

"Er, what do you mean?"

"You started this leliana. The strong warrior type? Like Morrigan likely to put you under a spell? Or more like yourself?"

"Like me? A woman?" 

I laughed. "Nothing wrong with that. I meant rogue. The way you wield those daggers and I've yet to see you with a bow." 

"Oh. I was a bard before I came to the chantry."

"Aren't they some sort of spy."

"There is more involved than that but that's part of it." 

"So how did you end up in the chantry?"

"I was betrayed. Her reverence helped me and after I put it right I went back there."

"So, how did you become a bard?"

"Marjolene she made it seem exciting and taught me everything about being a bard, it was a game we had fun."

"And she was the one who betrayed you." 

"Yes."

"I'm sorry. Some people deserve no mercy."

"I didn't kill her, I could have but I realised I would have done what she would have and would have become her." 

"I don't think I will be that merciful with Howe." I tell her. "Justice will be served when I end him." 

She said nothing for several minutes "you may feel differently when it actually comes to facing him,"she said and then got up. "I think I'll turn in we have a long journey ahead of us No?"

"Yes we do. Goodnight leliana." I whistle ser woof a lot and give him the rest of the fish that's been left and bid all goodnight. 

A few days later we reach denerim and although we are all tired I want to find brother genetivis house I send Sten with leliana to secure us rooms at the local tavern and take Alistair, Morrigan and woof a lot with me. We are directed to a house opposite the tavern. We knock but get no response, trying the door and finding it open we walk in. 

"Hello I call." We walk further in when I figure appears from the kitchen. 

"Yes?"

"Brother Genetivi?"

"No, I'm weylon his apprentice." 

"What kind of apprentice?" I ask 

"I help him with his research."

"Where is he? I have questions about the ashes."

"I haven't seen him for several days." 

"Have you seen any knights?"

"No, last I saw of brother Genetivi he was headed for lake Calenhad."

I looked at Morrigan who raised her eyebrows. I knew he was lying and so did she. According to the letter on ser Henric the knights had found where he'd gone and gone after him. And this man was telling me he didn't know? Woof a lot then started sniffing around the bedroom door. 

"Hey get away from there." He called. 

"What's the problem?"

"Your hound, you need to."

"Check that room Alistair," I say nodding toward the door woof a lot was scraping at. I drew my sword and placed the blade on the weylons shoulder. "Sit,"I say indicating to the chair. He instead decides to try to run at me. The blade slices across his neck cutting an artery and he drops to the floor holding his throat whilst the blood gushes through his fingers. "Idiot," I curse. "Why couldn't you have stayed still." I run him through and end him quickly rather than have him choke to death on his own blood. 

Alistair came out of the room. "Seems the real weylon is already dead this fellow.. oh."

"Fool decided to go for me when my blade was at his neck. I couldn't do anything he cut his artery."

Morrigan picked up the book on the table. "Dragon cults,"she read out loud. "According to this book we need to head to haven." 

"Where that?"

"It's a village in the frost back mountains." 

"Then we need horses." 

"Food first and sleep." Alistair yawned "and I could do with a bath."

We head back to the accommodation and find that sten and leliana had not only secured rooms but had ordered food. We all sat round the table enjoying a bottle of wine and Jugs of Ale for Alistair and Sten with the hot meal. Listening to the others chat whilst I gave ser woof a lot tidbits under the table, It felt like being home again for a short time. The others turned in for the night and I took my time enjoying a soak in the tub they had prepared for me by the fire. A short while later I felt someone shaking me. 

"Wake up."

"Wh what?" Morrigan was shaking me, I must have fallen asleep. 

"Far be it for me to interrupt but I don't think you'd want to go down in history for being the first grey warden to drown in a bath." 

"That would be rather embarrassing." I step out and Morrigan hands me a robe. " Are all grey wardens such a hazard to themselves?" 

"I fell asleep." 

"And would have drowned. Didn't Alistair he had to pull you out of the water the other day?" 

"Woof a lot unbalanced me jumping about I wasn't drowning." 

"And mother rescued you from the tower." 

"We were overrun."

"Still you need to pay more attention." 

"Yes Mother." 

Morrigan folded her arms, "I couldn't care less if you drown yourself. I wanted to get a bath." 

"Of course you did," I grin at her. Noting that Morrigan took a abrupt couldn't care attitude whenever she's caught showing concern. After another night of thrashing about, waking with tears streaming down my face. This time Howe had Roland on his knees dagger to his throat. I was held back by two of his men unable to reach him. I watched as the blood gushed from him and the light died in his eyes. 

Morrigan handed me a drink and leliana put her arm around me. "You were screaming again."

"Are these dreams of darkspawn really so horrific?" 

"Wasn't dreaming of darkspawn. I can cope with darkspawn," I told her, "what's in this?" I asked peering into the cup of hot liquid. 

"A calming tea. It will help clear your head." 

I take a sip. It is made from herbs I can't identify and has the sweetness of honey. Morrigan went back to packing. 

"Do all wardens have nightmares?" Leliana asks. "I've noticed Alistair doesn't seem to sleep much either." 

"One of the drawbacks of the joining is you sense the darkspawn and so end up dreaming about them." 

"How awful." 

"I'd rather dream of fighting darkspawn than dream of watching my family murdered in front of my eyes."

"Is that what happened?" Leliana was horrified. 

"No, not exactly like that. Howe betrayed my father and murdered sister in law, nephew, everyone in the castle. My father was mortally wounded and my mother stayed behind to give me time to leave and protect my father. The man I loved gave his life so I could escape, I left them to Howes mercy or lack of it." 

"But you would dead if they hadn't." 

"That's little consolation though Leliana."

"I see now why you said you don't think you would be that merciful with him. I don't think I would either." 

"I guess we'll see when it happens won't we." 

We head out and look for a horse master. The city watch calls us over, "Warden"

"Is there a problem? Or going to be a problem?" I ask 

"Not from me or my men, we have enough trouble in the city to start trying to arrest the ones helping with this whole mess." 

"Well that's something. Talking of help do you need any?"

"Well I won't turn it away. My men and I are stretched as it is. I can pay you." 

"Actually we are in need of horses. Would we be able to have a loan of any." 

"The regent has garrisoned most of the men here at the moment. I won't be using mine anytime soon. If you can help us out with a few tasks then I will talk to the stable master about letting you use a couple." 

"That would indeed be agreeable. What are your orders Guard captain?" 

We spend two days more in the city dispatching bandits or disbanding rowdy sailors and mercenaries from the taverns, carrying out the quests on the chanters board for more coin. Alistair and I return to the the Guard captain whilst the others relax in the tavern. He takes us to the stables and the stable hand hands the reins of a couple of horses. "I know you'll take good care of them." 

"Thank you we will once we are back this direction we will return them." 

"Maker watch over you." 

We give us each other the standard chest salute. We head out of Denerim and head south towards Drakons river and across the bannorn where the civil war was raging. 

"Ahead of us," called Morrigan above the noise of steel on steel. 

Bodan moves the cart into a position of cover whilst Morrigan and leliana use it as a vantage point to attack loghains troops from a flanked position, Alistair and I ride into the fray whilst sten and woof a lot finishes off any we've trampled under foot. Morrigan transforms into a giant spider engulfing one of loghains men in webbing just as he was about to bring his sword down on Alistair who had his back to him and fighting off another who had caused him to be thrown off his horse. After throwing him off with his shield and ramming his sword into him. He swung round and gave a strangled cry of surprise. 

"Aargh!" 

Sten beheads the soldier and I ride up Alistair horse in tow attempting to hide my laughter. Morrigan had returned to normal at this point and was giving Alistair a look of distain. "She saved your life Alistair," leliana chided, "you could at least say thank you."

"I'm sure she was aiming that webbing at me." He said somewhat childishly

"Alistair!" I said in a reprimanding tone that was reminiscent of nan. 

He looks at me and bows his head. "Thank you Morrigan for your assistance." He said. 

"I don't need your thanks,"she said irritably. "I didn't save you for you."

"Why did you then?" He asks her. 

Morrigan looks over at me and then back at him. "Your still a warden,"was her only response before walking back to the cart. 

I hand the reigns to Alistair which he takes and mounts the horse automatically with a thoughtful expression on his face. I look across at Morrigan quizzically, there's something she's not telling us. We head away from the battlefield after stopping briefly to talk to Bann Telmans men.

"Thank you for your assistance." 

"Your welcome, Loghain can't win." 

"You're wardens aren't you?"

"Yes. And before you ask we were not responsible for The Kings Death." 

"After the regent has been trying to take over most of the bannorn we aren't inclined to believe those stories. You'll have no quarrel from us." 

We say our goodbyes and head through Bann Telmans land and continue heading towards Haven.


	7. Haven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group go searching for brother genetivi and the sacred ashes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always characters and background belong to bioware, there is some in game dialog that is pertinent to the story.

Haven a small very hilly village in the frost back mountains had an eery feel to it. We approached the main part of the village to be stopped by a guard. "What do you want?"He asked. "Lowlanders aren't welcome here."

"We were hoping to find supplies." I tell him. "We've come a long way."

"Hmm. He eyes up the group and says,"very well the village stores are up the hill to the left. No trying anything."

"What does he think we're going to do ransack the village?" 

"Possibly, we are heavily armed."

"But look at this face, does it look like someone who do such a thing?" 

I laughed, "too look at your face you wouldn't think you were capable of cutting down darkspawn either." 

"I'm not sure whether that's a compliment or an insult." 

"I meant you look too cute and adorable too be wielding a sword and shield." 

"Oh," he says blushing. 

We walk through the village and notice a deathly hush, not even a wind blowing through the grass. It is eerie and I feel a chill run through me that has nothing to do with the cold of the frost back mountains. "Where is everyone?"asked Leliana. 

"Good question the place seems deserted."

"Does anyone actually live here?" Asked Alistair. 

We reach the stores, the keeper wasn't particularly friendly. He was keeping a particular eye on Sten. "Never seen a quanari before." 

"Very few have," I remind Alistair. 

While he served us he seemed rather agitated. Morrigan bored began wandering around the store. "Warden you better see this,"she says once I'd paid for the supplies. 

"Hey,what are you doing round there?"

He didn't get a chance to say anything else as Morrigan had put a paralysis hex on him. I came round behind a curtain and saw the dead knights. "Eamons knights,"Alistair says. 

"They must have killed them when they started asking questions about Brother Genitivi."

"So we know hes around somewhere," Leliana says, "I hope he's still alive."

"What do we do with him?"

"Tie him up and gag him so he can't warn anyone. We will have to be cautious."

"Tie him up?" Alistair says "they killed those knights." 

"Alistair we don't know he did and we cant really be making a scene and warning the others." 

"your right, I apologise for my outburst, this just makes me angry. They didn't need to kill them."

"I know,"I put my hand on his arm to both comfort and placate him, "but we don't know what happened, we are assuming they were just outright attacked. " 

"Where to next?"

"We look around the village. Discreetly."

We leave and knock on the door of the house next to the store. No one replies and we open the door. "Hello anyone home?" I call. But we are greeted by silence and a strong smell of dead flesh. 

Eurgh what is that?" Alistair asked walking right into the room. 

There was blood pooled on the floor and across the table. Morrigan walked up to what looked to be an alter. "Cultists,"she said in disgust. "Ritual sacrifice by the looks of it."

"Of what?" Alistair asked, "there doesn't seem to be any animals about." 

"This isn't animal blood." 

"What?"  
"Eww"

"Their own people or the knights?"

"Don't know, but I don't want to be around when they come back do you? Blood magic is definitely involved."

We leave the house as quickly as possible and head up another hill as we walk around we spot a small boy playing in front of one of the houses. He appeared to be chanting. 

"Well that's not creepy at all." Alistair says in a low tone. 

The child looks up aware that he's being watched. "You don't belong here." He says, "you must leave."

"We're just passing through I tell him."

"Lowlanders aren't wanted. You don't belong."

"Where is everyone?"Morrigan asks him ignoring his creepy voice and the chanting.

"They are in the chantry," he says nodding his head towards the building that overlooked the entire village. 

"Why aren't you with them?"

"It's not a meeting for children, my parents told me to stay here."

"The whole village is up there?"

He nods his head.

"Then that's where we need to be."

"Lowlanders are not allowed,"he says. 

"Well I need to speak to the revenant mother."

"Reverent Mother? He asks puzzled father Eirik. 

"Your chantry has a father oversee it?"

"How very tevinter,"says Morrigan, "I suppose he's a Mage as well."

"Like you? yes," he says. 

"Well, we still need to speak to him."

The child shrugs his shoulders and runs off chanting as he does so. 

"That child was very strange," Leliana says. 

"This whole village is strange. Let's go see this father and see if he knows where brother genetivi is."

We head towards the chantry at the top of the hill walking in we see that Morrigan is indeed right and Father Eirik is standing on a platform in front of the gathered village. He stops his speech noticing us. "We have guests, he says extending an arm and indicating that the congregation make room. We bid you welcome. and what brings you here?"

"We are looking for a lost brother of the chantry. We were led to believe he may have passed through here."

He shook his head after a pause. "We have not seen anyone pass through this way in some time." 

"Really,"Alistair says before I could speak. "So who killed the knights back at the store?"

"Ah, very well, there were the knights but my people tell me it was self defence."

"Knights would not attack people without cause." Alistair said scornfully. 

"We don't want trouble,"I tell him "but it's important that we find out what happened to Brother Genetivi and the Knights."

Father Eirik pointed in our direction. "They do not understand our ways my brothers and sisters. They would defile the temple we must defend Andraste"  
Leliana looked across at me whilst preparing her bow, "defend Andrate?"  
"They're loopy,"Alistair muttered making crazy motions with his hands, something that made Father Eirik angry as he shot a ice bolt at Alistair who managed to deflect it with his shield. After that it was a blur or swords, arrows and magic as we fought off the entire village. "Well that could have gone better." Alistair says. 

We all look at him

"What"

"You had to mention the knights before we'd got any information out of them." 

Alistair sounded defiant as he says: "I wasn't going to let them get away with it."

"Brother Genetivi has to be round here somewhere." Leliana says sensing an argument. 

After exploring every room we found a switch and after pulling it we heard something slide back. Coming back into the main hall we saw an opening. "Well it's not often we come across those." Alistair says poking his head round. 

"Hello? I call brother genetivi are you in here?"

"Hello," a voice calls from further in. We walk round a bookcase and find brother genetivi laying on a rug. "What did they do to you?" I ask

"My leg got caught in an animal trap whilst I was exploring. They brought me back here and asked questions."

I knelt down and examined his leg. "I have some poultices and bandages in my pack, will you be alright if I bind it up. Will you be able to move?"

"Yes. Father Elrick had an Amulet on him. It's a key, we'll need it to get to the temple of sacred ashes." 

Morrigan can you look please and get it."

"What am I your servant?"

"Fine, you bind brother genetivi's leg." 

"I'm not touching anyone that wears chantry robes. I'll look for your amulet."With that She disappeared into the other room. 

"How long have you been here?"I asked him. Attempting to cover over Morrigans abruptness. 

"I couldn't say, there's no way of telling two services have passed since I've been lying here. I don't know if they have weekly or more often."

"Do you think you'll be able to walk?"

Alistair and sten helped him up as he tested his weight on his leg. "I'll be fine. Do you have the amulet?"

Here Morrigan hands it to him after remarking that it was elven by design. 

"Yes,"he said, "the temple ruins seem to be elven." She looked at him with a thoughtful expression but said nothing. 

We made our way up a slope behind the village chantry and came to to a locked door. "Now how did he do it?" Brother genetivi muttered to himself fiddling with the amulet till he released a catch and turned it into a shape that he pressed against the door which released a mechanism and opened the door. 

"Ah ha,"he says as he pushes it open. We get so far in when we hear shouting, I push brother genetivi out the way as an arrow comes flying by just missing us. 

"Thank you my dear," he says. 

"Stay down,"I command as leliana begins to fire arrows back in the direction of the archer and Morrigan turns herself into a bird and flies Straight at the group before turning into a giant spider and sending out sticky webbing and chomping down on another one. Alistair, sten and I form a wall against the oncoming barrage of cultists. Sten knocking back three with a swing of his axe. I throw a dagger into the eye of one running at us and as he falls I slice my sword across another. When they are all taken down I retrieve my dagger wiping it on the cloth of the dead cultists armour as I do so. Checking on brother genetivi who assures us he's fine and will wait here as their is so much history to write about and he needs to record it. Satisfied he's safe at least for now we move on. 

At the top of the stairs we are required to perform some sort of ceremony involving lighting the torches in order. After several attempts we manage it. A flame appears in the pit and the door unlocks. I look at Morrigan who was examing the torches.  
"There are a lot of traps on this place,"she said. "Be wary, had we failed this was meant to have trigger a trap but it didn't work. We may not be quite as fortuitous next time."

"Great all we need, cultists and elven traps." 

"Makes a change from dark spawn," leliana says.

" Cultists and elven traps sounds like it should be a song."Says Alistair before bursting into impromptu singing. 

Leliana and I burst out laughing whilst sten and Morrigan give Alistair a disgusted look which makes me laugh more. 

"Fool,"says Morrigan. 

"Maybe," I say "but he's our fool."

"Your fool, he's not mine."

"I'm hurt," he says holding his hand to his heart. "Don't you want me?" 

"I'd rather bed a blight wolf"

"The thrill would be one sided." 

"Enough you two. Maker you bicker like an old married couple."

"What!"They both said at the same time before moving several feet away from each other. 

"Must they behave this way?"complained Sten. "if they were in Saheron they would not behave like children."

"Your making it sound so inviting Sten," Alistair said sarcastically. Unfortunately for him Sten didn't really understand sarcasm. I was somewhat pleased that Leliana offered a distraction when she shouted out trap. Everyone stood still as she circled the floor using her bow to trigger each trap in the room. When she was sure it was safe we moved forward to the next room. 

We came to open area with rooms going off it. After clearing all the rooms from undead elvan soldiers and spiders we came across what looked like a library and an altar. Next to the Altar was a phylactery. I picked it up and immediately heard a voice in my head. I looked at the phylactery and saw it bubbling. 

"Fascinating," said Morrigan. 

"Who are you?" I asked

The voice explained that it was a spirit warrior who fought with Andraste centuries ago. When she was killed she her spirit was trapped. 

"What can I do?"I ask her. 

"The altar," she says, "place my phylactery on the alter and release my spirit." 

I do as she wishes and as the phylactery breaks I get images and knowledge flash through my mind. Pass it on to one who would wield magic she says. "It will serve you well."

"Thank you I say"

Morrigan watched me carefully before saying: "she could have provided you with valuable information on the past. Now we will never know."

"So you'd want your soul or whatever trapped for centuries and then made to provide insight instead of being freed?"

"You have a point."

"She gave me enough information and a way to help." 

"Oh?"

"Yes Morrigan, now let's move on there is still a lot of this ruins we haven't touched yet." 

The ruins led to caves that were winding and full of drakes and dragon cultists. By the time we reached the last cavern we were exhausted. There were a group of men waiting for us. "Stop!"the leader says. "You have defiled our temple and slain our faithful, Tell me why you have done such a thing."

"We came to get some of the sacred ashes to heal someone, Your people attacked us." 

"That's it, that's why you have come, for some old dusty relic? Andraste has overcome death and has returned to her faithful in a form more radiant than you can imagine." 

"What do you mean overcome death?" Leliana asked. 

He ignored the question instead saying, "our lady has returned and not even the Tevinter imperium can hope to slay her now." 

"I'm not interested in whether or not you believe that Andraste is reborn we need those ashes."

"I have a proposal for you he says after a few moments silence, we cannot get past the gaurdian. But you can, If you are willing to destroy the ashes after you have taken what you need." 

"What?" Leliana asks. "Defile Andrastes ashes? Destroy them? Are you insane? Don't tell me you would even contemplate such a thing."

"I may not be the most devote Andrastian Leliana but I'm not a heretic." 

Good she said as she pulled out a dagger and slit the throat of the leader before anyone realised what was happening. She then dispatched two of the men behind him with her arrows whilst sten deftly removed the head of another and I drove my sword into the side of the last. 

Alistair looked a little bemused whilst Morrigan raised an eyebrow before walking ahead to exit of the caverns. "You didn't even give me a chance," he pouted. 

"Blame leliana. I had to move fast before they reacted."

"Hmmm. I'd swear Morrigan has put a spell on you the way you womenfolk seem to read each other's thoughts." 

"If only she could," I tell him. "I'd love to be able to know what goes on in that handsome head of yours." He blushed before turning and following Morrigan out the exit. 

"I've never met anyone who blushes as easily as Alistair does around you." 

"It's not just me. You and Morrigan make him blush." 

"Yes, but we are usually talking about how he behaves around you."

"Oh."

We head out the exit and out onto what was once a balcony and down the sloping path. Further up nestled into the mountain was a door. That must be where the guardian was. Just as we began heading toward the door a high dragon flew over head and landed on the cliffs above. "Andraste reborn I take it," Morrigan nodded her head at the dragon. 

"Dragon cultists," Alistair said shaking his head. "They are all a bit coo coo."

"Let's just avoid its eye line and hopefully it won't notice us, I don't really want to fight a high dragon."

"Shame," Sten said watching it. " I would relish the challenge." 

"You can fight it on your own then." Morrigan tells him. "Let's just get past this guardian, get these ashes and go." 

"What's eating you?" Alistair asked. 

"Not you that's for sure"

Leliana sniggered. 

"Wouldn't touch you if I was starving," he retorted "probably taste of leather."

At that leliana was bent double and I was laughing so much my side began to ache. "Stop, stop," I tell them. "Alistair Morrigan didn't mean literally."

"What did she mean then... oh,"he blushed as he realised. "I would never do such a thing, I'm a gentleman."

"Your a child," Morrigan retorted. "I'm surprised you even knew what I meant." 

"I'm not stupid Morrigan" 

"Hmm, I'm reserving judgement"

"Oh enough you two." I tell them.

We reach the door and step inside at the top of the room there stands someone dressed in armour. "I bid you welcome pilgrim. I am the the guardian, the protector of the urn of sacred ashes. I have waited years for this."

"How many years?"

"Years beyond counting, it is my duty to keep the way open for the faithful who come to revere Andraste and shall do so till my time has come and the imperium has crumbled into the sea." 

"The imperium?" Alistair asks. "They lost the war."

"Did they? Ah then maybe this is the end. When my brethren carried Andraste from Tevinter we vowed to forever revere her memory. For centuries we watched over Andraste and I have seen men proudly take up the mantle of their fathers but as the years past man has lost its way."

"Many wars and blights on the land have happened since then. I tell him just as there is one happening now." 

"If you wish to honour Andraste then you must prove yourself worthy." 

"And how do I do that?" 

"The Gaunlet will decide that, only that will decide your worthiness, if you succeed you will be able to see the ashes and take a pinch for yourself."

"Right. Then I am ready to face this gauntlet." 

"Before you go, I see the path that led you here was not easy, there is suffering in your past and the suffering of others. Tell me pilgrim do you think regret leaving your parents in the hands of Rendon Howe." 

"Of course I regret it, I didn't want to leave them. Duncan had to drag me away, If I could have taken their place I would have." 

"If you hadn't left you would have died." Alistair says, "your parents wanted you to live. Look at all the good you have done. We wouldn't have come this far without you."

"I agree with that," Morrigan says. "I'd never have gone with him, I doubt we'd have got out of the wilds." I rub my temples. I know they are trying to make me feel better but it doesn't make it easier. I still left them there, they still died. 

"And what of your companions? Alistair knight of the grey wardens. You wonder if things would have been different on the battlefield, you wonder if you could have shielded him from the killing blow. You wonder if you should have died and not him."

"Do you?" I ask

"Duncan was the commander of the grey he was a great leader and a good man. Yes I do wonder if I could have saved him."

"No Alistair, you'd have both died, they were overrun and had no help. That was not your fault that was Loghains."

"And you why do you say the maker speaks to you? We all know the maker has left he spoke only to Andraste, do you believe yourself her equal?" 

"No, I never said that." Leliana sounded horrified at his suggestion. 

"In Orlais you were someone, in lothering you feared you would lose yourself and become a drab sister be forgotten. When your brothers and sisters criticised you over what you professed you were hurt but you also revelled in it. You enjoyed the attention. It made you special"

"What! Your saying I did it for the attention." Leliana was indignant," I know what I believe." 

He turned to Morrigan but she stopped him. "Move on spirit I won't play your games." 

"Very well." 

"Ask your question spirit," Sten says to it. 

"You are quinari and came far yet you killed a family in a blind rage. Do you think you have failed them knowing what people may now think of quinari? 

"I know I failed, I have never denied it." 

"What exactly is the point of all these questions?" I ask. "What are you trying to determine."

"If you are willing to face the decisions you make and the consequences of those decisions." He replied. "The way is now open."  
As everyone walked through the door he called me back. "Pilgrim, The one you call Morrigan. She holds information that will be important to your journey ahead." 

"She will reveal it in good time I'm sure." 

"Your faith in your companions does you credit, but she will only stay while it suits her needs." 

"If you know everything you know she came under protest and I have not stopped her leaving if she had wanted to. She has stayed so far. Maybe she hasn't got what she wants yet as long as she continues to aid us that is what is important."

He bowed before looking in the direction of the door where the rest had gone. 

"What was that about?" Morrigan asked

"Nothing I didn't already know or hadn't already guessed." 

"Oh I see. Well let's get on with getting through this gauntlet."

The first test was seeing my father and then my mother and then Roland. I hugged them all in turn and told them I wished I could have saved them. Even though I knew it wasn't them it was oddly reassuring to have them tell me that they were proud of me that they were glad I was safe.  
Even Roland telling me to be happy and find someone who would love me as much as he did. It may have been the guardian but it was like I was being told I could move on. They would always be with me and I would never forget them. 

In the next room we faced ourselves and fight a figure that that knows our weaknesses. It was a hard fight and only working together to take out our spirit version of ourselves. It made me realise how strong Alistair was, how cunning Leliana was and how skillful Morrigan was and how much she was holding back. "I'm glad your on our side,"I said to her. 

"Same can be said for you," she said. "You're quite vicious. Though maybe you should get Alistair to help you work on your defence." 

"What's wrong with my defence?"

"You leave yourself open at times." She said as she dismantles spirit me's attacks and destroys her. 

"And you need to use of those moves more." I tell her, "you've been holding out on us." 

"Some of those moves expend a lot of energy and leave me vulnerable. I will use them only in the most desperate of circumstances." 

"Very well. I don't want to put anyone in unnecessary danger."

She gave me a look as if she wasn't sure if I was humouring her. But before we could say anything Spirit Alistair charged. His shield bash sent Morrigan flying. I jumped out the way of his next charge curled behind him and drove both daggers into his back whilst Morrigan sent a lightening bolt at him in response to being thrown against the far wall. 

Alistair and Sten had been kept busy with spirit Sten whilst Leliana was fighting herself. We stood a moment to watch as it was difficult to tell who was who. 

"Maybe I should just stun both of them." Morrigan said. 

"Good idea."

Next thing spirit Leliana had disappeared and Leliana was sprawled out on the floor. Morrigan passed something under her nose and brought her round. "What happened?" she asked 

"We couldn't tell who was who so i stunned you both. It seems to have worked."

"You did what?"

"Saved you," she replied. "You're welcome"

I had to stifle a laugh at the indignant look on Leliana face. "Why would she do that?"

"I didn't want to join in and accidentally injure you. Morrigan thought stunning you was the safest option."

"I suppose,"she said. Putting her hand out to be helped up off the floor. I pulled her up and looked towards Sten and Alistair who were walking back towards us. 

"Are you ok?"I ask

"Yes thank the maker. I'm glad Sten is on our side." 

"I'm glad you are all on our side. I don't think I'd want to be meeting you in Battle."

We head into a room that is lined with spirits of different people all asking for answer for a riddle. We answered them easily any I didn't know Morrigan or Leliana did. "What a waste of time,"said Sten. "what was the point of that?"

"Make sure we knew our history," said Leliana. "He said only the faithful would succeed in the gauntlet." 

The next task was a bridge, I stood on one of the stones at the side and a part of the bridge appeared. "Everyone pick a stone and let's see what happens." It didn't take long to figure out and with everyone's help the bridge was solid enough to cross. Over the other side was a fire and before it an altar, On the altar was an inscription:  
Those who wish to lay eyes through Andraste must first be cleansed with fire. 

"You are meant to walk through that?" Sten asked

"It is a test of faith," Leliana says "being cleansed means stripping off your old life."

"Of course it does," I say removing my weapons and armour. 

"What are you doing?" Alistair asks

"Removing my armour and walking through the fire."

The fire was warm but It didn't burn me, then the guardian appeared. "You have walked the path of Andraste and have been cleansed with fire just as she was cleansed. You have proven yourself worthy pilgrim approach the sacred ashes."

The fire disappears and I put my armour back on. We all approach the statue holding the ashes. Leliana is in awe. "I can't believe I got to see this." She drops to her knees and gives a prayer to the maker. I look across at Alistair and Morrigan and shrug. 

"Let's just get the ashes and go," Morrigan says. 

I take a pinch of ashes, wrap them in a cloth and place them carefully in a pouch. "Better get back to brother Genetivi." I say heading out the door and back down the mountain pass.


	8. A new home for a crow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the Ashes safely in their care, the group head back to denerim to drop off brother genetivi. On the way their journey is interrupted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All characters and background belong to bioware. Smattering of in game dialog, most paraphrased where necessary.

"Tell me we are heading to redcliffe now"Alistair says as we head out of haven to collect the carriage and horses. 

"We need to get Brother genetivi back to Denerim," I say. "He needs to see the healers, We can take him in the carriage." 

"He can come with us to Redcliffe."

"Alistair we are not carting him round the countryside. We are fighting darkspawn at varying intervals and he cannot fight, It's safer to take him to denerim."

"Very well," he said but I could tell he wasn't pleased. 

It would take fourteen days on horse back and carriage and another seven to get back to Redcliffe. I knew Alistair was worried about Eamon even if he wouldn't admit his reasons. I couldn't risk something happening to Brother Genetivi so we rode to denerim, on the way through sulchers pass we were stopped by a woman. 

"Please help us." She cried, "our caravan was attacked by bandits and I just managed to get away." 

We followed to where she said they'd been attacked by bandits and where she led us right into a trap. "Ah here are the grey Wardens," an Antivian voice said. "Such a shame to end such a beautiful face but orders are orders. Attack." 

Several Arrows bounced off Alistairs shield, Leliana returned fire taking out their archer. Whilst Morrigan sent another flying from their position on the hilltop.  
Ser woof a lot jumped on top of another and ripped into their leather bracers sinking his teeth into the bandits arm causing him to try to fight woof a lot off with his good hand. I fought one on one with the one who set up this ambush. He was an elf, with dalish marking on his skin but I had never heard of the dalish going as far as Antiva, let alone being involved in an ambush. He fought well, he was a trained rogue like myself. Our daggers connected as we blocked each other's attack. He tried to trip me but I jumped over it and pushed back. We matched move for move, it became a dance the way we circled each other and then attacked, blocked, attacked, Watching every movement. The others had already taken down the other bandits and were watching us. Morrigan bored sent a stunning spell hitting both of us. I come round with Alistair kneeling beside me and the Antivian elf tied up leant against a cart. 

"What happened?" I asked. 

"Morrigan stunned you." 

"I stunned him," she said pointing to the elf. "You got in the way."

"I got in the way? I had it under control" 

"Really? you were playing with each other, you weren't fighting. It was like watching a badly performed dance." 

"I wanted to know who he was and who sent him." 

"Well you can question him to your hearts content now." 

"You couldn't have stunned him and missed me?" 

"Not the way you were moving, You were too close to each other for me to miss you." 

"Could have warned her," Alistair said 

"And warn him so he got out the way?" 

"It's alright Alistair, She is correct, help me up."

Alistair stands and pulls me up, I walk over to the tied up elf and nudge him awake with my boot. 

"Oo ow." He put his hands to his head and then notices his bindings. "Huh," he said, "well well, I had thought I'd wake up dead or not at all as the case may be but as you have not killed me I assume you want me for something." 

"Why would you think you'd be dead? Were you not sent to kill us?" I ask

He eyed me appraisingly. "I was sent to assassinate the fabled grey wardens, If we failed I assumed we would not live to tell about it."

"Who are you and who sent you to attempt to kill us?" 

"I am Zevran of the Antiva crows," he sounded rather pleased with himself as if being part of the crows was something to be proud of. "And a rather taciturn gentleman by the name of Loghain ordered the assassination though the contract was set by a gentleman named Howe." 

"Howe?"I growled "that bastard will die when I get my hands on him." 

"I take it you aren't fond of the gentleman."

"I'm asking the questions here."

"Of course, not that I mind being interrogated by such a beautiful woman."

I hear Alistair muttering about just ending him now. I turn and give him a look. 

"Antivan crows?" Leliana gasps 

"You're an Antivan crow." I say. "But they are well known Assassins, Hiring them does not come cheap."

"Small consolation I suppose," said Alistair. 

."You're a skilled fighter I grant you, but your tactics were sloppy are you new to the crows?"

"You wound me."

I glare at him, "I could if you prefer."

"No no, I rather like myself in one piece." 

"And now you failed in your attempt to take us out?" Alistair asked. 

"The crows will want my head and I imagine this Loghain fellow won't be too happy either. So before you decide to end my life for which you have the right to do so I have a proposition." 

"What kind of proposition?" Alistair asks

"I'm listening," I tell him. 

"You could take me with you, I could be your protection, your bodyguard if you will." 

"She doesn't need protection," Alistair hissed. "she has me." He looks at me and says "we don't need him, you can't trust what he says he could try to murder you again." 

"I don't think that will happen," I say. 

"How can you say that?"

"Because he deliberately failed in his attempt."

"What?"

"I could tell by the way he fought," I tell Alistair not taking my eyes of Zevran, who was watching me with interest. "No true crow would fail at an assassination so miserably."

"You seem to know a lot about the crows." He said

"Isn't your loyalty to the crows or Loghain?" I ask ignoring his comment. 

"The crows don't deserve my loyalty," he said somewhat bitterly "and I didn't really like that Loghain fellow." 

I smile knowing from his tone that whatever happened with the crows he was wanting an out and I could give him one. He thought we would kill him and that would be his way out, we can show him another way. "Very well I tell him, I accept your offer." 

"You do?" He and Alistair say at the same time. 

"Yes"

"In that case I pledge myself to you, you have my loyalty, I am your man without reservation." 

"Excuse me!" Alistair says. "I don't want him here, If we aren't going to kill him just let him go." 

"No, Alistair you put me in charge so you can just accept my decisions. We need help and he's volunteering."

"Well I'll be watching him, one wrong move elf I'll kill you myself." 

I crouch in front of him and cut his bindings with my dagger. Then pull him up, "I don't think I have anything to worry about do I?" I ask looking into his eyes. 

"Not from me, when my fellow crows find out.. well I won't let anything happen to you." 

"I'm more concerned about the darkspawn" I look around. "Shame there's no horses." 

"we had to make it look good." Zevran said with an apologetic shrug. 

"You'll have to ride with me for now till we get to take Brother genetivi back to denerim. Then you can ride in the cart till we get another horse."

"You're letting him ride with you?" Alistair asked incredulously. 

"Yes Alistair, with your armour, you are already enough weight for the horse to carry, We are in leather. The horse will manage for short distances. We'll just have to take it slower."

"Someone sounds jealous," Leliana says to him. 

"I am not," he says. "I just don't think you should trust him." 

"I will shoot him if he tries anything," Leliana says keeping her bow at the ready. 

"Comforting that so many are willing to kill me if something happens to you." He says as I pull him up onto the horse behind me. 

"I wouldn't worry, your safe, I know you won't try anything. I'll have the horse throw and trample you before you got to pull your dagger." 

He laughs, "still to have everyone here defend you."

"We all protect each other here." I tell him. "We are all we have."

He says nothing further till we make camp, he comes over and helps me set up the tent. "May I ask you something warden," he says. 

"Of course"

"Why did you let me live?" 

"Because it would be a shame to put such a handsome elf to death, Such a waste."

He laughed. "It would indeed and what will the beautiful warden do with me?"

"I could ravish you," I tell him with a smile. 

"Well if that is your intention, by all means continue." 

I laugh. "Honestly Zevran I saw something in your eyes, I knew you didn't want to kill me, it was in the way you fought." 

"I see," he said "you have remarkable knowledge on such matters for one so young." 

"My parents taught me well," I say "and I'm not that much younger than you are." 

"Only in years my grey warden." I let his comment pass not really understanding what he meant. 

We met little resistance on the way to Denerim but any we did meet from bandits or darkspawn we overcame. Zevran proved himself useful, he was adept with both daggers and a bow. True to his word that he wouldn't let anything happen to me he became my shadow. If I thought I'd been over run he'd appear behind them daggers in the back or tripping them up. Alistair complained that Zevran was possessive. 

"He's just trying to prove himself," I tell him. "We all have each other's backs Alistair."

"He certainly has yours."

"Are you jealous of the fact he's protecting me more than you or that he gets in first before you can?"

"I don't need his protection." 

"Like you don't need Morrigans." I sigh, "are we going to have this for every person who joins us against the blight? We can't pick and choose the help we are offered Alistair. We don't have enough to stand against an arch demon yet." 

"I know, I know," he says,"I just wish we didn't have to rely on people like Zevran and Morrigan."

"It's people like Zevran and Morrigan that will help us succeed. All of us here are here for our own reasons. That doesn't mean we should turn them away because we may not agree with those reasons."

"You certainly like to see the good in people."

"I see the good that's there. You are loyal, caring and a good man, A little naive at times. But I see who you are and I like what I see."

"that's a little unnerving, when you say it like that, I feel exposed." 

"Not exposed enough," I mutter. 

"What was that?"

"Just thinking out loud," I smile. 

"Why do I get the feeling your undressing me with your eyes?"

"Alistair I'm a lady, I wouldn't never tell you if I was trying to imagine what you look like out of that armour."

A familiar blush appears on Alistairs cheeks and he laughed nervously. "I'm going to go back, Over there." He said pointing in the direction of the fire. 

"If your cold Alistair I could always warm you up."

"What? Oh, er no, it's ok, I've got to sharpen my sword. Keep it sharp for killing Darkspawn."

"Very well, you know where I am if you change your mind," I say to his retreating back. I look up as I head to my tent and notice Zevran grinning at me. "What?"

"Tsk tsk, the way you tease poor Alistair," he says. 

"He looks so adorable when he blushes," I say, "I find I can't help myself."

"That is the only reason?" 

"What else would there be?"

He gave me a knowing smile. "Alistair is a capable warrior and Handsome."

"Well of course he is." 

"So you and he not?" 

"Not what? Oh, it dawned on me what he was hinting at. No."

"Why not? You like him."

"I like everyone, mostly." 

He laughed, "not in the same way."

"It's complicated"

"Is Alistair not capable?"

"I don't know, he's never been with anyone."

Zevran raised his eyebrow. 

"And," I continued. "I'm not really ready to get into anything after Roland."

"Roland?"

"He died," and that was far as I was willing to indulge him. He took the hint and changed the subject. "Do you know what I miss about Antiva?"

"What?"

"The smell, Ferelden smells like wet dog."

"It doesn't smell like wet dog."

"You smell of it, you wouldn't notice"

"What's so great about the smell of Antiva?"

"The leather, I miss the smell of leather."

"The leather?"

"Yes, before I left there was a shop that made the finest leather boots and I promised myself when I return that I would buy myself a pair." 

"Were they expensive?"

"Oh very. I would have had to have done several assassinations before I could afford them."

"I may have something you may like." I say and head into my tent and look in the chest Ive been storing the extra weapons and armour we keep on bodhans cart.  
I find what I'm looking for and bring out the leather boots I'd got from haven. "Here," I say handing him the boots. 

He takes them and smells them. "These these are antivan leather, I would recognise the smell anywhere, Where did you get them?"

"From haven there was a shop and I saw them and bought them." 

"I can't accept these, they are beautiful and I have no way to repay you." 

"Zevran they are a gift and you need some decent boots, yours are almost worn out."

Zevran stood staring at the boots, running his hands over the stitching and smelling the leather. "Thank you," he says. "I've never been given a gift before, I will cherish these." 

"Your welcome." I left him to try on his boots and whistled for ser woof a lot. We were all hungry and we were camped near a stream I went to see if there was any fish and get fresh water. Alistair followed me, "your giving him gifts now?"

"It's a pair of boots Alistair, he needed new ones. It's important that our armour is in good condition." 

"Why is he sniffing them?"

"They are made from Antivan leather, He said he missed the smell." I shrugged. 

"How do you know they are made from Antivan leather?" 

"My sister in law was Antivan, she had a similar pair made for my mother."

"Oh. I'm sorry I didn't think."

"Alistair it's fine, I miss them, all of them but concentrating on getting Allies for ending the blight helps as does being with you."

"Oh,"he smiled. 

"With all of you," I hurriedly amended. "You've all become like family to me, It's taken my mind off them for a short while." 

He gives me an awkward hug. "You've become like family to me too." He says.  
. .  
We spend an enjoyable hour or so catching rabbits as the stream had no fish and preparing them to take back to camp. As we walk back into camp Zevran and Leliana exchange glances, I notice them and choose to ignore it. We all sit about the campfire eating and listen to some of Brother genetivis stories of his travels. 

"I had your book forbidden love," I tell him. "Wasn't that banned by the chantry?"

"This is something I would like to read I think." Zevran said with a grin

"Oh yes, that got me into a lot of trouble," he said. "I'm surprised there were any copies left. I was sure that they had been burned." 

"My family had an extensive library," I tell him. "We had a lot of books that weren't readily available any longer."

Brother genetivi chuckled. "Good to know that even my erotic fiction survived."

Alistair spluttered on his drink and started coughing. "Are you alright Alistair?" I ask patting him on the back. 

"Yes, yes, just went down the wrong way." 

I smirked and could see Zevran smirking from the corner of my eye. Even Leliana was giggling on the other side of the fire. "I'm glad a amuse you all," he said somewhat offended. 

"I'm sorry, I tell him I wasn't intentionally trying to embarrass you, I just wanted to ask brother genetivi about the book. I know I tease you mercilessly, I'll try not to from now on." 

"No, don't do that." He said hurriedly,"I think I would miss it if you didn't tease me. It serves me right for having such a sheltered life." 

He sounded so despondent that I gave him a hug. "It's not your fault Alistair, it's makes you who you are and I like who you are." 

"You said that before,"he said smiling. 

"I meant it,"" I tell him. I bid all goodnight go to my tent. I look back and see Alistair sat in front of the fire with a far away look on his face and again I see similarities to Cailan. I couldn't make Alistair tell me, he needed to feel that he could. 

The next day we reached Denerim and took Brother genetivi to the chantry and left him in their care. He thanked us for letting him see the ashes and for bringing him back safely, It had given him more material for his next book. 

We stopped long enough to stock up on supplies and for bohdan to trade and then headed out back towards Redcliffe. The route was quiet and we made good time. Alistair's attitude toward Zevran had improved now he was riding in the carriage with Leliana and Sten. He spend most days riding beside me egging me on to race him. Those few days we almost forgot there was a blight, It was nice to see him relaxed. As we passed sulchers pass we came across a small group of bandits who managed to spook my horse causing me to be thrown off. Alistair charged in and sliced one across his chest with his sword whilst Zevran jumped from the carriage driving his daggers into another. 

Alistair got off his horse and helped me stand whilst Morrigan checked me over.  
"Bruised and a sprained ankle but no broken bones,"she said. "Though it would be better if for the rest of this journey you take the cart."

"I'm fine," I tell her. 

"I'd rather you take the cart, Zevran or Leliana can ride." 

Leliana said she preferred the cart so Zevran took to horseback. Once we'd made camp Morrigan came over with a potion. "It will help with the pain," she said shaking a concoction in front of me. 

"You do fuss Morrigan," I say taking it from her. 

"If something happens to you I'll be left to deal with Alistair." She says "and then you may as well let the arch demon win." 

"You don't think Alistair is up to leading you all?" 

"Is that a serious question?" She asked. "You know that I don't think he'd have been able to lead you out the kocari wilds, without you he'd be useless."

"He's not useless Morrigan."

"He'd be useless if you weren't here, He follows you around like a puppy. Even your hound isn't as attached to you as Alistair is." 

"He's not that bad," I tell her. 

"Choose not to see the obvious if you wish but I'm telling you if something were to happen to you Alistair would be pining for you like your hound, I'd say he's imprinted they way he responds to you."

I smother a laugh "I know Alistair is fond of me but to go as far as say he'd pine is a little much."

"Have it your way," she said walking off. 

Leliana came up to my tent. "How's the ankle?" She asked. 

"Tender but hopefully will be better in the morning, We have another 3 days travel yet."

"Is there anything I can help with?"

"No, thank you for asking but Morrigan has already given me a potion to ease the pain and it will no doubt help me sleep." 

"She didn't seem very pleased with you when she walked off." 

"Oh that, That's because I found it funny that she said Alistair would pine for me if I were to die in battle and she didn't want to be left to deal with him." 

"Well we would all be upset, but Alistair would probably feel it the most."

"You really think so?"

"You must have blinkers on when it comes to Alistair, He tries to hide it but it's obvious he cares for you."

"Well he's more attached to me since losing everyone else at Ostagar, we've all been through a lot since this started." 

"That may explain it," she says "but he seems genuinely lost without you, when you go off with ser woof a lot I've watched him, he seems unsettled till you return." 

"I've never gone far and I have ser woof a lot watching my back." 

"And now zevran," Leliana laughed. "I think you will have a permanent shadow as he's determined not to let you out of his sight." 

"I can't do anything about that, He feels like he has to prove himself or make up for trying to kill us." 

"Hmm, Zevran does seem to be trying to impress you." 

"I don't need him to impress me."

"I don't think saying anything to him will make a difference."

In some ways I like that Zevran is my shadow. He's thwarted several flanking attempts and for that I'm very grateful. I didn't say this to leliana. Instead I asked about her, I couldn't move very far with my ankle and had realised I didn't know that much about leliana. I ask about her family and she tells me about her mother and her dying when she was young and how the lady of the house took her on and treated her like a daughter. Her mother was from ferelden and worked for an Orlesian who took them to orlais when they were driven back in the last war. "Lady Celeste never really liked Ferelden, Said it smelled of wet dog."

"Huh, that's what zevran says as well." 

"I don't mind the smell myself," she says. "I've been in Fereldan a while now so am used to it." 

What happened to your mother? 

"She died when I was young, Lady celeste brought me up, treated me like a daughter. I don't remember much about my mother other than these little white flowers with a yellow centre, they had the most beautiful fragrance. She would leave them in my room at night." 

"Is there anything you miss about Orlais?"

"The fashion and the shoes, I love the shoes, the embroidery, the jewels, the bows. Oo I could talk about shoes for hours." 

"Mother used to come back with some extravagant shoes. One pair had heels and were silver with gemstones covering the top." 

"Oo, they sound wonderful."

"My father would bring her back all the latest fashions from orlais whenever he was there." 

"Did he go often?" 

"A few times a year, they were always getting invitations from some noble or the queen. As well as spending time in denerim with the king." 

"How did you learn to fight?" 

"My parents, before my father took over the castle from grandfather he was a soldier in the kings army. He and mother met when Fereldan was at war with Orlais. My mother was a battle maiden." 

"Really?" Leliana sounded fascinated . 

So I told her how my mother and her family hailed from the storm coast and they were raised on a warship. "My mother and father took down many orlesian warships. When they first met they didn't get on well according to my father. They made a song about it, he sang it to mother when he proposed, Or so the story goes."

"That wouldn't be the soldier and the sea wolf would it?" She asked. 

"Yes, that's it." 

"That's one of my favourites." 

"You know it?"

"Yes, do you want me to sing it?"

"Yes please, I've never really heard it all." 

So leliana took out her lute and sang the soldier and the sea wolf .  
I joined in with the bits I knew, soon everyone was sat near the campfire listening. Leliana had a lovely voice I can see why she did well as a bard. Her voice could distract anyone. 

"That was beautiful," I say when she'd finished. 

"Thank you, I used to sing for lady celeste and she would have me sing in front of her guests." 

I wasn't sure if I caught a hint of sadness in her voice. "Well you have a lovely voice, Would you mind taking set woof a lot and Alistair and find us something for supper, Whatever Morrigan has given me has immobilised my leg." 

"Oh yes of course." She stood and whistled set woof a lot who came over wagging his tail. He looked at me and cocked his head. 

"Help leliana get food." I tell him ruffling his ears and make sure they don't get lost. I whisper the last part in his ears, He barks and sets off to where Alistair is adding more wood to the fire. "Hello Boy, what are you after?"

"Dinner," I say. "Would you mind helping leliana catch something for us all, I can't move at the moment." 

"Of course, Anything for you. I mean anything I can do to help you," he amended to leliana's "how sweet."

I smiled "Thank you Alistair I appreciate it."

Once they had left zevran helped me to my tent after watching my failed attempts at getting up. "You should have called my grey warden, you don't need to struggle."

"I thought I could manage."

"Remind me not to take any of Morrigans potions if they render you paralysed."

"Just my leg."

"Still you can't walk, let me carry you." 

"What? Wait!" I say to late as Zevran lifts me with relative ease and carries to my tent. "You didn't need to carry me, I could have hopped."

"Never have I met a woman so stubborn." He says setting me down on my bedroll. 

"I'm not accustomed to being hoisted by a man, you're stronger than you look." 

He gives me a wolfish grin. "It's come in handy on more than one occasion." 

"I'm sure you've used it to your advantage on your victims."

"Not so many as you'd think," he said, "more that it's come in handy getting away from angry husbands." 

"Well no angry husbands to try killing you in this camp."

"Yet," he says. 

"Meaning?" 

"If Alistair has anything to say about it." 

"Don't you start making predictions," I say. 

"I would say it's an inevitability." 

"What where you saying about being an expert at massages?" I ask changing the subject. 

"I don't remember telling you that."

"You said it to leliana, she was complaining about her shoulders hurting her and you said you could help her relieve some of the tension. Or was that just a line to get her into your bedroll?"

"She is pretty it is true, but it's not me she's interested in and my attention is elsewhere."

"Zevran, I like you but I'm not ready to get into anything serious with anyone."

"My dear grey warden who said anything about serious. I have learned to take my pleasure where I can find it."

"I'm not ready for that either and you may regret that one day. You may find a women who you want to get serious with."

I noticed a pained expression cross his face as he nonchalantly said. "I can wait, I'm not going anywhere. Now what about this massage."

"Very well," I say letting him help me out of my armour so he could massage my back and shoulders. We didn't notice that Alistair had returned till he burst in the tent asking what was going on. 

"I look up from where I am laying on the floor."

"Hey Alistair, Zevran is giving me a massage." 

"Did you want one when I'm finished?" Zevran asked him, "you look like you need to release some tension." 

"You're in your erm in your underclothes." 

"How else is the grey warden meant to get a massage?"

"I don't know, with clothes on?"

"No, no Alistair I will show when I'm finished with Elise." 

"Oh, no it's fine, I don't need one."

"You're missing out," I tell him. "You'd enjoy it, It's relaxing."

"I've got to help leliana with dinner."

"Very well." Zevran says working my back once more. "You only need ask if you change your mind."

By the time Alistair and Leliana had cooked whatever they'd caught, Zevran had finished and gone to wash up. Alistair brought over the rabbit they'd prepared. "Thank you Alistair." I say, he turns to go. "Wait, where are you going?"

"I thought you and Zevran would want..."

"Want what? He gave me a massage that's all." 

"You are in your under clothes." 

"You've seen me in them before. I don't have any other clothes, I've just got my armour, I left everything at the castle and brought what I had on me. We've not exactly stopped for me to buy anything that would remotely resemble finery." 

"Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, I didn't mean to imply that."

"That I was a woman who frequents a whore house?"

"I would never..."

"The look you gave me Alistair when you saw Zevran giving me a massage was that of jealousy mixed with disgust." 

He sat down and wouldn't look at me so I grabbed a blanket and wrapped it round myself, positioned myself in front of him and forced him to look at me. "Alistair..". He looked up into my eyes and I before I could think about what was happening I was kissing him. I pulled away, to thoughts of what was that and what are you thinking going through my head. Alistair didn't move, just sat and stared at me. I watched him unsure what to say. Zevran came past whistling, He looked from Alistair to me and raised his eyebrow. "Are you feeling quite well Alistair?" He asked

"Pardon?"

He repeated his question. 

"Yes I'm fine and got up and walked back to his usual place at the fire." 

Zevran looked at me and I shrugged. "Hmm," he said before heading towards leliana for food. I watched Alistair from my tent wondering if I should say anything. I decided it would be better if I tried getting some sleep and leave it as a conversation for another time. Next morning I awoke and as I got up I tested the weight on my ankle. I could move more freely and walk on it so we packed up camp and made the final journey towards Redcliffe.


	9. Surprises at Redcliffe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arriving at Redcliffe they hope they aren't to late to save the Arl, but everything is not what it seems and Alistair finally reveals his heritage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AS always all characters and backgrounds belong to Bioware, a smattering of in game dialog where its appropriate to the storyline.

We see Redcliffes castle in the distance and head down the slope towards the village. Alistair pulls me to one side and asks to speak to me. "What's wrong? We'll be there soon enough." 

"I have to tell you something," He says, "I should have probably told you sooner." 

"Is it urgent? Can it wait till we've set up camp?" 

"Yes, it's rather important and it can't really." 

"Fine, what's wrong?" 

"You know how I told you that Arl Eamon took me in and raised me?" 

"Yes." 

"Well the reason he did is because.." "He's your uncle and Maric was your father." i finish for him. 

"What! How did you know?" 

"I suspected, my family knew Cailan well, my father served yours. You remind me a little of Cailan, you can see the resemblance and the way you reacted to his death was more than that of your king dying. Your response to finding out Eamon was gravelly ill, Your impatience to get here, Your explanation of you owe him and Calians comment." 

"Calians comment?"

"He told me he didn't want you on the front lines and to watch out for you." 

"He said that? Why?" 

"Maybe because he didn't want something happening to his little brother? He was about to say something else but we got interrupted." 

"He barely had anything to do with me, treated me like an inconvenience."

"Then he cared more than he let on."

"Why didn't you say something before?" 

"And have you deny it? Or make up some story because you didn't trust me enough?"

"I do trust you.."

"Right! You've had plenty of opportunity to tell me, its come up in conversation, you've evaded the question."

"I do trust you, I trust you with my life. It's just when people find out that my father was Maric they treat me differently, I guess I didn't want you to see me as anything other than plain old Alistair." 

"You are neither plain, nor old and I like you regardless of who your father is." 

"You do? Really?" 

"Why do you find everything so hard to believe? what do you think that kiss meant?" 

"Most people humour me, even Duncan did at times. I was always treated differently by everyone when they found out who I was." 

"You think I go round kissing men to humour them?" 

"What!? No no I didn't mean..." he sighed, "So that's why you were mad at me on the way to denerim?" 

"Yes." 

"You suspected all this time and you didn't say anything because you thought I'd lie about it?" 

I crossed my arms across my chest and said nothing. A move not lost on Alistair, he knew, that I knew he'd have lied, evaded the question, done anything rather than answer because he wasn't ready. He looked across Redcliffe for a few moments before looking back at me. "I'm sorry and I'll never lie to you or evade any further questions, anything you want to ask me I'll answer."

"Even the awkward ones? What if I want to probe the depth of your soul?" 

The look he gave me sent a shiver down my spine. "Anything you desire to know," He said in an almost sensual way. "I've never met anyone like you before."

"I'm unique," I smile. 

"Believe me I know just how unique you are." 

"You do realise that you are the heir to the throne." I say changing the subject in an attempt to stop myself blushing. 

"What? No no I'm not, well yes I suppose but no Eamon would make a far better ruler than I. I wouldn't make a good king"

"Don't put yourself down Alistair, why wouldn't you want to be king?"

"I just don't want to be king." 

"You don't always get the choice, something's are decided for us." 

"Maker, I hope they don't try and make me." 

"I think you'd make a good king." 

"That makes it one of you then. Can we just go back to how things were before?" 

"I don't know," I tell him giving him an impish smile. "Maybe I don't want too my prince. " 

"I'm going to live this regret this aren't I" 

"I hope not my prince." 

"Maker, the way you say that is giving me impure thoughts." 

"Mmm. What kind of impure thoughts?" I ask knowing full well this kind of talk turns him beetroot. He rubbed the back of his neck a familiar red flush creeping across him. 

"I know I shouldn't delight in embarrassing him but I adore how he looks when he's embarrassed, that I take every opportunity to do it." He walks back towards the others whilst I walk behind grinning. 

"What have you been saying to Alistair?" Morrigan asks as I come up. "Even the tips of his ears are red. "

"Just more risqué talk," I wink at her. 

"You do spoil my fun somewhat," she says. "I enjoy teasing him too, By the time you've finished with him though he's lost his tongue." 

"I've not started with him yet," I wink at her and we both look at Alistair who has gone a deeper shade of red. 

"Aww, poor Alistair," leliana says "it's not his fault he's not very experienced." 

"I'm sure between us we can give him some experience that he'd enjoy"

"I think he'd prefer to experience what you have to offer," leliana says. 

"You lot are evil," he mutters now a scarlet colour. 

As we walk up to the bridge though we are stopped by a man. "Are you here to help us?" 

"Help you? What's happened?" 

"You weren't sent by the Arl or his men? There are creatures coming out the lake and from the castle. They've been attacking us every night. We've barely slept and have lost so many in the village already." 

"Well we're here now, so of course we'll help." 

"Naturally," Morrigan muttered. "Can't leave well alone." 

"He just said they are coming from the castle. We'll probably have to fight our way in anyway." 

"Oh, fine." 

We head down to the village and into the chantry. There standing at the end is a familiar face. The man standing talking to a villager looked weary and his eyes sunken from too many sleepless nights. "I would greet you properly but these are troublesome times." 

"We heard," I inform him, "we are here to help." 

"You are?" He looked hopeful and the look reminded me of the one Alistair used frequently. Then he looked closer at me, "Wait I know you don't I?" 

"It's Elise Cousland, Ban teagan." I remind him. "Not that you would recognise me it's been a couple of years." 

"Lady Cousland, my apologises. What are you doing here? How is your father?" 

"Dead, my lord. Howe betrayed him, had him murdered." 

"Makers mercy, What about the rest of your family?"

"My mother too, Fergus is still missing, I haven't been able to trace him. I escaped with the grey wardens and am now here with your Nephew." 

"My nephew?" He looked over my shoulder as if he expected to see Cailan. Instead he saw Alistair. "Alistair? Is that really you?" I noted the look of disappointment, I turn and saw Alistair had noted it too. 

"Yes bann Teagan, I wasn't sure you'd remember me." 

"Last time I saw you, you were covered in mud. I'm glad your alive at least." 

"No thanks to Teyrn Loghain" 

"Yes well, I don't believe the wardens are to blame for Calians death. Or that he died chasing glory. What brings you here?" 

"We came to see the Arl," Alistair says. "We met Ser Donnel whilst we were at Lothering. He told us what happened, How is he?" 

"His condition is grave but beyond that I don't know, no one is answering my hails at the castle and no guards patrol the walls. We've heard nothing for the last few days. About when these attacks started happening." 

"There's always something with you isn't there?" Zevren chuckled. 

"Like your assassination attempt?" 

"My dear grey warden, as you so charming pointed out it was a failed attempt and you enjoy keeping me around for your amusement." 

Teagan looked at me then at zevran "Ignore him," I tell him "he does love to exaggerate."

"Didn't seem to be exaggerating in your tent the other night." Alistair muttered under his breath. 

"I told you he was giving me a massage."

"Am I interrupting?" 

"No," I say firmly indicating that the discussion was over. "Tell us exactly what's been happening." 

So he sat us down and told us how four nights ago dead creatures had been coming up from the lake and from the castle and that they've been barely keeping it together, they'd lost half the village. They didn't know how long they were going to hold out. "We can help fight them off," I tell him, "maybe we can even help with the defenses." 

"What are you getting us into now?"

"These people are needing our help Morrigan surely you wouldn't walk away?"

"They are far from helpless Leliana." 

"We need to get into the castle, until we find out whatever is causing this that's not going to happen." I tell her. 

"It's magic," she said somewhat dismissively. 

"If so they are indeed needing our help. There are no mages here." 

"And how can you know that?" Alistair asked 

"We have no mortalitasi in fereldan," she replied, "I do not know of the chantry approving reanimation of the dead unless it was done through demons and magic. We'll probably find as much when we get into the castle." 

"Who else is in the castle?" I ask Teagan. 

"Just Isolde, Connor, a few remaining knights, guards and servants." 

"No one else?" 

"No, not that I know of, What are you saying?" 

"I don't know, something doesn't feel right." 

"Well, we will welcome any help you can offer us. Murdock is co-ordinating everyone if you wish to talk to him." 

"I will do so immediately." I say giving Teagan a bow before heading back out of the chantry, On the way out a young woman bumps into me. "Oh I'm so sorry," she says attempting to dry her eyes. 

"Is something wrong?" 

"It's my brother Bevin, He's run off, I've looked all over but can't find him. If he's out there the next time there's an attack.."

"We'll look for him whilst we're checking the defences if you like." 

"Oh would you?" She asks hope creeping into her voice. 

"We're a baby sitting service now are we?" Morrigan huffed.

"Looking for a lost child while we're doing other things is hardly going out of our way Morrigan." 

"Why can't her parents look for him?" 

"Seen as she said she's looked all over, its safe to assume that her parents are dead. They may have died in the attack. Try and show a little compassion I know you've hidden In there." I point at her heart. 

"She doesn't have any," Alistair piped up. "Her hearts made of stone." 

"Just because I don't wear it on my sleeve like you Alistair." 

"Don't start squabbling now you two." 

"I think they should get a room and get it over with." Zevran says, "the sexual tension between you two is quite palpable." 

"Get what over with?"

"You are joking?" 

"No Zevran, Morrigan and Alistair most definitely are not going to be pursuing any carnal pleasures." 

"What!" 

"I wouldn't touch him if my life depended on it." 

"Why not? You are a beautiful woman and he is quite a handsome muscled man. Or do you prefer women?" Zevran looked at her with interest. 

"I neither prefer women or fool men and Alistair is a fool his appearance has nothing to do with it." 

"So you admit he's handsome."

"If you think he's so attractive why don't you bed him.2 

"Hey, don't I get a say in it?"

"No one is bedding Alistair," I interrupt. "Not right now anyway." 

Leliana and Zevran laugh." Seems you aren't getting a say Alistair." Zevran slaps him on the back. "Your fellow grey warden has plans for you." 

Alistair blushed and looked across at me. I try and fail to look nonchalant instead a blush matching Alistair's flushes my cheeks. 

"My dear grey warden you seem flushed Are you quite well?" Zevran puts his hands on my face grinning. 

I push him off. "You lot are impossible." I needed air and to cool off, I know it seemed hypocritical to tease Alistair and quite enjoy doing so, but I find myself becoming a little defensive when anyone makes any suggestions about Alistairs love life. Outside was a Man in leather armour giving instructions to others in the village those who where old enough and capable enough to fight. "Murdoch?" I ask

He turns and looks at our group. "Can I help you with something?"

"Actually we are here to help you." 

A look of relief came over him. "Thank the maker, I thought we were alone in this." 

"You are not alone any longer my good man," Alistair told him. "We will put an end to this nightmare, Or rather she will." He nodded his head in my direction "after all we just do as we are told." 

"Wish you would," I mutter, to Murdoch I say. "What do you need help with?" 

"Building the barricades, recruiting more capable men to fight and getting Owen to repair weapons and armour." 

"Consider it done, Morrigan you and leliana go and round up anyone who can fight and Sten and Zevran help with the barricades. Alistair and I shall go and talk to this Owen. Where can we find him?" 

"In the building opposite. He's the blacksmith, He's locked himself in and is refusing to come out."

"Not that it was obvious or anything," Alistair murmured

I gave him a look "What?" 

"Let's get on shall we." We give the door a sharp knock. 

"Go away." 

"Are you the blacksmith?" 

"What of it?"

"I've business to discuss with you." 

"What type of business?" 

"Nothing I wish to discuss in front of the whole village." 

"You realise that makes you sound like your soliciting your services." 

"Are you suggesting I'm offering the man sexual favours Alistair?" 

"It's just er." He turns red and I grin. "Actually I was going to offer your services." 

"What?" 

"Handsome, Muscly if a tad shy specimen such as yourself. He'd be an idiot to refuse." 

"You wouldn't."

I pretend to consider it before saying. "Maybe not, I think I'll keep you all to myself." 

"Oh you will? I.." 

At that moment the blacksmith opens the door. "What do you want?" He asks gruffly. 

We are both hit by the overwhelming stench of liquor. "Someone's been drinking." 

"You don't say? now whose stating the obvious?" I turn to Owen and ask "Aren't you going to let us in?" 

He steps back allowing us through the door. "Smells like a brewery in here," Alistair said wrinkling his nose. "Are you sure this is the blacksmith?" 

I ignore him and turn my attention instead to Owen. "So I hear your a blacksmith of some renown." 

"Pfft, where you hear that?" 

"Your Man out there, Murdoch is it? He says your highly skilled and won't recommended any other." 

He looked momentarily surprised. "He really said that?"

"Yes, though you seem to have locked yourself away. Why is that?" 

"What business is it of yours?" 

"such a talented smith wouldn't be locking himself away without a reason." 

"It's My Ellena, she works up at the castle and I don't know what happened." 

"You realise I can't go to the castle till after we've dealt with these undead creatures?" 

"But you are going to the castle?" 

"That is why we are here." 

"Will you look for my Ellena?" 

"I can see what's happened but what if it's bad news?" 

"I'd rather know either way." 

"If I promise to let you know will you repair the weapons and armour?" 

"Yes, I will start up the forge and get to work." 

"Very well." We bow and leave. 

" that went better than expected, are we really going to look for his daughter?" 

"We can ask at the castle. We could even come across her, we don't know what's going on until we get there." 

"Of course." 

We go back and tell Murdoch that Owen has agreed to work on repairs and provide more weapons. I then ask about Bevin. "Last night saw of him he was running towards their home." 

"Where is that?" 

"Up the steps and turn right house at the end." 

"Thank you." 

Alistair gives me a quizzical look. "I said I'd look for him, I'd rather do it without Morrigan muttering." 

"Why do you keep her around? I'm sure we can manage without her." 

"Alistair I know you two don't get on but she's the only Mage we have, her magic has come in handy and has saved us both on more than one occasion." 

He scowled. " I don't trust her." 

"You sound like a petulant child. Flemeth sent her for a reason, She knows more than she lets on and cares more than she lets on. A habit you and her share." 

"What? I don't have anything in common with her." 

"Fine have it your way, she's staying unless she chooses to leave. We need her, we need all of them." 

"Even Zevran?" 

"Even Zevran." 

"How can you trust him?" 

"There is more to Zevran than what you see." 

"Hmmm." 

We arrive at Kaitlyn and Bevin door, I knock but there is no answer. We try the handle and find the door is unlocked. We call throughout the house with no response until we hear a smothered cough coming from a cabinet. "Come out I say to the door, we aren't going to hurt you." 

The door opens and a boy around ten climbs out. "What are you doing here?" 

"I came to get my grandfather's sword. I thought I could use it to protect Kaitlyn.. but it's too heavy." He sounded forlorn. 

"That was brave. I'm sure one day you will be a strong warrior like Alistair." He looked at Alistair and then at me. "Do you think so?" 

"Yes but right now, you need to go back to your sister and let her know you're alright." 

"Ok." He said. "What about grandfathers sword?" 

"Where is it?" He took us to the bedroom and unlocked the chest it was in, I took out the blade. It was beautifully crafted and had a rune imbedded in the hilt. 

Alistair took it from me. "This is Dalish made." 

"Grandfather was a dragon slayer," Bevin said proudly. We took Bevin back to the chantry where Kaitlyn was waiting. "He went looking for this," I say, handing her the sword. 

"I was going to sell it for passage to Denerim." 

"I could buy it from you if you like?" 

"Oh I don't know what it's worth." 

"It's valuable," says Alistair. 

"How about I give you five gold coins for it?" 

"That much." 

"It's worth it." 

"Oh thank you my lady. I didn't know how I was going to manage since mum and dad passed, You've saved us." 

I turn to Alistair and hand him the sword. "Your giving it me?" 

"Yes, if it was a dragon slayers sword it'll be in good hands with you." 

"Oh thank you," he says unsure what to say. "I've never been given anything before apart from my mother's amulet and the grey warden armour and weapons." 

"You're welcome." 

"Actually there was something I wanted to give you, but I didn't know whether it.. well here..." He hands me a single red rose. " I saw it in Lothering and maybe I shouldn't have picked it but I thought that amongst all the death and destruction bloomed something beautiful and well it reminded me of you." 

"Of me?" 

"Yes because you are beautiful and a rare, wonderful.." 

I didn't let him finish., I kissed him. "Thank you Alistair that is one of the most beautiful sentiments I've ever heard, I'm touched." 

He began to blush but looked pleased. "I'm glad you like it." 

"I do." I wrap it carefully up with the letter Roland gave me and tuck into my armour ensuring it couldn't be dislodged. He watches me with interest. "What?" 

"You put it in your letter."

"You gave it to me and I don't want to lose it, I know it will be safe here." 

He smiled and walked towards the barricades whistling. Zevran and Sten came up to report that all barricades were in place. "Alistair is whistling?" 

"He's in a good mood," I tell them

"I'm sure that has something to do with you." 

"Why do you say that?" 

Zevran laughed, "If anyone can put Alistair in a good mood it's you my dear grey warden." Sten nodded, "you do have an effect on him. I have watched him, when your angry he's very snappy and when your in good mood so is he." 

"What? Are you saying my moods affect Alistair?"

"I thought it was the way grey wardens were." 

"I don't know, I don't think so, I'll have to ask. Have you seen Morrigan and Leliana?" At that moment I heard them. "Why should he get away with hiding in his home whilst we fight. Hope they get over run.2 

"What's going on?" I ask

"There is a dwarf with some mercenaries locked away refusing to come out and help." Leliana explained. 

"I should have shocked him." 

"Morrigan isn't happy with his decision." 

"Maybe some coin will get his co-operation." 

"What! your going to pay him?" 

"If he dies we take the coin back." 

"Very well, but I'm not going back there." 

"Fine wait here. " I walk back with Leliana whilst Morrigan stands with Sten and Zevran. "Have you noticed that Alistair's mood changes if mine does?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Zevran and Sten said that if I'm in a good mood then Alistair is and when I'm in a bed mood he is snappy with everyone." 

"Alistair is usually in a bad mood round Morrigan, you are able to cheer him up and make him smile more than anyone else, but if you're in a bad mood we are all affected. No one wants to be on your bad side, especially Alistair." 

"I'm not sure what to say." 

"He cares for you, he doesn't like to see you upset. None of us do." 

"You're a good friend Leliana," I say to her whilst thinking that I need to find out if all wardens are connected to each other through the taint and if it can affect how we respond to each other's moods. We get to the dwarves home and Leliana knocks on the door. "Go away a voice says." 

"Let me in I have a proposal for you." 

The door opens, "what do you want warden?" 

"My companion tells me you aren't willing to help the villagers." 

"What of it?"

"What if I made it worth your while?"

"Unless you are talking coin you can forget it." 

"How much would it take to hire you?" 

"I won't go less than 100 silver." 

"Very well," I say and hand him 50. "Half now, half when I see you all lined up ready for battle." 

"Nugs don't fly round you," he says taking the bag. "We'll be out there don't you worry." We leave and head back to the others. "He says he'll join in." 

Leliana laughed. "I'm sure you'll have Morrigan deal with him if he doesn't." 

"He won't get paid if he's not out here." 

"What do you mean by she'll have me deal with him? I'm not here to do her bidding." 

"Admit it you enjoy me ordering you about." I say winking at her. 

"Oo I hate you." And she turns and walks off. The others look at me. 

"She doesn't mean it." 

"I don't know why you keep the witch around." 

"You have a real problem with mages Sten." 

"We keep ours bound and gagged." he says," Magic should be controlled and not left to wander freely." 

"Really? Don't you teach your mages to control their powers?" 

"Mages are weapons they are fit for no other purpose. She should be put on a leash." 

"Morrigan may take that as some sort of invite for carnal pleasure." 

"What." 

"Who knows what sort of thing she's into." 

"You are not taking me seriously." 

"True but I'm not about to bind, gag or leash Morrigan. Wouldn't do that to my own hound let alone a fellow human." 

"Then you risk your life." 

"Sten we risk our lives everyday from darkspawn and their emissaries. Morrigans magic is dangerous but it is also useful and she has saved us, you included on many occasions. If we are at risk from anything from Morrigan it is from her tongue. She has a sharp wit and she likes to tease." 

"She is evil." 

"That's a bit harsh. She doesn't suffer fools like you, in fact she agrees with you more often than not." 

Sten glared at me. 

"Don't deny it, I've heard you both muttering in the background when I make a decision you don't like." 

"I do not mutter, I clearly state you are wrong." 

"In your opinion"

"And in your opinion you are always right." 

"I'm the leader I have to make decisions whether you agree with them or not. They may not always turn out to be the right ones but I must do what I have too to get the allies we need to end this blight." 

"Then lead and let's stop talking." 

I shake my head as I look across at Leliana and Zevran, they shrug their shoulders. I walk towards Murdoch where Alistair stood talking. "My lady" he says noticing me. 

"What else is there to do?" I ask "Dwyn and his mercenaries are joining the fight as are anyone else we've managed to round up. The barricades are ready and Owen is repairing the weapons and armour." 

"Yes, I don't know what you said to him but he's moving faster than he ever has. There is only the Arls knights to speak to about preparations I believe." 

"Right we'll head there now." 

"Where's Morrigan?" Alistair asked

"Probably gone back to camp in a sulk." 

"Why am I never around when you annoy her?" 

"Because she's usually annoyed at you." 

"She hates me." 

"Why are you pouting? You hate her as much as she hates you." 

"Hates a strong word." 

"When it suits." 

Alistair stuck his tongue out at me. It was times like this it was obvious why Alistair's family humoured him, he really was a little boy at times. "I have something I want to ask you," I tell him. "You are coming with me to talk to the knights." 

"Not that I mind coming with you," he says, "I'll always go wherever you go, but why do I get the feeling I'm in trouble?" 

"Let's go." Everyone else heads to camp in order to rest up and prepare for the evenings battle. Alistair and I head up the slope, I stop half way up and look over the village.  
"Alistair are wardens linked through the taint?" 

"Linked? As in we can feel and sense the darkspawn?" 

"No, as in can wardens affect other wardens moods, emotions, sense what other wardens are feeling?"

"Not that I'm aware of. I've heard wardens who are family or have a close relationship know when they are in trouble but how true that is I don't know. Why do you ask?"

"It's just something Sten said." 

"He said more than two words to you and I missed it?" 

I smiled at him, "yes he can be quite chatty when he wants to be." 

"Must be the effect you have on him." 

"You make it sound like I put a spell on him." 

"Aha I knew it, your a secret apostate aren't you. I knew no one could be so naturally bewitching, charming and fearless without some sort of magic." 

"What," I laugh. 

"Everyone around you is captivated. Morrigan and Sten listen to you and respect you in spite of themselves and Zevran and I also suspect Leliana want to bed you." 

"You sound almost jealous." 

"Maybe a little, I'm no leader," 

"I have a commanding presence," I joke though I don't feel very convinced. 

"It's true you do have a very commanding presence. After all you've been through you command respect, your presence tells everyone you're in charge. You would make a good queen." 

"So when your crowned King you're going to marry me are you?" I ask the words coming from my mouth before I realised what I'd said. 

"I'd gladly have you as my queen," he says, not a blush in sight. "Any man would be Honoured to have such a strong beautiful warrior by his side." 

Not for the first time I find myself at a loss for words. So I kiss him on the cheek. "What was it sten said anyway?" He asks. Changing the subject. 

"That my moods affect yours and he thought it was a grey warden thing." 

"Your moods affect everyone."

"What!" 

"Maker I didn't mean it in a bad way." He said backtracking when he sees the look of horror on my face. "We look to you for guidance, you boost our morale, when your happy we all are when you're upset we.. Well none of us like to see you upset. and It vexes me when I do or say something that has upset you. None of us want you to be angry at us, you have quite a temper, I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of your sword." 

I don't know what to say to that and Begin walking up the slope once more. We reach the knights and ask how the preparation is going. "Apart from Barricades there is not much else we can do." 

"The store has barrels of oil I tell him." 

"Oil? How much?" 

"Enough to set a good few monsters alight." 

"I will send someone at once to fetch them. Thank you my lady." 

"Is there anything else I can do?" 

"You can ask the mother for some holy protection." 

"Er what kind of holy protection? All she'll do is say some prayers." 

"Even if she blesses some symbols of Andraste It will be enough." 

"Ah," I say suddenly understanding that it was more as a morale boost than any actual protection. " I'll ask." 

"Thank you."

We turn and head back towards the village, I spy a flower and ask Alistair what it's called. "Andrastes grace." He says. "They used to have them in pots in the chantry gardens." 

"They look like the flowers Leliana was describing." I pick it, turning to Alistair I say. " I think she'd like it." 

"Where's my present?" 

"Maybe I have something for you at camp." 

"Oo wait, This isn't a trick is it? You aren't just saying you have a present for me and woof a lot has a slobbery bone in my sleeping bag?" 

"That would be present from him not me." 

"Oh good. Please don't let him give me presents." 

"Are you saying you don't appreciate my hounds fur covered slobbery gifts he gives you all out of the goodness of his own heart?"

"Don't try making me feel guilty." 

"Ser woof a lot will do that all by himself." 

We reached the chantry and spoke to the mother. "I can't do that, It would be a lie." 

"He just wants to make them feel better, they know it won't give them protection. Soldiers need a moral boost. I'm sure Andraste would approve." 

"I'm not so certain," she said her tone disapproving. "But if you think it will help then here." She hands me some amulets to give to the knights. I thank her and turn to leave. On the way back we stop pass Murdoch. "Is everyone ready?" 

"The men are on edge but we as ready as we can be." 

"Would it help if I gave them a rallying speech?" 

"You can try," he says before calling the men together. 

"I know you are afraid, afraid for your families, afraid this won't end, but you have fought hard these last few nights and have prevailed. Tonight we will prevail once more, we will drive these creatures back to depth from which they came. We wardens are with you, we will show them our strength, we will show them our courage and we will show them our steel. It ends tonight." There was cheering from the men. "Rest now, so you are refreshed for the battle ahead, Maker be with and watch over us all." 

The men and villagers disbanded. "Well you know how to motivate people, I'll give you that," says Murdoch. 

"Have faith my good man, we will win."

"I hope so," not sounding particularly convinced. 

We head back and hand the amulets to the knights. "Thank you," he says "this will help." 

"Get your men to rest," I tell him. " It will be a long night." 

Alistair and I head to camp. " Ser woof a lot can stand guard, We all need some sleep before dusk." Leliana is cooking up a meal when we get back. Alistair sniffs the pot. "Mmm smells good and I'm rather hungry." 

"You wardens are always hungry." 

"We have to keep our strength up for killing darkspawn," I tell her sitting down. I reach into my pack and hand her the flower I had picked earlier. "whats this?" she asks

"It's called Andraste's Grace." I say, "are they not the flowers you said your mother..." she interrupts me. "Yes, I recognise the smell." she says, "Thank you, it is a lovely gesture."

"you're Welcome Leliana." 

I put ser woof a lot on guard duty whilst the rest of us got some much needed rest. As dusk approached I woke up and looked up at the sky, the orange gold sky had already started to fade. It didn't long to rouse the others, I didn't need to ask if they were ready. It had become automatic. We saw the fire before we'd got to the knights. Leliana, Zevran and Morrigan got into a position on the hill and began firing bolts and arrows at the creatures making their way down from the castle. Everyone else took their position to attack once they came through the barrier. The first group that Leliana and Zevran arrows missed got burned in the fire. The next wave brought more those that broke through the barriers we drove back the knights striking from behind their shields sten, Alistair and I flanked them. Morrigan was right it was some kind of magic that had summoned them and they were easily defeated.

"Warden we need you in the village, they are coming from the lake." Thomas tells us running up. 

"Go we can handle the stragglers," the knights say. We all run after Thomas down the slope into the village where the they are becoming surrounded. "Archers," I shout. "Chantry steps and fire." 

Shields up, Murdochs men created another barrier whilst the archers fired a volley of arrows. Sten spun round his sword and cut down several of the creatures. Between us, Murdoch and his men we fought off wave after wave. The men were getting tired, "Zevran, Leliana, lay some traps around the front of the barricade." I tell them, "Morrigan lay some magic traps and everyone get behind the barrier." 

"What are you going to do?" Murdoch asked. 

"We'll head out and meet them coming from the lake, You take out the stragglers, Get any wounded into the chantry." 

"Are you sure we shouldn't be sticking together?" 

"Your people are farmers, not soldiers. They have done well up to now but I don't intend on losing anyone to corpses. Our group is big enough to do plenty of damage." 

We head towards the lake splitting into two groups to take either side and meet any oncoming undead. Sten Leliana and Zevran go one way whilst Alistair, Morrigan, ser woof a lot and myself head the other way. Blocking the way to village we fight till dawn, the odd creature breaking through as we cut down the creatures. Soon as dawn arrives the creatures have disappeared, we head back towards the chantry. There were a few wounded but no dead from the villagers. "I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it for myself." Murdoch says. "You said we would survive, not one lost either. Maker bless you all for coming to our aid." 

Teagan beckoned us over. "I may have a way into the castle, meet me at the windmill and I'll explain." 

I look at Alistair who shrugs. We check on the wounded and ensure the revenant mother has enough healing potions before taking our leave and heading toward the windmill. Arriving at the windmill the knights are sat on boxes and leaning up against the wall. It had been a long night, they looked drained. "Ban Teagan," I nod in acknowledgment. 

"I don't know how much time we have," he says. "We need to get into the castle." 

"I agree, the sooner the better, you said you have a way in?"

"It's an old escape route used by the family from when my father had this estate before the orlesian occupation. My father and sister used it too escape, We can get into the castle that way." Just as he was about to lead us to the escape route we hear calling. "Teagan, oh Teagan, thank the maker you are alright." 

"Isolde?" Teagan is surprised to see her. "What's happened? where is everyone? I've been hailing the castle for days." 

"Quickly Teagan you must come with me, It's Conner." 

"What's wrong with him?"

"I can't explain now, you must come with me." 

"Now wait a minute," I say interrupting her. "Start from the beginning, we didn't just last a night fighting off the undead for no explanation." 

Who are you? She asks wrinkling her nose as if talking to a servant. 

"This is Lady Cousland," Teagan tells her, " Teryn Couslands daughter." 

"I beg your pardon your ladyship I didn't recognise you". 

"What has happened at the castle?" 

"A Mage has poisoned the Arl and has let loose a demon in the castle. I was given permission to come and get you for Connor." 

"Has a demon possessed this Mage?" 

"No, he's in the dungeon." 

"Then how have they let loose a demon?" 

"I don't know, there are creatures all over the castle." 

"Of course I'll come with you Isolde." 

"Hang on a minute," Alistair interrupted. "Teagan you could be walking into a trap." 

"I beg your pardon? Oh Alistair," she said a look of disdain on her face. "What are you doing here?" 

"He's with me." I say in a tone that betrays my annoyance and dislike of the woman. "I agree with Alistair, there is something else going on here, she's not telling us the whole story. Turning to Isolde I add, I dislike being lied too." 

"It's ok," Teagan interrupts !I'll go with her and see what's happening. Take this, it will let you into the passage under the castle." He hands me his signet ring and follows Isolde and the Soldier who has accompanied her. 

"Good luck," I say, we'll head out immediately . 

"We will?" Alistair asks

"You want to know what's going on don't you?" 

Of course, but 

"We need to get into the castle as quickly as possible." 

"You're right, I was just hoping we had time to get some food first." 

"Very well, we could all do with a rest and something to eat. We'll stop long enough to get something to eat and replenish arrows, potions and anything else we may need." 

We were soon on our way. Sten stayed behind to mind the camp, as soon as he saw how narrow the tunnel was and how much we'd have to crouch to get through it.  
"I'm not going to get through there," He said. Looking at his height and build I agreed it would be better for him to remain at camp and wait till we got back. Though he wasn't happy and grumbled about charging the gate would have been easier. The windmill passage led through the underside of the castle and out into castle gardens and stables. Alistair looked around, "It looks a lot smaller than I remember."

"You were a boy when you left, it's been a long time." 

"I spent most of my time in the stables and in the gardens." 

"Are we going to be subjected to stories of your childhood now?" Asked Morrigan. "The poor bastard son of the king who grew up in a castle." 

"No I was just saying it's changed from what I remember. I wasn't going to say..."

"You were about to go on about how you had such an unhappy childhood, that you hid in the gardens and stables till they dragged you off to the chantry." 

"Morrigan!" I scolded, "that's quite enough. No one here can help their upbringing and some have had worse lives than others. Flemeth taught you hard lessons that you can look back on and appreciate. Alistair although your life wasn't easy you have always been cared for. If anyone has had a hard life it is Zevran." 

"Zevran?" Alistair asked "what about Leliana?" 

"Me?" Leliana asked. "Don't include me in this conversation, I had a happy childhood. I loved my life in orlais with lady Celeste." 

"My dear grey warden, I may have grown up in a whorehouse but my life was better than many others. I joined the crows and have bedded many women and then I met you, most fortuitous wouldn't you say?" 

"For you," Alistair retorts. "You've managed to worm your way into our leaders affections." 

"I've pledged my loyalty and myself to her. What is wrong with keeping my promise?" 

"It's your distance from her tent I'm worried," about he mutters. 

"Andraste preserve me," I say. "Alistair enough, Zevran isn't bedding me, for the last time he gave me a massage! Now can we get back to getting in the castle before someone notices us standing around." 

We skirt the stables and make our way to the cellar door that leads to the kitchen and into the rest of the house. Inside we have to fight off several undead and a shade. Morrigan uses a spell to prevent the shade from using its magic and then uses another to cage it. whilst Leliana puts a couple of arrows into an advancing corpse and Zevran who'd moved into the shadows comes up behind it and drives two daggers into its back. Alistair and I take on an undead each aware that despite the shambling they attack quickly. I block its attack with my sword whilst driving a dagger into its shoulder making it difficult to lift its sword. I then cut off its head and slice through its torso. Alistair knocks back the other with his shield before cutting it in two. When all are taken out Morrigan uses a fire spell to burn the corpses to prevent them from rising again. Once she is satisfied there is nothing left but ash and the flames are out we move on. 

It is late morning by the time we've made it to main hall where we find Isolde, Teagan, several guards and Connor. "Who are these people mother?" Connor asks in a voice that clearly isn't his own. 

"These are the people I told you about Connor. They've come to help your father." She dropped her head and seemed to cower away from him. 

"We don't need their help, I'm helping father." 

"Of course Connor but.." 

"Don't argue foul women. I don't want these people here." 

"Well well," says Morrigan. "The child is a Mage, Was it him that struck a bargain with you demon?" 

He turned to look at her directly. "He came to me in the fade and I told him I could save his father." 

"You mean you tricked his weak untrained mind." 

"I have done as he has asked." 

"Oh yes and where is his father?" 

The demon decided that it had enough of Morrigan, It viewed her questions as insolence. Before we realised it had taken control of the soldiers and Teagans minds making them attack. Alistair put up his shield in front of me and blocked his uncles sword. 

"Don't harm them," I call to the others, "try and knock them prone.", 

"We'll do our best my grey warden." Zevran says dodging a soldiers strike. "They are intent on killing us, making it difficult to do as you ask." 

"I know," I tell him blocking a strike and pushing back a soldier who Leliana knocks out. 

Morrigan stunned Connor which seemed to bring him to his senses and with him Teagan, "My mind it is my own," he says. 

"Connor?" Isolde asks, "are you alright?" 

"What, what happened?" He asked. 

"So the demon hasn't fully possessed him." says Morrigan

"No, he only becomes the demon When he's frightened. Please don't hurt my Connor." 

"You realise you caused this don't you?" I tell her. 

"I only wanted him to be trained properly and not be taken away. Eamon will have him taken to the tower." 

"Just as every child who manifests magic is," I say. "I understand how you feel lady Isolde, but because you weren't honest this predicament is partially your fault." 

"I don't know what to do now," she said sitting down placing her head in her hands. "I thought I was doing the right thing." 

Teagan went to comfort her, "you made a mistake." 

"A mistake that nearly cost you your life." She began to cry, "if anything happened to you I wouldn't have forgiven myself." I looked over at Alistair and raised an eyebrow as Teagan crouched on the floor in front of her and took her hand. "That didn't happen Isolde, it will be alright." Clearly they were a lot closer than just brother and sister in law. 

"Where's this Mage that poisoned the Arl?" 

"He's locked in the dungeon," she said "why? I had him tortured for information and he revealed nothing." 

"I need to speak to him"

Isolde told the guards to fetch the Mage from the dungeon. A short while later they brought him before us. "How much magic did you teach Connor?" I ask

"Only a small amount, the basics really. I didn't cause this."

"We know that, why did you poison the Arl?" 

"Loghain promised he would free the mages if I helped him rid the kingdom of enemies of the throne." 

"How is Eamon an enemy of the throne?" Alistair asked, "he's not tried to usurp it like Loghain." 

"What a pitiful specimen you are." Morrigan said to him. "This is what life in the tower does to these mages?" 

"Why did you runaway from the tower?" 

"They were going to make me tranquil." 

"Why?" 

"Because I am a blood Mage."

"Blood magic." Alistair muttered in disgust. 

"Is there a way to rid Connor of the demon other than killing him?" 

"You would have to confront the demon in the fade." He said

"And how would we do that?" 

"Normally it would take several mages and a lot of lyrium, I could do it without it but it would require someone sacrificing themselves." 

"Why would someone need to sacrifice themselves?" 

"The amount of blood required to hold the portal to the fade open means I can't use my own." 

"Why can't Morrigan do it and you sacrifice yourself?" 

"You can't be serious." Alistair exclaimed. 

"It needs to be a Mage that goes into the fade." Answered Morrigan before the Mage could answer. 

"Well there's only one thing to do." 

"I will sacrifice myself," said Isolde "this is as much my fault as it is his." 

"Elise you aren't." 

I give Alistair a look. "Do you really think I would do such a thing?" 

"Don't see why not," Morrigan interrupted. "She's willing." 

"Morrigan I wouldn't let you do it if you were willing." I tell her, "No we will go to the tower and get the mages." 

"It's only a days journey from here," Alistair said. "We can leave from the village docks." 

"But what about Connor?" 

"You Mage, what is your name?" 

"Jowan, my lady." 

"Is there anyway you can use your magic to prevent the demon taking control of Connor and everyone else?" 

"I'm not sure." 

"Morrigan?" 

"It's possible to set a trap for it." 

"What do you mean?" 

"A spirit cage. It can hold Connor and the demon in a stasis that should hold him for a time." 

"How long?" 

"I'm not sure, Jowan here will have to maintain it using whatever means necessary to ensure it doesn't collapse and he gain control." 

"I can do that," said Jowan, "let me try please." 

"Very well," I tell him. "Morrigan set the trap and Jowan keep him caged till we get back. Ban Teagan, Arlessa, We will return with the mages as quickly as possible." We leave as soon as Morrigan had set the trap and head back towards the village and towards Kinloch hold.


	10. Assisting the circle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group arrive at the circle to gain the help of the mages for Arl Eamon only to find all is not well. They must resolve the problems before anything can be done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always all backgrounds and characters belong to Bioware, this is just my view on what how the characters would interact.

One of the fisherman from Redcliffe was happy to take us across Lake Calenhad to the circle tower. I was hoping this was going to be a straightforward trip this time. Morrigan was protesting about the need to go there in the first place, “why do they let themselves be penned in like cattle?” 

“Morrigan, many of the mages were taken from their families as children. They didn’t have a choice to live any other way. If Flemeth hadn’t protected you and taught you herself then you could be in that very circle right now.”

“Fine, but surely there are other mages out there we can ask.” 

“Yes because apostate mages always make themselves known so templars can haul them off to the circle,” Alistair said sarcastically. 

“There are other mages out there that aren’t bound by the ridiculous restrictions of the chantry.” She said giving Alistair a withering look. “Only the chantry calls them apostates and you trained as a Templar, I’m sure you’d have happily hauled off mages to the circle.”

“Only you,” he told her, “ and don’t you mean us, not them, after all you are one.”

I stepped in before their bickering got worse. “There are other mages Morrigan but unless you have connections to some underground movement then we need to get help from the circle.”

“Fine, just make it quick.” 

“You can wait outside if you prefer, that way you don’t have to mix with any of those awful caged mages, the ones who were at Ostagar, you know where you and flemeth weren’t.”

She gave me an equal withering look but said nothing. Alistair smirked, “not a word.” I told him. He opened his mouth and then closed it again. Silence fell over the boat for the rest of the journey. I was relieved when we finally arrived. Alistair and Zevran went ahead whilst I thanked the fisherman. I turned to hear Alistair say: “what, but this is preposterous, you have to let us in.”

“It seems we have a problem my dear grey warden.” Zevran says as I walk up to the door. 

“What’s going on?”

“You can’t come in,” the Templar at the door says, “you need to turn back immediately.” 

“Well that’s not happening,” I tell him, “we need the help of the mages and they are duty bound to help the wardens in a blight. I have the treaties right here.”

“You better talk to the Knight Commander,” he says stepping aside after looking through the treaties. 

We walk into the entrance hall of Kinloch Hold and up to the Older gentleman standing in the middle of the room giving orders. “Are you the Knight Commander?” I ask. 

“Knight Commander Greagoir at your service,” he says giving me a polite bow. “May I ask how you got in here, we’ve stopped all trips to the hold till the current crisis is over.” 

“We were brought by a fisherman from Redcliffe.” I tell him, “what crisis?”

“Demons have taken over the circle, we have called for permission to use the right of annulment from the chantry in Denerim.”

“How did demons take over the circle?” Alistair asks

“I don’t really know, there was a meeting when the mages came back from Ostagar, then the next thing we knew there were demons everywhere, they’ve wiped out half my men.” 

“What is the right of Annulment?” I ask hoping that it’s not what I think it is.

“It’s when they are given permission to purge the circle.” Alistair says before Greagoir can say anything. “Another reason I was glad to leave.”

“Purge?” Leliana asks in horror, “as in kill all the mages?”

“We aren’t even sure there are any mages left.” Greagoir says. 

“Well hold fast Commander,” I tell him, “how about we go in and clear the place of demons and see if there are any survivors first.” 

“You?” He says, “I can’t let you do that.” 

“I’m not giving you a choice Commander I need the mages help not only for the blight but to help Arl Eamon.”

“The Arl of Redcliffe?” 

“Yes, it’s a long story and one I’ve no time to tell, let us go in and find survivors and deal with your demon problem”

“Once the doors are closed, I won’t be able to reopen them. Find first enchanter Irving. If he says it’s clear then I’ll re-open the doors.”

“Of course, is there anyone we can get some supplies from?”

“Yes, the quartermaster is in the far corner. He may have something you can use.”

I thanked him and walked over to the quartermaster. We stocked up on lyrium potions and some poultices, not knowing what we would find in there I’d rather have plenty of healing potions on hand. He also had some unusually carved rune stones that I noticed Alistair admiring so once he’d wandered off, I bought them too. 

They opened the door and we all trooped in, it was eerily quiet. Bodies strewn across the floor, we stepped into one of the sleeping quarters, furniture had been moved in an attempt to blockade the door. It hadn’t worked though, I couldn’t tell if it was demons or templars they’d tried to keep out. 

“What happened here?” Alistair asked. “How did demons take control?”

“We’ll find out soon enough.”

“Blood magic” Morrigan said simply

“You’d know all about that.” Alistair sniped

“Nothing wrong with it when used properly.” She retorted, “I don’t entertain spirits.”

“You mean Demons.” 

“Demons, spirits they are all the same to me.”

Alistair made talking gestures with his hands whilst pulling a face. Morrigan looked like she wanted to throttle him.   
“Are you sure you two don’t want us to guard the room while you work out your sexual tension?” Zevran asked. 

I laughed at the look of horror on both their faces, their bickering temporarily forgotten. We check each room in turn finding a similar scene in each one. At the end there was a door as and as we walked through we saw Wynne fighting off a rage demon. Alistair and Sten charged in as usual, I motioned to Morrigan to freeze it. “Why? They are managing fine by themselves.” 

“Morrigan,” I said in a warning tone. 

She sighed and froze the demon allowing Sten to shatter it with his blade. “They got themselves into this mess,” she said somewhat petulantly. 

“We need them,” I remind her. “We are all in this together are we not?”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to help you, I just don’t see why we are helping them,” she said. “ they used blood magic to summon demons and then couldn’t control them, this is entirely their own fault.” 

“Not all of them Morrigan, we need to find who's responsible for this, All there lives depend on us clearing this tower and stopping whatever this is.”

“Suit yourself,” she said

“Warden?” Wynne said when it was over. “How? We were told you were all dead.”

“If loghain had had his way we would have been.” I tell her, “fate or should I say Morrigan's mother intervened.” 

“Well I’m glad you're here, I’m not sure what you can do though, I put up this barrier in order to keep out the demons that have taken over the tower.”

“We’re here to clear them out.” 

“What?” She asked shocked, “you can’t possibly, we need help.”

“Wynne, they are waiting to hear from Denerim to evoke the rite of annulment.” 

“So it’s really over then.”

“What a defeatist attitude.” Morrigan interrupted. “You deserve what you get.”

“Morrigan.” I say getting annoyed. “You aren’t helping.” I turn to Wynne, “ you can’t just give up, I’m not giving up, how did this even happen?”

“After Ostagar Uldred came back to the circle saying how loghain would free the mages.” 

“Loghain would never free the mages.” Alistair said, “he would always say how they had their place but he never trusted them.”

“Ulric wouldn’t have listened, he called a meeting with all the senior mages told them that to end the blight we needed to work with loghain, I tried to get as many out as possible and put up this barrier.” 

“I’m sorry Wynne, but I’m going to have to get through there.”

She sighed, “I thought you were going to say that.” 

“We’ve cleared everything by the entrance if the rest of you go into those quarters and Barricade yourselves in you should be ok.” I told them, “don’t come out till we’ve come down with the first enchanter.” 

The mages took the younger ones and headed to the furthest point away from the barrier. I nodded to Wynne who brought down the barrier. A rage demon began to rise but Morrigan froze it, allowing Sten to shatter it. 

We moved round the tower clearing out demons and entranced templars before coming across a group of mages who attacked us. They used their own blood to summon demons to aid them. Wynne threw up a shield around us and Morrigan laid down a paralysing hex on the mages giving us time to deal with the demons. Sten and Alistair charged in. Sten swung his sword beheading two of the shades. Alistair shield bashed a desire demon knocking it back giving him enough opportunity to lunge driving his sword through it. Zevran threw a potion down creating a smoke which enabled him to sneak around another demon and flank it whilst Leliana sent in a barrage of arrows. 

Wynne kept up the barrier protecting us from most projectiles whilst Morrigan battled two the mages that had come round. She froze one and drained the life of the other. Wynne gave her a horrified look. “Would you prefer I let them attack you?” She asked her. 

“No, no,” she said, “it’s just blood magic got us into this mess.”

“Blood magic has its uses,” Morrigan told her simply. 

“We’re here to resolve the towers issues remember.” I remind them. “Morrigan's magic will not be an issue.” I tell Wynne, “she has no time for spirits or demons.” 

“I don’t need you defending me.” She said huffily. 

“Makers breath,” I mutter, “I will defend all my companions Morrigan whether they like it or not. Just accept it with good grace, I’m not demeaning you by doing so.” 

She opened her mouth to say something but thought better of it and closed it again. She was silent for the rest of the floor. We pass the store room on the way to the second floor and pass a mage sweeping up. “Owain,” Wynne says, “why are you here?” 

“It is safer for me to stay here and the place needs cleaned up.” 

“You don’t need to do that.” He tells him, “go down with the others, the way is clear now.” 

“I’d rather stay here” he says.

“Have you seen anyone else?” Wynne a asks

“Niall came by a few hours ago.”Owain said, “he got the litany of adralla from the store room.” 

“Was he going after Uldred?” 

“He didn’t say.” 

“Are you sure you want to stay here?” I ask, “We can escort you back to the others.” 

“I’ll be fine here.” 

“Stay Safe Owain,” Wynne says before leading us up the stairs, on the second floor we found rooms with most furniture turned upside down and more mages turning on one another, we manage to stop them, those who had used blood magic to summon demons to their aid ended up dead, those they had turned on we sent to where the others were. We had to pass through the main library where it looked like the tranquil were being held captive by demons even though they made no attempt to harm them. Once we rid the area of the demons one of the tranquil came up to us, “Thank you,” She said, “that was unpleasant.” 

“That was unpleasant?” Alistair asked, “that’s the reason the tranquil freak me out.” 

“They were not exaggerating when they said they are stripped of emotion.” Zevran remarked shuddering. 

“Which is why being made tranquil should be a last resort.” I say. 

“Here is Irving’s quarters,” Wynne says calling us over, “ I was hoping he was here.” 

“Maybe there is something here to say what happened? Or where they were taken.” Morrigan said. I look over at her looking over the first enchanters desk and then casting an eye over the bookcases. 

“I doubt it,” Wynne said, “but it doesn’t hurt to look.” We look around but find nothing so make our way out and head up towards the next floor. I notice that Morrigan had stayed behind, I suspected it was because she was looking for something. She wasn’t bothered about the tower till she realised we were in the first enchanters office. When she finally caught up with us I asked her, “did you find what you were looking for?”

“I did.” She says, “how did you know I was looking for anything?” 

“Lets just say I’ve come to know you quite well In the short time we’ve known each other.” 

As we move through the forth floor we come across enchanted Templars. “Will the enchantment wear off if we take out the demons?” I ask Wynne and Morrigan. 

“Usually,” Morrigan says “they aren’t going to just stand there and let you destroy the demon though.” 

“Which is why you are going to stop them whilst we take out the demons.” 

“and how am I going to do that without mortally wounding them?” She asked

“Haven’t you a paralysis hex or something?”

“That requires me to trap them in it.”

“Then move quickly and Zevran and I will draw them out.” I tell her. Morrigan managed to trap three Templars in a paralysis hex but there were more that weren’t. A few we managed to over power or knock unconscious. “I don’t envy his headache when he comes round” Alistair said as he dodged an attack, Zevran caused the Templar to stumble and he hit his head on the wall. 

“Don’t tell me, you meant to do that.” I say to him. 

“It is a happy coincidence my dear grey warden.” He replies. After defeating the demons in every room they went back and checked the Templars. One who Morrigan has caught in a hex had begun to come round, “what’s going on?” He asked, “who are you?” Then he spotted Wynne. “Wynne? Where is everyone? Where’s the knight commander?”

“It’s a long story,” she told him, “It’s Markus isn’t it?” 

“Yes,” 

“I thought I recognised you, you were with the Templars at Ostagar.” 

“Are they going to be alright?” I ask

Wynne checks him over and nods, “I believe so.” She turns to Markus, “though you need rest young man.” 

“I need to help the others.” He says. 

“We’ll bring the others to these quarters and you can all rest.” I say, “leave the rest of the tower to us”

“You don’t have our abilities.” He protested.

“They worked so well for you so far.” Morrigan says in a mocking tone. 

“Alistair is a trained Templar.” I tell him. “We’ll be fine, You are in no state to fight after your ordeal, any of you.” I left Leliana, Sten and ser woof a lot to watch over them, I wasn’t sure what the effects being under the demons control were and I didn’t want them following us and being further exposed. 

“That was a wise decision,” Morrigan says, “These Templars would only get in the way.” 

“We also don’t know what we will find, I can’t have these Templars stopping you using any necessary magic that is not particularly approved of by the charity.” 

She gave me a quizzical look but said nothing. I had been watching her and it wasn’t just the elements she called on, whatever Flemeth was she had taught Morrigan magic I had never seen before. I couldn’t risk the Templars trying to take away her powers when we needed them most. 

Wynne opened the door that had another library and led to the next floor. Inside stood a sloth demon, it was standing over the body of the Mage Owain had told us about. 

“Ah more visitors, I’d entertain but much effort is involved.”

“We wouldn’t want to inconvenience you.” Zevran says 

“What happened to him?” I ask pointing to the Mage lifeless on the floor. 

“He was tired,” the sloth demon says “aren’t you tired of all this fighting? Wouldn’t you prefer to just take it easy?” 

“I am feeling rather fatigued.” Wynne says. Before I know it I find myself in some grand halls. Duncan comes upto me. “Ah there you are, I’m not disturbing you am I?” 

“Disturbing me?” I ask confused. “Where are we?” 

“We are in wiesshaupt”

“The warden fortress?” I look around, “but I’ve never been to weisshaupt.”

“You are here now,” said Duncan, “I wanted to check you were happy here.”

“This isn’t real,” I say, “you died on the battlefield with the King.” 

“You are mistaken child.” We won the battle at Ostagar.” 

“No we didn’t, Loghain left you all to die, Alistair and I almost died.” I say drawing my sword. “Get away from me demon.” 

“Why did you have to ruin it?” He said. 

“I’ve a blight to end,” I say thrusting my sword through the demon before it could react. It disappears in front of me and then I start on the other demons who appear as wardens I had never met. A pedestal appeared and as I touched it I arrived at another area of the fade. A mage was standing looking around. “Oh so your trapped here too.” 

“Looks like it.” I say, “you’re the Mage I saw before I passed out.” 

“Niall,” He says, “I thought I could make a difference. I went to get the litany of adralla from owain and was on my way to the top of the tower when I was trapped by the sloth demon.”

“There is still time to make a difference.” I tell him, “what can you tell me about this place? Have you found a way out?”

“There is no way out,” he said, “you’d think so but see that pedestal over there? I’ve studied the runes on it. There signify different islands of the sloth demons domain, the sloth demon appears to be in the centre island but there is no way of getting there. 

I get him to show me, “what are these areas?” I ask

“They weren’t there before.” He said. “There must be more people trapped”.

“My companions,” I say, “I need to free them.”

“Good luck.” He says, “I’ve tried everything I could think of.” 

“Well you stay here if you wish but I’m not dying here and neither are my companions.” I walk through a purple haze and across a rage demon, a little Voice was shouting “help I just want to leave here.” 

I use my daggers to take out the demon from a safe distance and turn to see a mouse looking up at me. “Thank you,” it says. “ it’s too late for me but take my power and find a way to defeat yavinia the demon protecting this island, She is through a door that only demons can see, the key must be on one of the other islands.” 

I change into a mouse and go through the mouse hole that takes me to another area with a pedestal. I touch the pedestal and it takes me to another island, this time I was in the circle tower and there was fire everywhere. Using the mouse holes I run through to an area where a Templar dreamer was fighting a group of mages and demons. After helping him defeat them he tells me that the demon of this island is a rage demon and I need to find the way to him on one of the other islands. He grants me his ability to walk through fire unharmed. 

I go round each island in turn looking for dreamers and defeating mages, Templars, dark spawn and golems. Even though I’m exhausted I know I can’t rest yet. I’ve still got to find Alistair, Wynne, Morrigan and Zevran. I make my way back to Niall who asks what I’ve done as he has felt a change in the islands. 

I explain that I turned into a mouse, a golem, a spirit and a burning man. “You’ve been busy.” Niall says. 

“I told you I wasn’t going to die here.” 

“I was too afraid to try after visiting all the islands and finding my way blocked.” 

“It’s not your fault,” I tell him, “You have not been fighting darkspawn, demons and I can’t even begin to think what else for the past few months.” 

“How are you not afraid?” 

“I am afraid of losing my friends more,” I tell him. “Anger is a powerful motivator but even that isn’t enough. I’m exhausted. I’m not even sure I’ll be able to face these lesser demons guarding the islands. “ 

“Try this,” He says breaking off part of a plant and handing it to me. “Eat it, it will refresh you.” 

I do as I’m bade and immediately start to feel better, not as tired and stronger. “It’s raw Lyruim.” He says. “It’s all over this region.” 

“Thanks Niall, that’s really helped.”

“I’m glad to be of assistance.” 

“Let’s end this.”

“I’d like to help but I have no way of following you through the doors” He said 

“You’ve helped Niall,” I say 

“Go ahead and save the world then.” He says as I turn myself into sprit form and pass through the door coming face to face with a desire demon. After half an hour of battling with her, crumpled to the floor and turns to ash. I work my way through each island defeating each demon, The pride demon was one of the longest fights I had experienced by myself. It took my changing forms several times to take it down. When I was done I sat down feeling fatigued. I wasn’t sure if I could go on and then I spotted the lyrium plant and ate more of it’s leaves in order to revive myself. 

The pedestal appeared before me and I touched one of the areas that were lit. I was transported to a grove as I walked through I heard Morrigan arguing with what looked like Flemeth. As I came close she turned. “Where have you been?” She asked.

“Trying to find a way to free you all.” I said somewhat indignant at her annoyed tone. 

“Well clearly you’ve found one whilst I’ve been here having to endure this annoying spirit.” 

I look at the spirit who looks remarkably like Flemeth and then at Morrigan. “I’m not sure if this is meant to be a dream or a nightmare.” 

“Trust me it’s a nightmare, mother would have a fit if she saw this.” Then she paused, “or she may find it extremely funny.”

“You have a very odd relationship with your mother Morrigan.” I say 

Flemeth begins to interrupt until Morrigan stops it. “Shoo demon,” she says. “Can we go now?” 

“Yes Let’s.” 

“You can’t leave.” The demon Flemeth says. 

“Oh hush.” She says to it before clicking her fingers and freezing the demon and then using another spelling to turn it to vapour. 

“Really?” I say “you couldn’t have done that before now?”

“What and sit here by myself for hours alone?” She said, “I’d be bored by myself.” 

“I thought you’d have preferred the peace and quiet or you could have found me quicker by getting yourself out of this trap.” 

“I was waiting to see if you would rescue me.” She said. 

“Did you really think I wouldn’t?” 

“No, but it’s nice to see you did attempt to.” 

“Well thank you Morrigan,” I say somewhat sarcastically, “shall we go now?”

“I’m waiting for you to lead the way.” She says. 

We walk to the pedestal and as I touch it she disappears and I am transported to the next island. I walk down a path and find myself staring at Zevran who looks like he is being tortured, he is making jokes at his captors expense. As I get closer I realise that they must be crows and this was some sort of initiation. 

“Zevran,” I call 

“Elise?” He asks “you are not meant to be here.”

“This is the fade, Zevran, you need to come with me now.” 

“I can’t, this is my test, I’m going to become a crow, I need to show them I can tolerate pain.”

“Zevran you are already a crow and you left the crows. Don’t you remember?” 

“That cannot be And yet I know you are telling the truth. Is this some kind of bad dream? A memory?” 

“I do believe he’s questioning us.” One of the crows says. 

“We will have to punish him for that.” The other added. 

“Oh do be quiet.” I say knocking one over and slicing them across the throat then throwing my other dagger into the heart of the other. Once they had disappeared I untied Zevran. 

“Well that a relief.” He says “that is not something I wish to relive.”

“Is that what the crows do to those that wish to join?” I ask

“Yes, they break your will and mold you to their way.” 

“Oh Zevran,” I hug him impulsively. I am genuinely shocked that anyone would have to go through such a thing. As much as Zevran boasted about being an assassin I knew his heart wasn’t really in it. They had put him through enough and I knew then that I wouldn’t let them come near him again. 

Zevran returned the hug before asking me what was wrong. “I just wish you hadn’t had to go through all of that.” I say.

“It was that or carrying on as a prostitute.” He said 

“Well you don’t have to do either ever again.” I tell him. “Should we all get through this blight then you can do whatever you wish.” 

“Hmm that is something to ponder at least.” He said, “shall we get out of here? I am suddenly feeling like I want to be as far away as possible.” 

Once again I touch the pedestal and am transported to another island whilst Zevran disappears. This time it’s Wynne I find surrounded by dead mages with her crying saying it’s all her fault. It takes me quite a bit of time to get her to realise that we are in the fade and she is dreaming. I dread to think if this was a memory like Zevran’s or a horrible nightmare. After freeing Wynne I’m transported to the final Island where I’m wondering what I’m going to find. 

What I find surprises and saddens me. Alistair is sat at a table surrounded by children and a woman is fussing over him. I walk up and ask if he’s alright. 

“Oh there you are,” he says, “I was wondering where you had got to. This is my sister Goldana, and these are her children.” 

“Your sister?” I ask, “you never mentioned a sister before.” 

“It’s because I’ve just found out about her.” 

“And we are so glad you did brother.” Says goldana. 

“Well it’s nice in a way that you thought of me in this little fantasy.” I say

“What do you mean fantasy?” He asks

“This isn’t real Alistair, we are in the fade.” 

“Of course it’s real.” 

“Think Alistair, where were we last?”

“Last thing I remember we were in the circle tower, oh.” The crestfallen look on his face makes me want to put my arms around him. 

“You are not taking my brother away from me.” The demon says

“Hands off Demon,.” I say, “he’s mine, you’ll never have him.” Next thing we find ourselves fighting off several shades and a desire demon. Or rather I did as Alistair seemed to be in shock. “Alistair,” I shout, “Some help would be nice” 

“Sorry,” He said snapping out of his dreamlike state and blocking the desire demons attack before driving his sword into its side. “Are you alright?” He asks

“I’m fine, are you?” 

“Yes I’m fine, just don’t tell anyone about how easily I was fooled will you.”

“Your secret is safe with me Alistair,” I tell him, “you weren’t the only one, Morrigan was the only one other than myself who saw through it.” 

“Oh that’s comforting.” He said “I’m sure you think I’m a fool now too.” 

“Because your desire for a family who loves you unconditionally is so strong that a desire demon used it to their advantage?” I ask,” no if anything it helps me understand you better.”

“Understand why I’m so pathetic you mean.”

“I’ve never thought you’re pathetic.” I told him, “nor a fool, I wish you’d stop putting yourself down. There’s nothing wrong with wanting people to care for you without there being some sort of hook attached.” I take his hand and lead him towards the pedestal. “You aren’t the only one.”

“What do you mean?” 

“Look at the people we travel with Alistair, look closely. Morrigan hides her compassion is a brusque exterior but she’s gone out of her way to protect us both more than once. She doesn’t know how to behave around people because she’s had no experience of it. It’s why she runs away from her life in the wilds as much as she runs back to it.”

“She’s still a bitch.” 

I sigh, nothing I say is going to make those two get on with each other. “Let’s go,” I say, “we can carry on this discussion once we’re out of here.” 

I touch the pedestal once more and find myself back in front of Niall. “Did you do it?” He asked 

“I’ve defeated the demons protecting the islands and freed my companions.” I tell him. “Now to face the sloth demon and rid these area of the fade of his grasp at least. “

“Well don’t linger on my account,” he says. 

I head back to the pedestal and am transported to the sloth demons chamber. As I arrive my companions are waiting and looking around. “Where have you been?” Morrigan asked in a disapproving tone. 

“Where are we?” Zevran asked. 

“I was rescuing everyone,” I tell Morrigan before answering zevran, “this must be the sloth demons domain. 

“Oh goody,” Morrigan said sarcastically. 

“Well I for one would like to get out of here” Zevran said, “The sooner the better yes?”

“I agree,” Wynne said, “We’ve still got to stop Ulred” 

Just then the sloth demon appeared, “you have some Gaul.” He said, “but it is time for you all to leave this place.” 

“You tried to keep us apart and you failed,” says Wynne, “ you cannot stand against us.”

“If you go back quietly, I’ll do better this time.” The sloth demon said. “I can make it so you are happy.” 

“Are you going to let it keep talking?” Morrigan asks

“I do not wish to be a plaything,” Zevran says, “Not of a demon at any rate.”

“No I’m not letting it keep talking Morrigan, I’m waiting for you to hex it or something. You’re the Mage.”

“Oh I see this is all because I didn’t free myself from that stupid trap isn’t it?” She grumbled before casting her magic to imprison the sloth demon in a spirit cage. It only worked for a short while as it changed form. Just as we thought we were close to defeating the sloth demon it changed form again. 

“Is this thing ever going to die?” Alistair asked. 

“It seems to have taken on the forms of the demons of each island”

“How many were there?” Zevran asked

“Five.”

“How many times has he changed forms?” 

“I wasn’t keeping count were you?” Alistair asked

“Four,” Wynne says bringing up a shield to protect us from the rage demon forms attacks. “What was the last demon you fought?”

“Pride demon.” 

“Aren’t they those the ones the size of ogres?” Alistair asks

“Yes.”

“And you took it out by yourself?”

“Didn’t have much choice,” I say. 

“Impressive,” Zevran said

“I’ve always thought you were impressive.” Alistair says “I mean because you are a good leader and...”

“Maybe you can flatter her once we are out of here.” Wynne says 

Alistair huffed, “I wasn’t trying to flatter her.”

“I’ll pretend you didn’t say that,” I say whilst dodging a swipe. 

“I didn’t..” Alistair began to get flustered 

It took a further hour of fighting before we finally killed the sloth demon and appeared back in front of Niall. “You did it then.” He said

“Yes, we did it.” I say, “we can all leave here now.”

“Not me,” He says his tone etched with sadness. “I’ve been here too long. This place sucks the life out of you the longer you are here.”

“Are you saying you won’t wake up?” 

“All because I tried to be a hero.” He said ruefully, “Guess one man can’t make a difference.” 

“You would have made a difference Niall.” I tell him, “you still can, what does the litany of adralla do?” 

“It protects you from blood magic,” Niall says, recite it in front of the mages and whatever Ulric is trying to do should stop it. It’s in the pocket of my robes.” 

“Thank you Niall,” I say before heading to the portal that has opened up. As I step out the fade the others are crowded around me. “Elise,” Alistair says gently trying to shake me awake.” 

“I’m fine Alistair.” 

“Oh thank the maker.” He helps me up and I check Niall’s robes for the Litany. “Wynne is this it?” I ask handing her a scroll. 

“Yes, Let’s hurry.” She says, we just need to get to the top floor. It’s through this door and up the stairs.” 

As we come through the door we find a Templar surrounded by a barrier, at first he doesn’t believe we are even real and then he recognises Wynne. “You poor boy, you must be exhausted.” 

“How did you escape Uldred?” He asks

“I was on the ground floor with the children.” She says. “Where is the first enchanter? 

“He was taken upstairs with the other mages.” The Templar says. “But you can’t trust any of them, they’ll all use blood magic and turn to demons.” 

“They aren’t all that way,” Alistair says, “you can’t judge all mages the same.” 

“I’d never have thought I’d hear Alistair say anything nice about mages.”Morrigan says

“I’ve met some perfectly nice mages.” He tells her, “they weren’t all uncivilised shrews living in the woods like you “ 

“Andraste preserve me,” I say, “you two squabble more than children.” Turning to the Templar I ask “what’s your name?

“Cullen,” he says, “ but if your going up there you need to purge the tower of the mages, none can be saved or you doom us all.”

“Cullen I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve been through but I’m not carrying out the right of annulment, I’ve the litany of adralla.”

“Maybe we should leave him here,” Morrigan says.

“as much as I hate to agree with her,” Alistair says, “we can’t let him just rush in and get himself killed. We don’t know what we’re going to find up there.” 

“Very well.” I say. “ this will be over soon Cullen.” 

“I hope you realise what your doing,” he says. “You’re putting everyone at risk.” 

I shake my head as head up the stairs, whatever he’d been through has made him hate all mages. In the room at the top of the tower we find mages in groups all bound with Uldred standing in the centre with two demons and a mage you was bound. We watched in horror as he performed some type of ritual and turned the Mage into another demon. 

We didn’t wait for him to notice us, we went straight on the attack. “Don’t forget the litany,” Wynne called sending a bolt at the demons surrounding Uldred. 

With the others battling Uldred who transformed into a grotesque demon, I kept reciting the litany to prevent Ulric from transforming any more mages into demons. The others soon had Uldred overpowered, Morrigan had slowed him down using various hex’s and spells to hold him in place whilst Zevran and Alistair flanked him. Wynne used a combination of spells and putting up protective barriers around Alistair and Zevran. When he fell, Wynne went to check that the mages were all alright whilst Alistair and Zevran checked he was dead. “Irving?” Wynne called

“I’m here,” he said, “thank the maker you got here when you did.” Wynne helped him up as Alistair and Zevran and I helped the others to their feet. Morrigan moved water to the exit as if she couldn’t bring herself to be associated with any of the circle mages. 

“Thank the wardens for insisting on saving the tower.” Wynne said, “They were waiting on the rite of annulment from Denerim.” 

“You have my gratitude,” he said bowing towards me and Alistair. 

“I just go where she tells me.” Alistair says. 

“He’s just being modest,” I say, “he wouldn’t have allowed them to carry it out either.”

“We better get to Greagoir immediately and tell him the issues within the circle are now resolved.” 

On the way back down we gathered Sten, Leliana, ser pounce a lot and all the Templars, mages and tranquil and trooped to the main doors. Cullen was walking way back from both the mages and his Templar brethren. He clearly didn’t trust any of them. I wasn’t sure how he was going to carry out his duties any longer. 

 

We banged on the door to be let out. “We have the first enchanters with us,” I call

“I’m here Greagoir,” Irving says. 

“Thank the maker,” Greagoir says opening the doors, “is the tower cleared?” 

“Yes all demons are vanquished and these are the survivors. You may have to employ a gentle touch for a while whilst they come to terms with their ordeal.” I say

“You can’t trust any Mage,” Cullen says suddenly pushing his way the group. “They are susceptible to demons taking over them.”

“I will decide what needs to be done, “ Greagoir says, “the first enchanter is safe and I will accept his word as well as that of the wardens.” 

“Cullen may take longer to come to terms with what happened than the rest.” I tell Gregoir, “when we found him he was not in the best state, he has a strong will but I fear he may have come to hate all mages because of Uldred.” 

“I will keep a close eye on him.” He says, “is there anything else you need of me?” 

“I need some of the mages to travel rather urgently to Redcliffe to help us enter the fade in order to save the Arl.” 

“Then you need to speak to Irving.” He said, “our job is to oversee the mages and look out for their welfare but it is Irvin that has the last say on what the mages do or don’t do.” 

“Thankyou Knight Commander” I say before giving him a bow and turning to Irving.”

“I heard what you said to Greagoir.” He says, “I will travel with a small group of mages and Templars to Redcliffe at once.” 

“Thankyou.” I say before heading out of the tower. Greagior had Cullen take us across to the other side of lake Callahad. He was silent for most of the trip. Though we were all silent for most of the trip. It had been a lot to take in. “There is good and Ill in us all,” I say, “which side we let out is our choice, we all have had things happen that have defined who we are, don’t allow what happened to you turn you against your fellow Templars or the mages who survived. Not all magi resort to summoning demons.” 

“I know what your trying to do warden.” He said, “But you weren’t there, you don’t know what I went through.”

“You are correct, I don’t but we.” I look around the boat.”every single one of us have lost people we care about, have gone through situations no one else would understand.”

“No one escapes this life without scars my friend,” Zevran said joining in the conversation. “It’s your choice if you allow it to break you.” 

“You became a Templar because you wanted to make a difference no?” Liara asked him 

“Yes, I’ve always wanted to be a Templar and help people.” He said, “I was good at it too, I kept the magi safe. Until now.” 

“Remember your reasons,” Leliana said, “don’t let one man sour the good in you. I know how easy that can be.” 

Before Cullen can ask Wynne says,” you were always Kind Cullen, honourable, don’t let what Uldred did make you forget about those you cared for.” 

He looked at Wynne, “you were the one who told me that I shouldn’t get too close to her, that I shouldn’t mix duty with pleasure, if I hadn’t listened to you she may still be alive.” 

“Who's he talking about?” I ask

“Her name was Letta amell.” He said, “she was dragged off to the top of the tower along with the other mages and she wasn’t with the ones you rescued.” 

“That was on Uldred, Cullen. There were many magi that fought against the demons, that didn’t give in to Uldred.” Wynne told him, “letta included, she wouldn’t want you punishing yourself because of it,” she paused before saying, “she told me to mind my own business you know, said that you would never not carry out your duty because you cared for someone.” 

“Sounds like someone else I know,” I say looking at Alistair. 

“She said that?” Cullen asked

“She was very strong willed.” 

Cullen smiled. “Yes, yes she was.”

“Sounds like someone else we all know,” Alistair said grinning at me. 

“Alright, Warden I will do my utmost not to hold all the magi in the circle responsible.” He said, “I will still be more vigilant for blood mages though.” 

“Time to disembark,” I say before Morrigan had a chance to say anything. We bid Cullen goodbye and head up lake Calenhad.


	11. The Arl of Redcliffe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group head back to Redcliffe to confront the demon in the fade and save the Arl, they are hoping that the pinch of Ashes they acquired will cure him of the poison Jowan gave him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always all characters and backgrounds belong to bioware. This is just my version of the events is the Warden had been a female noble.

Walking around lake Calenhad I noticed Sten looking around, “is everything alright sten?” 

“It was here we were overrun by darkspawn,” He said, “I lost my sword here.” 

We look about and find the place Sten and his men were ambushed. There was a man scavenging, “excuse me?” I ask, “have you seen any quanari swords lying about?” 

“What’s a Quanari?” The man asks 

“I am.” Sten tells him

“Andraste’s flaming knickers, you some sort of giant?” 

“They are a tall people,” I tell him, “it would be a big sword.” 

“No, I’ve not seen any but the bloke who sold me this spot probably took everything,” he said, “I should of known it was a scam.”

“Where did he go?” 

“He was outside Orzammar the last I saw him.” He said. 

“Thank you,” I said before turning to Sten. “We will travel to Orzammar once we’ve rid Connor of that demon and healed Eamon with the ashes.”

“I don’t hold out much hope that he has it,” he says, but thank you for being willing to look.” 

“Even if he doesn’t have it, he’ll know where it is.” I say, “Don’t worry Sten we’ll find it. Was it a gift?” 

“No, Asala is a part of me,” He said, “A warrior without his sword.”

“ is missing a vital part of themselves,” I say interrupting him. “I understand completely. If I lost this” I tapped the hilt of mine. “It wouldn’t be the same, you get used to the balance and the way it feels when you swing it. Nothing else feels right.” 

“Yes.” He says “you are not as callow as I thought.” 

“What, you thought I was callow?” I’m feeling a little insulted. 

“I was wrong,” he says as if that would make me feel better.

“Thank you I think.” We make our way to Redcliffe not stopping for rest, I wanted to get rid of the demon possessing Connor as quickly as possible. I wasn’t even sure what we would find or how long we’d been at the tower. When we arrived at the castle Irving, five other magi and two Templars were preparing the lyrium required to open a portal into the fade. “Oh thank the maker you’ve arrived.” Ban Teagan said, “Jowan has managed to keep the demon from fully possessing Connor, but we aren’t sure how long he’s going to hold out.” 

“First enchanter,” I say, “are you ready?”

“We’re ready, who is going in?” He asks “it needs to be a mage.” 

I look at Morrigan, “why does it have to be me?” She asked

“Jowan is preventing the demon from taking control, Wynne is more skilled in healing magic and the other Magi are holding the portal open. You are the only one who can do go.” 

“Fine,” She huffed, “I’m only doing this because I’m the only one who isn’t at risk of being possessed.” 

“Another reason you’re the only one who can go.” I say. 

“Let’s get it over with,” Morrigan says nodding her head at the magi who opened the portal. They watched as she stepped into the fade and disappeared. “She’s rather prickly isn’t she.” Irving says

“That would be putting it mildly.” Alistair muttered. 

“I imagine most of it is an act,” he said, “she strikes me as one who isn’t used to being around others.”

“She’s had a rather secluded life.” I say. 

“How long will this take?” Zevran asks, “I’m wondering if I have time for a nap.” 

I look across at Isolde who is sat on the steps being comforted by Ban Teagan, I look round the room and see mostly exhausted men and women. “She won’t be long,” I tell him, “we’ll rest once Arl Eamon is cured.”

“If she doesn’t become possessed herself.” Alistair said huffily. 

“Alistair, Morrigan is not so easily persuaded.” I tell him, “you didn’t see her in the tower, she would never allow herself to be possessed.” 

“You have a lot of faith in the young woman.” Irving says

“Morrigan has been trained by Flemeth.” I tell him, “I trust she knows what she’s doing.” 

“Flemeth?” He asks, “I have a grimoire of hers locked in my room, or did until the tower was over run.” 

“Is anything missing?” I ask knowing now that the grimoire was what Morrigan was searching for. 

“I’ve not had the opportunity to check.” He replies. 

“Thank you for doing this.” I say changing the subject.

“It was the right thing to do.” He says bowing his head, Just then Morrigan steps out the fade. “It is done.” She says. 

“My Connor is free?” Isolde asks

“Is you call being a mage who can’t control his powers then yes he is free.” Morrigan replied Isolde ran off towards the bed rooms to find Connor, she found him sat playing with some toy knights. “Is father better?” He asks

“He will be,” I tell him, after Morrigan stepped out the fade, I’d given the ashes to Irving who was up in Arl Eamons room with Teagan and Alistair. 

“You have something that will help him?” He asks

“We found the sacred ashes of Andraste.” I tell him “we think they will cure your father.” 

“Thank you,” Isolde said, “for everything.” 

“Thank me by putting your issues with Alistair to one side.” I say, “you’re all the family he has. You must know by now that Alistair was Marics son.”

“Alistair was Maric’s son?”

“You were never told?”

“I thought Eamon had a child with a serving girl, the rumours were…”

“Alistair is Eamon’s and Teagan’s nephew.” I tell her, “Orlesians and their saving face, I’m not surprised Alistair is the way he is with the amount of secrets in this family.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t know.” She said, “I feel terrible that I thought badly of him.” 

“Then you have some making up to do.” I say before leaving the room and going to find the others, I thought it would have been prudent to give Alistair time with his family. 

An hour or so later he came down with Eamon and Teagan in tow. He pulled me aside and said, “Isolde just hugged me before thanking me for everything.” 

“Maybe she’s realised she was wrong about you.” I say

“You had something to do with it didn’t you?” He asks.

“I may have said something.” I tell him. Eamon comes up just then, “so you are the person I have to thank for saving my family and my life.” He says

“Your Nephew has a great deal to do with it.” I say.

“He said it was you.” 

“He doesn’t like to take credit for anything.”

Eamon smiles as Alistair made his excuses and left the room, “he’s always been like that, even as a small boy, he doesn’t take after his father. I understand that a mage is responsible for poisoning me.” 

“Seems Loghain promised the mages freedom if he poisoned you.” 

“And Connor?”

“Your son is a mage your grace,” I tell him, “Isolde tried to hide it because she didn’t want him going to the circle.”

“Connor is a mage?” Eamon asks “how did I not know.” 

“We all see what we want to see your grace,” I say “What are you going to do with Jowan?”

“As the injured party I don’t feel I can be unbiased in this case.” He says, “if you have something you’d like to say about it, I would take your recommendation.”

“Jowan did poison you but he also prevented Connor from becoming fully possessed.” I tell him, “my recommendation would be to hand him back to the circle till after the blight and then have him escorted to weisshaupt to become a grey warden.”

“You’d have him become a grey warden?” Alistair asks walking back into the room “he’s a maleficar.”

“You know the grey wardens don’t turn away mages because they use blood magic.” I tell him, “he says he wishes to make amends, if he survives the joining he will by helping build the grey wardens.” 

“It does seem to be the most suitable solution,” he says “ I will inform the first enchanter immediately.” 

The Arl set us up with rooms and said for us to stay the night get a hot meal and a hot bath. Alistair came up to me in the stables whilst I was brushing the horses down. 

“Can I talk to you?” he asks after watching me for a few minutes. 

“Anything wrong?”

He beckons me away from the stables. “I want to discuss what happened today.”

“You saw, everyone is fine Alistair, it all worked out.”

He pulled me into his arms and kisses me, I'm not sure if I stumble because of the surprise that he kissed me in the first place consider the last couple of times I kissed him he’s shied away from me or how passionate it is. I find myself kissing him back, desire beginning to wash over us both and it's several minutes before we manage to disentangle ourselves. 

“Well, that was unexpected” I tell him. Shocked at just how much I wanted more. “who knew you had such hidden talents.”

“What? Oh,” he smiled “I wanted to say thank you, just saying it didn't seem adequate for how much I appreciate what you have done for them. You saved them all, Connor, Eamon even Isolde.”

“Oh that. Anytime Alistair, I wasn't going to let Isolde sacrifice herself if there was another way and it wasn’t just me that saved them.”

“I know, but you were the one who made the decision not to just allow Isolde to sacrifice herself or just go after Connor and force the demon out and that's what I love about you. I feel I owe Eamon and his happiness is important to me.”

“Wait wait, go back. What was that first part?”

He smiled “I know it may sound strange considering we haven't known each other very long, but I've come to care for you a great deal, Maybe it's because we've been through so much together or maybe it’s just because you are an incredible woman, that I love you and I wanted you to know that. I don’t know if you feel the same or if it’s not the right time for you after what happened with Roland but..

I interrupt him “when I arrived at Ostagar I was just wanting to find my brother, then I met you, I didn’t expect to feel this way,” I tell him, “Just being you helped me love again when I didn’t think it was possible. I love you too Alistair.” He gives me that smile, that smile that sets alight the flame of desire that is threatening to engulf me. He pulls me in and kisses me again, with a passion I hadn't experienced before, he slips One arm round my waist pulling me so close to him I can feel his heartbeat whilst the other supports my head as he explores my mouth with his tongue. I allow myself to be swept along. I gently tease him by sucking on his tongue and then biting his lip which he responds with a moan and pulls me into him tighter. I don't know how long we were standing there wrapped up in each other. But when he finally releases me he has the biggest smile. He takes me hand and we walk back up the castle steps and through the main hall. Bann Teagan greets us noting the smile on our faces and our linked hands. 

“I was just coming to find you warden, My brother wishes to speak to you.” He says “But I can tell him you and Alistair are discussing official warden business.” 

“I will go and speak to him.” I say and leave Alistair and Teagan, I notice him giving Alistair a congratulatory clap on the back. “You have good taste, and are a good match, I leave them talking as I head for the study where one of the servants directs me too. “Aah Warden,” He said, “I Wanted to speak to you about Alistair and we didn’t really get the opportunity earlier.” 

“What about him?” I ask

“Has he made you aware of his heritage?” 

“I worked it out for myself,” I tell him. “But yes he did mention it.” 

“You realise what that means of course.” 

“Alistair is heir to the throne.” I say “he is aware of that, not that’s what he wants.” 

“We don’t always get what we want,” Eamon says, “he is a Therien and it is his duty.” 

“Alistair would never abandon his duty,” I tell him, “he could have run after Ostagar but he didn’t, you give him little credit.”

He raised an eyebrow but said nothing for a moment, “you are fond of my nephew.” He says

“Eamon if I may be blunt.” 

“By all means.”

“I love your nephew and I feel that he is the man he is despite his family. “You set him on the path he is on because he couldn’t see any other way out and despite all that he still respects you.”

“You have much of your parents in you.” Eamon says with a small smile, “I regret allowing Alistair to be sent away and I regret not telling Isolde the truth. I have had quite an ear bashing from her believe me, also thanks to you I believe. What I wanted to say is I’m glad Alistair has you,” he opens the desk drawer and pulls out an amulet.” This was Alistair’s mother’s, she gave it to him before she went back to the circle.” 

“The circle? I thought Alistair’s mother was a serving girl?”

“No she was a mage and a grey warden, something happened that removed the taint from her and so she went back to the circle. Maric agreed to her wish of saying it was a servant who had died in childbirth and I agreed to take him in.” 

“And have him grow up as a stable boy with the other servants,” 

“It was a necessary deception at the time,”

“A convenient one.” I say, “and now Alistair is no longer a threat to the throne but is instead the only way of taking it back.”

“Yes,” Eamon says, “despite what you think of me warden, I want you to know that I do care what happens to Alistair. Please give him this.”

“You repaired it,” I say, “Alistair said he broke it when you visited him for the last time in the chantry.”

“He was so angry.”

“I know Alistair can be quite petulant.” I say, “but you gave up on him too easily.”

“A mistake I know you won’t make.” Eamon says. “And one I’ll try not to make again.”

During the evening I see the Alistair that he had the potential to be. He was more confident, full of witty remarks and was even nice to Morrigan. As I was headed to bed, she called me over “Alistair is looking rather pleased with himself.”

“Yes, Well we saved his family and he’s very grateful.”

“Showed it you too by the look on your face.”

“Oh yes, he definitely knows how to show his appreciation.”

She laughed, “well the little Templar has grown up at last and knows how to surprise our leader”

I grinned at her, “oh he does, goodnight Morrigan.” 

I head to the room Alistair is in, I knock and he answers in just his breeches. I knew he was strong but standing there with a bare chest I can see just how muscular he is. I put my hand on his chest and push him him inside and close the door. “Can't have anyone else see you like that,” I tell him. “They'll want you too themselves.”

“What? Oh,” he laughs. “I only have eyes for you,” he says. “Was there something you needed me for.”

“What? Oh yes, I came here for a reason. Seeing you almost derobed distracted me.” I run my hand over his chest. He draws his breath in sharply and I pull him in and kiss him. I can feel him stir as he wraps his arms round me and he kisses me harder and more passionately. I can feel how much he desires me and I want him. Suddenly he pulls away. 

“What's wrong?”

“I'm sorry,” he says, “I do want you, but I don't think I'm ready and I don't want to mess this up. Most men I know would jump at the chance to be with you but...”

“Alistair it's ok. I'm not going anywhere. If you aren't ready to.. “

He interrupts me.. “You aren't put off?”

“We'll take it slowly. We don't need to rush, nothing can put me off you.   
I didn't come here for that anyway. I actually came to give you this.” And I hand him an amulet.

“My mother's amulet? Where did you get it?”

“Your Uncle gave it me to give to you. Had it in his study drawer.”

“But I broke it.”

“He fixed it Alistair., you meant more to him than he let on. Just as he means more to you than you like to admit at times, family trait it seems.”

“Thank you.” He begins fiddling with the clasp. “Here I'll do it,” I say taking it off him and placing round his neck. “I’ll have to talk to him about it.”

“That’s not the only thing you need to talk to him about.” I say. 

“What do you mean?”

“What were you told about your mother?”

“Not much, just she was a serving girl.” He says, “I found out later that she already had a daughter.” 

“This sister who was on your dream in the fade.”

“Yes that,” he says “can we forget that ever happened.”

“It could have been worse,” I tell him, “ you could have been dreaming that you and I were pursuing some carnal pleasures.”

“What? Maker's breath what kind of man do you take me for?”

“Our dreams are our unconscious thoughts, desires and fears.” 

“Then what does your dream in the fade say about you?”

“That I wish things had turned out differently,” I shrug, “but if they had I may not have got to know you as well or fallen in love with you and I cannot regret that.”

“I don’t regret that either.” He says, pulling me into his arms. “Stay with me tonight, please.”

I climb into bed next to him. I place my head on his chest a listen to his heart beat. He idly runs his hands through my hair. We talk about childhood memories when he was in this castle last and eventually fall asleep curled around each other. It was the first night I sleep without having any nightmares instead I dream of us. A blight free ferelden and taking him home to Fergus. When I awoke Alistair was looking at me with an adoring expression. “Maker's breath but your beautiful.”

I smile up at him, “good morning my prince.”

“You’re never going to stop saying that now are you?”

“Not unless you are king then I'll think about it.” We get into our armour and head down for breakfast before heading out. 

“Where are you headed next?” Eamon asks. 

“Orzammar is our next stop as it's nearer only a few days journey from here. Then after that we will need to find the Dalish. How long will it take to set up the lands meet? “

“A while yet. I'll sent out knights to various banns and will travel to Denerim to set things in motion. “

“Then we will get on with gathering an army . I hope you can get loghain to see sense but I won't hold my breath.”

“Maker watch over you Eamon,” Alistair says. 

“He sent you and lady Elise Alistair, he has been. Take care of her,” he said quietly into his ear unaware that I heard him. I smile when he tells him he will. 

We mount our horses, Sten and leliana preferring the carriage bodan and sandel were driving. We set off and I watch as Morrigan turns herself into a bird and takes off. On our way to the Orzammar we come across a merchant who’d lost his mule, after helping him find it and seeing what he had for sale, he offered us a control rod for a golem. He tells us it’s in Honneleath and that it would be far more valuable to us than him. 

“How much do you want for it?” I ask, “oh nothing,” he replies, “you were good enough to help me look for my Bessie.”

“Is there anything else I’m supposed to do with this?” 

“Oh there is a few words your supposed to say to activate it. Let me see what was it now? Ah yes Duleth gar”

“This will be most helpful, thank you.”

“I must warn you it may not work, the dwarf I got it from said he got it from the owner. You could always see if he’s still about. If you have any problems with it” 

As we leave the area Alistair asks; “are we really going to go fetch a golem?”

“It may be worth seeing if it at least works.” I tell him. 

“And if it does?” Wynne asks. 

“We take it with us. A golem against darkspawn would give us an advantage. “

“If you say so,” Alistair says doubtfully. 

We take a detour to Honnleath, when we get there the town is overrun with darkspawn. “For the grey Wardens,” Alistair shouts charging at them. “I wish he wouldn’t do that,” Zevran says running after him. Leliana began firing arrows from the cart, woof a lot and sten joined the fray. Morrigan turned herself into a bear and knocked a grenlock into a group of darkspawn scattering them in all directions. It reminded me of the game Orriana would play with Oren, involving knocking down pegs with a wooden ball. A hurlock had managed to flank Alistair so I distracted it with a dagger in its shoulder then Zevran sliced clean through it. I retrieved the dagger and nodded to Zevran. Once the darkspawn outside where cleared we looked around for any sign of the villagers. 

Morrigan was standing in front of the golem. “Aren’t they meant to be ten foot tall?” She asked

We all gathered round and examined it, “it does seem rather short for a golem.”

“Do you think it was made like that?” Alistair asked. 

“It is covered in marks as if it’s had bits chipped off.” Zevran said running his hand over the Golem. 

“Maker, why would someone do that?” Leliana asked

“I think we need to see if this owner is somewhere about with an explanation.” I reply. “But first lets see if this thing works.” I hold out the control rod and say the words “duleth gar” nothing happens. I try again in case I pronounced it wrong but still nothing happens. 

“He did say it might not work.” Alistair reminds me. 

“Let’s see what the owner has to say.” We check out the last house that happens to be the largest building, as I open the door both Alistair and I say; “darkspawn.”   
There are several in the main entrance, fighting in a confined space was difficult, Morrigan froze a couple and Alistair shield bashed another into the wall, Zevran and I engaged in some dirty fighting tactics to knock the last two off their feet and finish them off. 

We make our way down the narrow passage and out into what looked like a lab. There were several tables with potions and crystals on them with steps down into a bigger room where several villagers stood behind what looked to be a magic barrier of some sort. 

Leliana shot an arrow into the shriek that was trying to claw its way through the barrier getting its attention, as it spun round Sten took its head off with one swing of his sword. Once all the darkspawn had been dealt with we walk up to the barrier. 

“Oh thank the maker, we’re saved.” Said a villager. 

A man not much older than Fergus spoke; “you weren’t sent by the bann were you? To save us?”

“I’m afraid not,” I tell him “a civil war has broken out, I’m afraid no one knew you were in trouble.”

“Then why are you here?” 

I show him the control rod. 

“Oh I might have guessed, this is about shale”

“Shale?”

“That Golem has given us nothing but trouble, my mother sold the rod years ago when it killed my father and good riddance.”

“Do golems go berserk and kill those it’s not commanded too?”

“How should I know, my father was its master and it killed him. My father was Wilhelm, mage to the arls of Redcliffe and hero of the war with orlais. 

“Your father was that Wilhelm?” Alistair asked “Eamon would tell me stories of him and his father during the orleasian rebellion. That’s the golem in the stories?”

“Yes, father took it everywhere, mother hated it and had my father cut it down to size.”

“That explains the chips all over it.” Zevran says. 

“Well it could be useful killing darkspawn.” I tell him “however the control rod doesn’t seem to be working. Is the incantation correct?” I tell him what it was. 

“No, mother must have given the wrong Saying in the hope that no one could use it.” He looks back towards a passage behind him and pauses. “I’ll give you the correct saying if you go look for my daughter, she disappeared deeper into my fathers lab and I don’t know what’s down there, I’ve tried calling her but I’ve not heard anything for the last few hours.”

“Is there something in that lab as to why you don’t want to look?” Zevran asks

“I had to keep the barrier up.”

“Of course you did,” Morrigan says voice dripping with sarcasm. 

Matthias looks at her and then at me. “ those are my terms.”

“Very well, we will go find your daughter and deal with anything that is in your fathers lab at the same time.”

As we walk down the passage Morrigan says “coward.” 

“He isn’t a mage Morrigan, he may be afraid of whatever is down there.” I tell her. As we turn a corner we are attacked by a couple of wraiths. Wynne puts up a barrier and Morrigan freezes them before blasting them with fire. 

“See,” I say “he wouldn’t have been able to deal with that.” 

“Hmph” was her only response 

“I hope the little girl is alright.” Wynne says. The passage opens onto a large room with some sort of puzzle on the floor and a little girl no more than about 8 sat on the floor talking too and stroking a ginger cat. “Odd that the wraiths didn’t attack her,” wynne said quietly. 

Suddenly the little girl noticed us. “ oh hello,” she says. “Have you come to play with kitty and me?” 

“That is no cat,” Morrigan murmured. As the cat looked up it’s eyes began to glow. Morrigan could sense a demon or spirit at any distance. As long as they left her in peace she had no quarrel with them, whoa betide any who tried to possess her though. 

“Your father is looking for you.” I say to the girl. 

“I’m fine here with kitty,” she replies. 

“Still I think you should go let him know you are alright.” 

“But kitty can’t leave.” 

I’m about to ask why that is when Morrigan says; “what do you want demon?” 

“I’m just a poor kitty looking for companionship.” It answers 

“Cats don’t talk like that.” Alistair says. I groan inwardly, “it’s not a cat Alistair.” I tell him. Morrigan gives him a withering look. “Fool,” she says before turning her attention film back to the demon. “Let’s not play games, what do you want? You cannot keep the girl here forever. Others will come looking for her.” 

“I want to be free,” kitty replied. “The mage willhelm tricked me and trapped me here. I cannot break free from it and the girl cannot release me.” 

“So you want us to release you in order to what?” I ask

“I want the girl.” It said. 

“As In possess?” I ask, "that’s not going to happen."

"Then we are at an impasse as she won't leave as long as I'm trapped here."

"If I free you will you let her go?"

“Very well” said Kitty. 

“You realise..” Morrigan began. 

“I know exactly what I’m doing Morrigan.”

She shrugs, “have it your way.”

Alistair follows me as I walk around the puzzle on the floor. “Are you really going to release a demon?” 

“It has the child enchanted Alistair. She won’t leave the cat till she’s seen it’s true form.”

“This is one of those times I should just trust you isn’t it?” 

“Yes Alistair.” If takes me a short while to figure out the puzzle, Morrigan giving her viewpoint on it every few moments whilst the rest of my companions sit on the steps watching what’s going on. 

“That needs to go there surely?” Morrigan says pointing to the area I’d just moved a tile to. 

“Would you like to do this?” I ask her. 

“You were the one who said you’d free the demon,” she said 

“Then stop interrupting me.”

“I notice they do that a lot,” says wynne to the rest of the group. 

“They bicker like siblings,” Zevran says “but then she does that with all of us.”

“You maybe,” wynne says. 

“That’s because she has a healthy respect for her elders.” Alistair replies. 

“I’m not so old as to put you over my knee.”

“Now, That i’d like to see.” Zevran chuckles. 

“You’d be next,” she tells him.

“Go right ahead my dear lady, I rather enjoy a good spanking.” 

Just then we complete the circuit in the puzzle and release the demon. It turns into its original form. “I might have known you’d be a desire demon.” I tell it.

“Now you’ve released me and I’m grateful I’ll be taking the girl.”

The little girl screamed and ran up the steps and down the passage to her father. “Oops,” Alistair says, “looks like she didn’t want to play with kitty any longer now she knows you’re a nasty demon.”

The desire demon screech’s and goes to attack Alistair, My sword gets in its way and in one swift move I’ve taken off its head. Wynne burns it. “Nasty business,” she says “I’m glad that’s over with.”

“You should have let it have the girl.” Morrigan says. She'd have done it no harm.

“Would you like to be possessed?” I ask her. Have someone say a demon would do you no harm?

“It wouldn’t never happen.” She replied. 

“Your evading the question Morrigan.”

“She’s good at that,” Alistair says interrupting. 

“So says the would be king, who avoided telling anyone who he was.”

“I never asked to be king.”

“Enough both of you.” I say before it escalated further. “Let’s go get the correct phrase for this Golem.”

We head back to Matthias, "you saved her," he says his arm around her shoulders. "She says you saved her from a demon." 

"Seems your father had one trapped down there. It’s dead, along with the wraith.” 

“ I think it’s time I left this house, who knows what other traps my father set up,” he says

“With the blight upon us it would seem wise to leave ferelden for a time. Do you have other family you could stay with?” 

“I have an aunt by the waking sea, we will travel there, you have done as you said and so I will give you the correct phrase as I promised.”

Back outside I stand in front of shale and repeat the words Matthias gave me, the Golem begins to move, “I knew the day would come when someone would find the control rod, it is another mage too,” shake said in disgust, it is what it is yes? Another mage.”

“No, it isn’t,” I reply, “there are mages with me though if that’s what you mean.”

Shale looked closer at me, “ah yes I see, you are not all mages. That’s one thing at least.”

“How long have you been out here?” 

“Many years,”shale says, “watching the wretched villagers scurrying about.”

“And the villagers had no idea they were being watched,” Alistair says “creepy.”

“I suppose you watched as the darkspawn killed most of them too.” I say.

“Yes I did, it was very entertaining too.” 

“Are you sure this a good idea?” Alistair asks

“No,” I reply 

“Have all the villagers been killed?” Shale asks

“No not all of them.” 

“So some got away, how unfortunate,”

“What do you have against the villagers?” I ask and then regret it as shale goes into a rant about them encouraging the birds, “horrible flappy things they are,” She says land on her and how the children would draw on her and how one of the villagers dogs peed up her leg. I turn and look at the others who are shaking heads and shrugging shoulders. I interrupt her tirade to ask if her name is indeed shale.

“I don’t know, I’ve spent years answering to golem,” she said, “golem fetch me that chair, golem pick up that dresser.” She went on for quite a while. 

“I think we should just go,” I say to the others. 

“What your just going to leave me here after all that?” 

“Well it seems like you have other concerns on your mind,” I tell her.

“Aren’t you going to order me to come with you?” She asks

“Why would I?” I ask, “most golems Are mindless clearly you aren’t. If you wish to join us you are welcome.” 

“I don’t know what else to do,” Shale says, “this is the first time I’ve not been given orders.” She looks around, “ what are doing anyway?”

“We’re are gathering allies at the moment against the blight” 

“Do I get to stomp on things?” She asked

“Yes, lots of things.” I assure her. 

“Very well I will come with you.” We make our way out of honnleath and I turn at the sound of squawking. There is blood and feathers everywhere and shale is shrugging her shoulders trying to look nonchalant. “Did she just stamp on a chicken?” Alistair asks

“She really doesn’t like birds does she.” Leliana says. When we camp up for the night I decide to have a talk with Wynne Morrigan and Zevran about what I saw In the fade. I walk over to Morrigan who has her nose in a book, “so it was flemeth’s grimoire you were retrieving from Irving’s quarters.” I say

“Yes,” She says sounding surprised

“When you were freeing Connor, Irving mentioned that I had a lot of faith in you, when I said that you were trained by Flemeth he said he had her grimoire locked away.”

“Didn’t hide it very well.” She said, “I suppose you told him I probably had it now.” 

“No, I changed the subject.” 

She laughed, “anything interesting?” I ask. 

“There’s so much I’m not sure where to start.” She says. 

“I’ll leave you too your reading then.” And head over to Wynne who is being pestered by Alistair to darn his socks. “Alistair Wynne isn’t here to do your sewing for you.” 

“But who's going to do it?” He whined, “I’ve a hole in my spare pair and My armour has frayed my breeches.” 

“I will mend them this time.” Wynne says holding her hand out for Alistair to give her them. “Don’t indulge him,” I say horrified, “he’ll expect me to do it next.” 

“I’ve seen your sewing,” he says, “that’s not going to happen.” 

“Go light a fire Alistair,” I say shooing him away, “I want to talk to Wynne.” As he wanders off I say, “you don’t have to do that.” 

“I don’t mind,” she says, “it keeps me busy.” 

“I wanted to check that you were alright after what happened in the circle.” I say

“Why do you ask?” 

“Was it a dream or a memory?” I ask.

“I had an apprentice,” she says watching Alistair light the fire, “I was too harsh on him and he tried to escape. He said he wanted to find the Dalish but I didn’t listen, the Templars went after him and he died because of me.” 

“Are you sure he died and the Dalish didn’t find him?” 

“No but I’ve never left the circle other than Ostagar and now.” 

“We have to go to the brecilian forest to get the aid of the Dalish, we can ask if they know him.” 

“thank you, but you don’t have to do that.” 

“Wynne this is something that’s been weighing on your mind.” 

She sighed, “Very well.” 

“You sound like Alistair when he doesn’t want to do something.” 

“Talking of Alistair,” she says, “I noticed you two are a lot closer since You first arrived at Ostagar.” 

“We’ve been through a lot together.” I tell her, “we’ve come to understand each other.”

“I see,” she says, “I wonder if you have thought about where your relationship might lead?” 

“Are you saying I’d hurt Alistair or he me?”

“Not intentionally but love is not easily tossed aside and you have a duty..” 

I interrupt her, “I’ve had this conversation with both Morrigan and his uncle. Alistair and I will not fail in our duty to end the blight, we know what is at stake, we have both experienced loss because of it.” 

“Of course, I apologise,” she said, “I didn't mean to bring up painful memories.” 

“It’s Actually Alistair that has helped me come to terms with what happened back home.” I tell her. “I understand you concern Wynne but you don’t need to worry, we are warriors and we all may not survive this, sometimes having someone is what we need to keep going and not give up.”

“You may be right,” she said, “now I better see what mess Alistair has got these in.” 

I leave her to her darning and walk over to Zevran who laying on his back staring at the stars. “Am I disturbing you?” I ask

He sits up and pats the ground next to him, “you could never disturb me my dear warden, It’s been a long few days.”

“Yes it has,” I sit next to him, “I wanted to ask you something if you don’t mind,”

“You can ask me anything,” he smiled

“What happened that made you want to get away from the crows?”

“Why would I want to get away from the crows?”

“Zevran that memory in the fade, the way the crows bring you into their ranks, you went through an awful lot to become one, something must have happened to make you want to leave, you were prepared to die.” He lay back and looked up at the stars. So I continued, “you said you expected not to live, you didn’t expect us well me to show mercy which means you were looking to die. Is that the only why you get to leave the crows.” 

“Yes,” He says, “there is no other way out.”

“And they’ll hunt you down if you fail.” 

“Usually.” 

“Something happened to Rinna, that’s who the guardian at the temple of ashes mentioned.”

“Curse your memory” he says sitting back up. “Can you not accept I am here to aid you?”

“Zevran, everyone here wants an end to the blight but not all of us are here by choice, Morrigan was sent by Flemeth despite her protests and other reasons which I haven’t worked out yet. Sten is here because they’d left him in a cage to die and he had nowhere else to go, you saw the circle, is it a surprise Wynne wanted to get away from it?” I say, “Alistair was happy to become a warden because he felt that he belonged somewhere after not feeling like he belonged in his own family. I’m here only because my family was murdered. Shales here because she had nowhere else to go. Leliana as much as she says she had a dream and that’s why she’s here, she’s also running from her past.” 

“ you make a valid point “ he says very well I will tell you seen as you won’t leave it alone until you wheedle it out of me.”

“Talking to a trusted friend can help unburden you from it.” I tell him.

“You will think less of me once I have told you.” He sighs, “Rinna, she was a friend and a fellow crow, I killed her because I was told that she had betrayed the crows, she begged me to spare her saying that she hadn’t and she wouldn’t because she loved me, but I didn’t believe her.” he gave a mocking laugh, “I Zevran Araini who was always boasting about how good I am refused to listen. Turns out she was telling the truth, she was actually in line for the Antivan throne but my master had made a deal to allow another instead and she had to die, he got me to do it.” He looked at me and I could see it in his eyes, the pain and regret I could imagine what he felt when he found out. “Said that I deserved to be brought down a peg or two, that I had become to arrogant and maybe I had.”

“You didn’t have it in you after that.” I said

“Yes, It was then I realised that I loved her too but it was too late, so I took the assignment to kill you because I knew I wouldn’t survive. I was expecting to die. He says, “but you didn’t, you let me live because you already saw what I was trying to do.”

I put my arms around him and give him a hug which he returns, “From now on death is not your only option.” I tell him, “and I won’t allow the crows to claim you.” 

He laughed, “I pity the crow who tries it.” He says “I am in your debt, for more than just my life, is a pity that your heart has been claimed by another. “ we both look over at Alistair who is watching us with a somewhat worried expression. “Speaking of which you better go and reassure Alistair that I’m not going to steal you from him.” With that he went back to staring up the stars. 

As I walk over to Alistair he says, “you are Zevran seem to be getting quite cosy.” 

“Cosy?” I ask, “I was was comforting him.” 

“Why would you need to comfort him?” 

“I saw what he was dreaming in the fade, what the crows do to their recruits, I wanted to know why he chose to try and leave after going through all that.” 

“He didn’t just leave though did he?” Alistair asks “he is being hunted.” 

“Tried to leave Alistair, when Zevran accepted the assignment to assassinate us he knew he wouldn’t succeed.” 

“What do you mean he knew he wouldn’t succeed? Oh..” Alistair looked shocked, “he wanted to die and thought we would do it?” 

“Yes,” 

“And that’s why you refused because you already knew that.” 

“I told you I saw it on his eyes.” 

“If I didn’t know better I’d think you were related to Flemeth.” He says “she had a way of knowing things about people too.” 

”There is something about her” I say, “ I’ve always known when someone was hiding something from me.” 

“Don’t I know it.” He says, “so you and Zevran aren’t?” 

“Aren’t what?” I ask “lovers? I think you’d have noticed, besides I love you.” 

“I’m sorry,” he said, “ I shouldn’t be insecure it’s just he has more experience than I do and..” 

“I’m sure Zevran has slept with many woman Alistair and enjoyed it, doesn’t mean I am going to be one of them.” I tell him, “you have no need to be jealous.”

“I’m not jealous,” 

“Really,” I say giving him a look that challenges him to keep denying it. 

“Ok maybe I am,” he says, “I see the way he looks at you, it’s the same way I look at you and I’m afraid that you’ll choose him over me.” 

“I already chose you Alistair, you are my prince, before we even came across Zevran, how much clearer do I need to make it to you?” He pulls me into his arms and kisses me. “I won’t question it again.” He says “don’t stop,” I mutter returning his kiss. He pulls away and has a broad smile on his face. You make me want to do things the chantry says is unforgivable.”

“Don’t let that stop you.” I say

He grinned “you are a very bad influence.” 

“You wouldn’t have it any other way.” I say pulling him towards his tent. 

“What are you doing?” He asks

“We need sleep Alistair, you said you weren’t ready so I’m not expecting you to lay with me, I’d just rather stay here with you, if you don’t mind.” 

“Mind? No of course not.” 

“Very well then.” the next morning we headed to Orzammar. Outside the city is merchants and stands selling all kinds of equipment. I spot a trader in the corner who matched the description the scavenger told us about. he has several weapons and armour on display, “do you have any Quanari swords?”

“Quanari?” 

“It would be a very large sword,” I say.

“Oh I sold one a few weeks back,” says “had a dwarf who was very interested in it,”

“Where is this dwarf?” Sten asked 

“In Redcliffe,” he replied

“There is only one dwarf in Redcliffe we know about,” I say.

“Dwyn,” Leliana says “you had to pay him quite a bit of coin last time.” 

“I’m not paying for my own sword.” Sten says. 

“You won’t have to Sten, we will talk to him.” 

“We have a mission to complete.” 

“Yes, it’s called retrieving your sword.” I say. “We’ll head back that way after we’ve rested the horses.” 

When we get to Redcliffe Sten and I go to see dwyn whilst Leliana and Wynne visits the Chantry and Zevran and Alistair said they’d meet us in the Tavern. Morrigan went for a walk and ser woof a lot decided to go with her despite her protests.

Dwyn opens the door, “warden?” He says, “is there something you need?” 

“You bought a sword from a scavenger,” I say, “do you still have it?” 

“Yes it’s in my chest. Why?” 

It is mine, I was knocked unconscious and lost it.” 

“Take it,” Dywn said, “I’m not going to argue with you lot after what what happened here two weeks ago.” He went to the other room and came back with the Sword. “Are you sure I can’t persuade you to part with it?” 

“No.” 

“Doesn’t say much does he” He says. 

“Aren’t is a man of few words.” I say. As we leave Sten turns to me and says,” are you sure you are a grey warden?” 

“Surviving the joining pretty much guarantees it.” I tell him.

“I think you must be an Ashkaari to find a single lost blade in a country at war.”

“What is an ashkaari?” I ask

“One who seeks that which is lost.”

“That’s very fitting.”

“Yes”

“Back to the one word answers again I see, let’s fetch Alistair and Zevran from the tavern.” 

“I’m surprised you agreed to let them wait there.” 

“Why?” 

“Are you not worried that they will become too intoxicated to fight?” 

“I’m more worried about Alistair running Zevran through in a fit of jealousy.” 

“You have a strange sense of humour warden.” 

“I wasn’t joking.” 

As we enter the Tavern Alistair and Zevran are sat at a table discussing feast day, “I’ve been asking Alistair what he wants for feast day.” 

“Antivan’s are big on Satinalia then?” I ask

“Oh yes, not that we need an excuse to indulge in any form of debauched behaviour.” 

“I can imagine the wild celebrations they have in Antiva.” I say

“What is this feast day that you speak of?” Sten asks

“The feast of Saturnalia is a holiday that widely celebrated across Thedas, do you not have parties and exchange gifts in serheron?” 

“What is the point of it?”

“To celebrate the coming of winter.” I tell him, “we give our companion presents, overindulge in food and drink generally and have a good time.” 

“Is there baked goods at this feast day?” He asks

“Baked goods?”

“You fereldens have these small baked goods that we do not, it is something that must be rectified.” 

“Do you mean cookies?” 

“Yes that’s it, cookies.”

“We get get some.” I tell him

“That would be most satisfactory.” 

“Well when you have finished with your feast day plans,” I tell them. “We need to fetch Leliana, Wynne and Morrigan and head to Orzammar.”


End file.
